"Jantelagen", "The law of Jante" is a very Swedish "folk law" and is roughly understood as "no one should think they are more than they are" or " no one is better than anyone else". Sorry, but I will break it, least said, not as in me believing myself to be better than others but more as the Swedes actually implement this; as someone being a Besserwisser, Chutzpah, or just an attention seeker which can be misunderstood as a "social sinner" ala Northerners. But Swedes break this all the time as we claim that we are the only ones having the concepts of "Lagom" and "Allemansrätten", roughly translated as "All men's rights" meaning that all are allowed to be in lands owned by private owners (except for plots and gardens of house owners without permission), camp, light up a fire, pick berries and mushrooms, etc., in public nature, as long as one keeps rules of taking care of the lands. And when I try to conceptualize "Lagom" I find it very difficult, but we can see it as "the middle". "How was the Thai meal, Britt-Marie?", one Swede asks another one. "Lagom starkt" - In English "Lagom hot", she answers back trying to say it was not too spicy, nor too bland. Also in Turkish & Arabic, they have the same idea, but they instead say "Taman", which is not exactly like "Lagom" but similar and which also is adopted in Albanian where it has the exact meaning as the Swedish version. Albanian and Kosovan laws, lastly documented in medieval times, also allow people to do the same as that which "Allemansrätten" defines, but with an extended right to also hunt as long as you have a license for firearms (though not many do this, except as nature conservation in desperate situations, as killing cute and beautiful animals is considered heartbreaking for most Albanians and many go beyond and seeing it as a sin of some sort. At least it used to be this way. Albania has in recent years banned hunting altogether after the devastation of wildlife due to hunting tourism from abroad and in Kosovo people with old traditions in mind don't respect the modern laws for a license which has had a negative impact on the country's fauna), which later made them popular places to visit among hikers or "backpackers" who like to be free in the sacred wilderness. Sorry again. So, my life journey begins with the God and my soul existed before my body, and that is how I know who He is and He knows who I am, in a special way.

In a dream, I saw friends talking kindly as youths, but something was stressful. I was challenged by someone or I felt that something told me that I would now for a while be living on Earth to get the word from God The Lord and return to win what I saw in the dream, or else! And a cousin told me that the one who does not believe in fate will burn in Hell. Then I was transported through the Universe and the star constellations and finally to our blue and beautiful Planet. Anyway, I have had much luck, but like an Indian proverb that says, "Before enlightenment, one must fetch firewood and water, after enlightenment one must still fetch wood and water", I can't say that I can do anything for myself. The good that comes to me is from God, and for the unconscious bad, I hope my God sees and hears me so I can be forgiven, for I am bad and He is the only One who has created life. And I ask you to have some understanding of small mistakes in this text.

In ancient Greek mythology, there were not just fairy tales, myths, or stories of "gods", but also other spirits and even people made themselves apparent. Such was the story of Icarus and Daedalus, the father and son who were detained but decided to flee. The father Daedalus had an idea. Daedalus realized that they could take the feathers from the birds and with wax to make wings which they would get help to escape with, and fly away to freedom forever. After doing so, they began to escape, but his son Icarus looked at the sky for a long time and got hubris. (Hubris is an ancient Greek term that means arrogance towards God, gods, or the high power.) Icarus's hubris was based on his desire to take a step further and fly to the sky and Sun, but instead, he was punished for it. The Sun's heat melted the wax that held the feathers of Icarus's wings so that he fell to the sea like a stone. The moral of this myth is of many kinds. One message is that you should always listen to the Father, God, or the high power - not getting hubris, as it is called in Greek. Another interpretation is essentialistic, which argues that the myth of Icarus and Daedalus has a message about what is possible to build and what is not. If man builds airplanes, this is good but if humans build UFOs, she will be punished like Icarus, who would not listen to his father's request not to fly too high and instead settle for just escape and freedom. Maybe if the God wants us to know, He will give appropriate knowledge of how to accomplish such a task, and maybe someone should ask why the Universe was created and what nothingness actually can be or do you not see that space is not empty but filled with small particles and unseen energies? Imagine if you somehow remove this and create nothing, then would for example 1000 light-years be long, or would it not instead be instant in between the start and finish? Perhaps Icarus even may have survived, given the importance attached to that he fell to the sea? But there is something else I believe in and follow, that is the Creator of the universe and Islam. What, am I not allowed to be free and have a private life?

There is nothing wrong with believing in a Creator and also being special as a human person. Problems start when belief in religion is confusing and deliberately corrupt. I can't really say anyone is perfect, but considering the concept of "God", He must be the Ultimate Perfection, Forgiveness, and All-Wise. By the way - hi reader, my name is Fatmir Ahmetgjekaj (or Good Fate AhmedJackson, roughly translated) the son of Osman, Zenun, Abaz, Beqir, Zekë, Kekë, Gjekë, Ahmet, Mustafa, Prekë, Lekë, Vukë Son of Lekë, way back to the late 15th- or early 16th century from the unique town Isniqë. A strange story goes that Lekë (Albanian name for Alexander) had three sons - Canë, Nikë, and Prekë, being from the clan "Shala" (there are 12 clans among Albanians and traditionally the Shala were the smallest and poorest of them, except for Isniqi, whose inhabitants are 100% ethnic Shqipetarë Muslims with all descending from Lekë's three sons and the "Qetaj", and where the richest of all. No worries about inbreeding because the marriage traditions among Albanians, generally derived from this region, and specifically Isniqë, follow exogamic laws, meaning we don’t recommend couples to marry from the same clans, and though it is not prohibited, most of us think it’s best for the identity and union of the people, at least in old days but even in those times young boys and girls dated each other but they were in the end married to someone chosen by their parents. And, although they could speak against their decision it was not socially acceptable to go against the family, which of course resulted in many broken hearts, and in rare yet extreme cases bloodsheds and feuds. The reason why my surname isn't Gjekëahmetaj ("aj" at the end means "of those"), due to Ahmet being Gjekës father, has to do with how Albanians used to take names from forefathers before it became mandatory with a population register during the early 1800s and late 1700s Europe, resulting in fixed surnames. The Orthodox Albanians and Muslims used "grandfather - father", while Catholics traditionally used "father - grandfather - grand grandfather". Prekë and Canë converted from Catholicism to Islam (but later Canë converted back to his old faith) and became leaders of the Valley by the leave of the Ottomans after saving the daughter of the Osman/Ottoman vizier or Bey of our land. According to the story, some 400 years ago, the Bey of Dukagjini region in northern Albania and Western Kosova (Dukakin sanjak in Turkish) with the center in Pejë, announced a reward to those who would save his daughter who was kidnapped by a band of rebels after she was recovering in the countryside from an illness. Lekë and his sons with the Bojkas family took up the fight and crushed the band of Montenegrins, but Lekë and his son Nikë died in the battle, sadly so did the young woman. No one knows for sure how she lost her life, but what is known is that the daughter of the Bey had a love affair with the captain of the band, alà the Stockholm syndrome. Some, say by an accident, while some believe that, out of a broken heart, she committed suicide, yet other men accuse her father of killing her as a punishment for sleeping in the bed of an enemy. The Bey, still feeling they should be rewarded for taking up the fight a winning against the band of criminals, asked what he could give to them. They replied that since the mission did not succeed, meaning the girl was not in life, they couldn't ask for anything. Seeing them as humble, the Bey then wondered what family they belonged to, since he indeed never heard of something similar before. Learning upon which tribe and lineage they had, the Governor let them then rule the land and build a town. They converted and to show their sincerity, Prekë constructed a mosque, dated to the first or second decade of the 1600s (I forgot the exact date), still standing and having Zekë's name on a memorial stone, who by the way was a tribal leader during the end of the 1700s and beginning of the 1800s, and who also is the first known to have taken the surname which we now got. This story used to be told at the end of Ramadhan at the feast of "Eid al Fitr", seen as an interesting myth in our region. This is a simplified version of the incidents which also are told, by the Norwegian social anthropologist and ethnographer Berit Backer in her work Behind Stone Walls". It's an ethnography of Albanian culture, derived from the mountain area of western Kosova and Northern Albania. The study takes up traditional aspects of Albanian householding, family life, social life, and traditions, focusing primarily on the traditions and laws of Isniqë, as it used to be the cultural Kosovar center. Isniqë is also the village where Isa Boletinis was from,- leader of the Albanians during the liberation wars against the Ottoman Empire and the Montenegrin & Serbian wars who aimed to share Kosova, which resulted in independence in 1912 for Albania. Though he was born in Isniqë he actually lived near Mitrovica in the area of "Shala e Bajgores" (the Shala of Bajgore) and was of course also from the lineage of Lekë. A famous story is that when he was in London for peace treaties he was asked to hand over his guns which he presumably did. After the meeting, the foreign secretary said: "General, the newspapers might record tomorrow that Isa Boletini, whom even Mahmut Shefqet Pasha could not disarm, was just disarmed in London", whereupon Boletini drew a small gun from his pocket and said: "No, no, not in London either”. Isa was in his younger days the commander of Sultan Abdul Hamid II’s personal guard for eight years before the Balkan Wars broke out and he then instead resisted occupations from all fronts. The war preceded and later ignited the First World War with the assassination of Prince Ferdinand of the Austro-Hungarian empire in the Bosnian capital of Sarajevo. The German Reichskanzler (Prime minister) Otto von Bismarck, aka “the iron chancellor” who united the German free and separate states into one country - The German Empire - once insightfully said “One day the great European War will come out of some damned foolish thing in the Balkans”). It has been found, in the Ottoman population registration "Defter Sanjak Dukakin" ("The population register of the Sanjak of the Arnauts (Albanians) of Dukagjini") from the 15th century, that my name, Fatmir, at least goes back to the middle ages. In this register, and also those of the Serbian kingdom, one can see the attempt to forcefully assimilate the Albanians of Dardania which later changed to the Dukagjini area, by changing their names to sound Serbian. For example, Gashi became Gashic, Gjekë became Jekic, Gjon became Jonic, and so on, thou these are traditionally not even close to being Serbian sounding from the beginning, both phonetically and visually. The Serbian occupiers also changed the geographical names as a display of the view of that land being uninhabited before the Serbs. But who lived there in the first place and how did the Serbs come to occupy it, as they surely did not drop from the skies as an eagle does? My surname Ahmetgjekaj, also written as AhmetXhekaj, is both Arab-Islamic and Albanian, probably Christian or Hebrew as well. Ahmed comes from the root HMD which means honor or glory in Arabic and Gjekë is an Albanian name for Jack, Jake, which in turn probably derives from Zechariah, Mary's relative, or John, Jesus, or Jakob, as they could have have the same etymology and family strain. Gjekë split with the others from the lineage of Mustafa, creating my branch of the family (other surnames from the lineage of Mustafa are the Mehmetaj, Sinanaj, and Ahmetaj).

My Albanian descendency has affected my life very much and has meant a lot to my soul. From my grandfather Zenun up to Zekë there are graves and monuments to visit, and the earlier of my ancestors are renowned. From the area of Theth, the small clan Shala consisting of a handful of families who descended from the royal Dukagjini tribe, in northern Albania and western Kosovo, moved to the Dukagjini Valley during the 1500s & 1600s and founded the town of Isniqi. Theth is a small village below the Valbona valley and river, they and neighboring families are of the Shala family, living in the small Province of Dukagjini - the founding area of these tribes. There used to be 4 major regions that belonged to Shala,- the Dukagjini of North Albania, Isniqë in the Dukagjini valley, Shala e Bajgores, and Ulpiana in Karadaki, near the eastern border. Many prominent figures belonged to this, in number, insignificant family, and some are still remembered. One is the Commander in Chief of the armed forces of the Dukagjini Valley during the early 1800s, my great-great-grandfather Beqir Zekë Ahmetxhekaj. He got the lands of Rudi's village (named Rudica in Serbian. Originally there were two brothers - Rudi and Budi - Budi founded the neighboring village Budisallci (a Catholic Albanian village), and Rudi founded Rudina, Rudeshi or just Rudi, as it is called in Albanian (one in the majority Muslim Albanian village, with some rich Romani and Serbian houses)), a village in the conjunction of Kosova's and Albania's largest rivers Drini and Burimi (where they become one river named "Drini i Bardhë" - the White Drine). Rudi's village used to hold the only bridges crossing the rivers in the western region of Kosovë. But I also lived in the capital Prishtina, and later, me and my family moved to Sweden in the summer of 1991. Albanian tribal society is one of the last living ones in Europe, dating back to at least Illyrian times, known for being a community consisting of different totemic tribes and clans, and the tribal traditions were similar to those of the aborigines of different people around the world. The other nation is famous for wearing the Kilt, living in Great Britain's High Lands, and is called the Scottland. Just as the North American aborigines or indigenous people, Albanians had haircuts resembling Mohawks, Crows, Caddos, etc, but also a belief in totems and spirits affecting people's lives. The belief in Fate was and is still also an important part of the culture, where it is many times linked with different unseen creatures such as the warlike "Zanas", the soft "Mira", the beautiful "Ora", and the mysterious "Fati".

My land is formed like a square and is surrounded by mountains with two valleys in the middle (the eastern is called Dukagjini and the western Kosova - together in ancient times "Dardania") and a hill from north to south between the two valleys in the east and west, and the area around Isniqi is known to be the central location of many of the Albanian legends, situated between Albania and Kosovo. The town is, for example, central in chapter 17 of the legendary and historical chronicle "Lahuta e Malsise", "The Highland Lute", which was composed by the friar and poet Gjergj Fishta in a traditional musical and oral form (which was a common old way for Albanians to tell legends of heroes, mythology and significant events) and which also is called the Iliad of modern Albania. It's not mentioned before the end but paradoxically as the chapter is finished it calls for the start of a war between the occupiers at a meeting of the wise city. In the Mediaeval times, the Serbian king Stefan Dusan occupied the Balkans (except the Albanian Alps between Albania & Kosovo, and Athens in Greece) and also Kosova for some decades, becoming an important center of Serb nationalism, and the proud idea of it being the birthplace of them. Also, later the Muslims came there which we of course are familiar with as well. Like many other occupations, they are many times not just nor friendly. Some Albanians had fled to the mountains and were after Skanderbeg and Lekë Dukagjini heading back to their homes in the valleys, after being occupied by enemies, while the ones left were forced to adopt Serbian rules. There's also a world-famous monastery (Visoki, Monastery of Decani) near Isniqi and its river (1 km away), a UNESCO World Heritage site which the medieval Serbian king Stephen, who is seen as a saint in orthodoxy, rebuilt and is buried at (built on the foundations of a former Albanian church and which was, according to archaeological excavations, preceded by Iliro-Dardanian temples for prayer. According to over 40 inscriptions in the church, dating from 1330, it was constructed by the Albanian stonemason Don Fra Vita Kuqi on the land properties of Hak Kuqi),- a church historically and still much venerated by Albanians who until the early 1900s was guarded by assigned Albanians by the Serbian Orthodox Patriarchy. This temple is actually filled with frescos and some show images that are said to depict UFOs (one of the strongest "evidence" held by ufologists that man has had a belief in extraterrestrial life long back in history). Many times, the locals report strong bursts of light on the mountains and the valley. I came to hear a lot of these strange recalls from locals of the area, who with colorful detailing described bursting round light in the sky. One man told me that he, as a child, had been there, on the mountains, with his grandfather and another, when suddenly round, big and strong glows were revealed a short distance away.

My actual birthplace was in the hospital of Peja on the Summer Solstice of 1984. This particular night, I was later told, was a powerful such. It was a stormy Thursday morning with thunder rendering asunder, on the 21st of June, or 1404 in the Hijri calendar. More precisely, the night occurred during the exact last quarter of the lunar month, the 21st, 22nd, or 23rd of Ramadhan, depending on the time of crescent seen in the last quarter. To also compare with the medicinal thesis of Carl Herman Tillgahen, strange circumstances like the hospital being situated on a south-facing slope, and that the Moon was in the waning half phase, could mean I was meant to know herbs and the practice of them in Shamanic traditions. About storms and lightning, it says in the Quran, surah 13:12, that: "It is he that allows lightning dazzle you, and inspire you with fear as well as hope, and it is he who drives the heavy clouds". Also, Enoch describes thunder and lightning in the context of blessings, in 4:113.

The Moon has meant a lot to people, since ancient times. They said that the crescent Moon in the new phase symbolizes rebirth, a good time to start a new project, or a time to build strength. Full Moons was considered to be dangerous, yet very powerful. Instead of exploiting the danger during the full Moon, rituals of power were instead performed one to two days before and after. Those who wanted to rest well, have a good sex life, or understand death, could take advantage of the waning lunar cycle, pagans believed a time ago.

Midsummer is a peculiar cultural celebration, strangely celebrated in honor of the Solstice Day. The maypole is raised which symbolizes a male phallus, fertilizing mother Earth, and the rite may explain why it almost always rains on midsummer in Sweden - I mean, that's what the ritual is performed to do The sky will fertilize the Earth with moisture and earth shows its fruits filled with tastes, texture, and liquids. During the celebrations of "Midsommar", the Swedish party participants usually dance around the maypole (he phallus) and sing "små grodorna, små grodorna är lustiga att s"e - "meaning "the small frogs, the small frogs are peculiar to see", while simultaneously jumping around imitating frogs. I think this is indeed what James Frazer would call "Homoeopathic" or "Imitative Magic", in his theory of "Sympathetic Magic". Frogs, as we know, usually lay eggs and come out around during wet times, especially on rainy days. Few know the background of why Midsummer became such a big party in Sweden. Some do it for the fun of it, others because it is tradition and some do it because Midsummer is considered sacred. Still, girls pick seven or nine flowers to put under the pillow and hopefully see the one they will marry. It is said that this day was surrounded by sexual energy, which also explains why the pole is stuck to the ground. The axis of the earth towards the sun, during the summer solstice, is approximately 23.45 degrees. The solar calendar in use on these days is the closest proximity to the actual rotation of the earth in relation to the sun,- which in the Gregorian style calendar is calculated to be 365.2425 days, or also 365 days, 5 hours, 49 minutes, and 12 seconds. The actual tropical year is 365 days, 5 hours, 48 minutes, and 45 seconds; thus 27 seconds shorter than the humanly assumed calendar. This means that every thousands of years the date on the Gregorian calendar on which the solstices occur will be one day earlier than before. This, and what is said by the anti-pagans from the Judeo-Christian institutions, means that for example during the peak times of the Roman empire around year 0, of the Julian (now Gregorian) calendar, the Pagans celebrated this celestial phenomenon around the 23-24th of June instead. So, for example, in the year 2084, it will thus more likely occur on the 20th of the same month, in a new era, falling on another date this time and forward. John the Baptist's day of birth was more or less deliberately placed during what at the time was the summer solstice, some others may believe. We'll see and know, one a New Time. And since the NT retells that Jesus was born half a year after John, some Christian believers think that he must have been born on the opposite astronomical phenomenon - the winter solstice - at the time of Jesus occurring on the 24th of December.

In Prishtina, the capital of my homeland, there used to flow a river which now is dry most of the year, hence its nickname "the city without a river". It has no tourist attractions, rather it has a fun atmosphere with its eccentric, humoristic, and cocky people. So, there is no big difference to another bigger city in that sense. I grew up in the center of Prishtina, on a hill called "Bregu i Diellit" (Sunny Hill). It has a splendid view over Clinton Boulevard, the sports hall, and the odd-looking library, which has been dubbed to be the world's ugliest building, though I must say that taste is somewhat personal. At the time we lived in a small house, a little modest and spartan, but it was a friendly spot in peaceful times. This feeling came soon to be replaced by the horrors which marked the end of the 20th century, and which was the reason we had to move to Sweden. As a kid, I used to walk around the neighborhood and meet friends and hook up with girls, nevertheless, I had no friend I could call a close one. I instead used to go to the area's school to meet and play with the others, the older ones, as I was only a couple of years old. They seemed so brutally cool and funny to hang out with, but I had nothing special to offer, which I felt was required for a hard-demanded acceptance. One day my father bought some marbles for me, in different sizes and colors. From morning to evening, I used to be in our backyard, just training on precision, aiming to be the best in the area, as is usual for me to behave like. As the days progressed, I finally felt the extra heartbeat which convinced me that I was the winner in the schoolyard. Full of confidence for the victory, yet with shyness towards the "elders", I waited for the break of the classes when all rushed out to their favorite plays. One by one, their marbles came into my possession. I don't know how others play "kilikera" (Albanian for the game), but we used to win the other's balls if we hit the hole. Or more exactly, first, you had to, just like in golf, shoot the ball in a small hole dug in the ground, and the one who reached it first got the opportunity to hit the opponent's ball, and if doing so that one wone the other one's ball. Stop thinking stupid thoughts, please. Of course, I won all of theirs and had now a big bag full of those funny and peculiar glass things. My opponents were three others, going to 4:th grade, but in their loss, they seemed smaller than I at that time. Not in me being a "bad winner", but they as being the "sore losers". They threatened me with a beating if I didn't hand over mine and their balls back. I just took off and started running, so fast that I forgot to look where I was heading, having the three ones thrusting their anger at my back. We ran by our house and down the boulevard and into the main center and the crowded, busy areas of Prishtina. "Who are these folks", I remember asking myself, as the looser friends now also had lost my tracks and I could breathe out again. I remember this kindergarten, with big windows and beautiful teachers, always with wide smiles and vicinity towards the boys and girls playing inside. "Why can't I go to a place like this?", was my huge question and quest in life. That was the exact moment that I knew that studies were the only way to friends and a good future, me only being about 6 of age. From there on it became a dream to graduate. Beside a fountain, an old man was smoking cigarettes and just like me looking at all the people in their stressy routines, just "being himself" it seemed like to me.

I didn't know the name of the street but the area's name was catchy.

I went back home with a smile and longing for my mother's warm welcomings and caresses, as always when I came back from my adventures. But she also has these embarrassing sides. One time I got a haircut. She simply took a bowl, put it on my head, used it as a template, and made me look like a medieval monk, now making it more difficult to get to know friends. Or so I thought. Many saw it as a cool look, and I'm not saying I had a play in it, but this style came to be the mark of the next decade and the popular look for pop music boys of the 90s.

I used to love summers in Rudina or Rudica, in our countryside, where we had the rivers to bathe in, the blooming fields to gaze at, the animals, and the adventures. Once I and my cousin got run over by a tractor, driven by his father and my uncle. He died, sadly and his father still has deep marks after that, of course. I survived thanks to a Serb and our neighbor Dimsha. He was the only one with a car at that moment, and he drew me straight to the hospital. Another time, my female cousins asked my mother if they could take me for a play around the lands. They liked my looks, something like an albino. We went to a deserted well where we used to watch frogs. Playing with frogs was my and my sister Majlinda's favorite game on rainy days. We ironically compared them and argued who had the most beautiful one. An inherited trait it might be. I once saw my daughter Mira picking up frogs, without being scared or disgusted, during our walks around Glänninge sjö (Laholm's small city lake), when she was only 3 years old having a cute pink beret and squeezing those tiny lives with gentleness. It was there I realized why we in midsummer in Sweden dance like frogs.

Suddenly one of them lost grip and made me fall into the water. Had it not been for the uncle who accidentally killed his son and almost killed me, I wouldn't still be breathing and writing. The cousins screamed for help, and the only one around was Jashari. He ran as crazy, threw a bucket in but missed, threw it again but missed me again, yet a third time, and this time it hit right,- I got fished up. We also used to swim a lot in the two rivers, and one time a big stream hit my ears from both sides which gave me an ear infection, almost leading to deafness. On 1 May, we played Nazis and Partisans, in contrast to Cowboys and Indians, as normal children did. We also had to parade in uniforms and hail Communism. There's so much to tell about this wonderful place, with robes of tragedy and a walk of pride & joy, but I leave it for now.

Once I was at the city museum of Prishtina to see an exhibition of WW2. I remember it as being today. A big poster hung on the front wall, showing Adolf Hitler leading hundreds of people in a march. The Swastika was in the top foreground, giving a very powerful impression of the leader who I thought was a king or something similar. I actually enjoyed the tour but felt sorry for the humans around who seemed unaware and sad about the incidents. The people shown were dead or dying and seeing my lands being in the struggle itself by those similar to the evil embodied, I became scared of grownups and sad for my people and country.

I also remember me and my father going to our ancestor's "Kulla" (fortified buildings, some as old as 400 years, built when Prekë's mosque was built at the start of the 1600s, according to the inscription on it upon its completion) in Isniqi. There used to be over 600 of them around the area, but during the war between 1998 and 1999, most were deliberately bombarded and destroyed. Now only around 50 exist, which were rebuilt by Sweden (maybe because of the name similarity to Pippi Longstocking's villa called "Villa Ville Kulla" in the story by Astrid Lindgren). Still, after more than almost 150 years after Beqir moved from there to Rudi's village, they and we on important occasions, such as weddings, births, or burials, meet together. There, in the damp rooms of stone, called "Odë e burrave" (the hall of "men",- a title not based on the actual gender but prestige gained by honorable acts and wise sayings - my aunt Ziza is a "burrë", man. Actually a sworn virgin) decorated with wood and sheepskin having a sheep sweaty and wild smell, the elder leaders talked wisely. I marveled at their strange ways of weaving wise words, which convinced me that a God is a Creator of us and all. This faith I strangely lost in Sweden, as a child only being around 10 years old. But now I know that we are obliged to understand that there is some stuff that our senses cannot grasp and that it is not a loss to believe - since if there is nothing, we have at least tried, and if there is a greater purpose of our existence, then I win and can meet the God.

Back in Prishtina, or to be more exact nearby in Obiliqi, my father was a teacher of history and literature. After the death of Josip Broz "Tito", the leader of ex-Yugoslavia, Milosevic gained power. In Tito's times, Kosovo got autonomy, having its own constitution, flag, territory, and equal rights in the confederate. But Slobodan Milosevic's politics were much the opposite ones. He held a speech on the fields of the country, commemorating the death or murder of Sultan Murad and the loss of the war between the Ottomans and Balkan lands, which led to Islamic rule for over six centuries. The war of Kosovo was the turning point of the Ottoman occupation, and here the conquest of the rest of Europe began, which has yet to show gratitude to firstly Gjerg Kastrioti a.k.a Skenderbeg, and later to Lekë Dukagjini - the enigma of the Kosovars and North Albanians up to modern times - who defended and hauled this plan of the Turks. Now called Kosova was before called Dardania, then Moesia Superior by Rome, Dugagjini in the Middle Ages, and Kosova by Serbia at the same time. The Turks kept the Albanian name and called it Dukakin Sanjak Vilayet (Dukagjini Administration area, stretching to the city of Gjilan, the eastern border near Prishtina & ancient Ulpiana where Lekë Dukagjini was born), long before the conversion to the Islamic faith. After the battle of Kosovo in the 14th century, the Serb commander Obiliq stabbed Murad to death in his tent. Obiliq is now, by this somewhat cowardly act - to be the national hero of some sort. The successor, his grandson, Mehmed Fatih came then to be remembered as "the conqueror" after laying siege and taking over Constantinople, at that time the seat of the Orthodox church, built by the Thracian/Illyrian Constantine the Great who also converted Rome to follow Jesus Christ. The political climate of the 1990s was now very harsh for minorities of the former union, especially for the Albanians, consisting of up to 92% of Kosova, the others being Romani, Serbs, Goranis (simplified - Catholic or mostly Muslim Serbs), and Boshniaks. An example of this change from wealth and peace was the introduction of an apartheid system, the firing of state employees of Albanian ethnicity, the segregation between Serbs and Albanians, and the killings & imprisonments of protesters of injustice. My father took up the fight and with only five other colleagues he arranged an action in his school. At that time, Albanians were not allowed anymore to learn and teach their own language, and the Serbs had different schedules, in contrast to their contra nationals. So he and his 500+ High school students and colleagues went to classes as usual during the schedule for Serbs, just to be met by police and military.

They were imprisoned and tortured. After my father's loss of his job and his political activities, we had a hard time, least saying. The nail "that closed the coffin" was my earlier ear infection, which the doctors claimed was about to destroy my hearing altogether and so they recommended me to travel to Sweden for treatment. My father sold everything we had, bought a ticket and we came to our friendly country in Scandinavia, on the last week of June 1991. Still, he held famous protests in different cities, and the biggest was the one in Sweden's capital Stockholm. After the war, he finally got to meet Ibrahim Rugova personally, close to the time of Ibrahim's deathbed and the proclamation of the land's freedom from Serb occupation and the sovereignty of the country which Rugova officially called Dardania.

This bus trip took our family almost three days, driving through eastern Europe and closing in to the final destination by going through Germany,- at that time to me only a mythological place.

Glad to be in my earliest childhood's favorite country, before only being a saga or a fairy tale made for and by grown-ups in my mind (what more can one expect from these confusing times?), I looked around licking the ice cream at the resting place beside "the Autobahn". "When my friends hear about this, they will be so amazed and jealous", I thought to myself not knowing it was going to be a "long time no seen". At last, we arrived in Helsingborg, Scania - Sweden. We moved a lot in the beginning. First to Göteborg (Gothenburg), then to Dalarna and Sälen, Backamo (Uddevalla near Ljungskile and the western Swedish archipelago), then to the Finish in the majority and woody Hyltebruk. Hylte had a strange smell due to the paper mill factory. We compared it as a fart of a cow, breathed by the pigs, and refarted again - stinking stomachturning sourly. In this small city, I had my first Lucid dreaming.

I saw myself being chased by a motorcycle guy with a shotgun. I hid behind some bushes afraid of dying. As he approached me after noticing where my hiding place was, I in my fright somehow realized it was only a dream and with willpower managed to change it into another. It continued by taking me to this endless hall having doors on both sides. They all teased me to open at least one of them, but I just kept marching in the stress and hope of finding the end. A while later, while still continuously walking, I finally got to reach the end door. As soon as I stepped out, an amazing feeling of joy and freedom came over me, as I saw the green trees, breathed the fresh air, and got the light over my face.

Lastly, in 1997 we moved to the place where we live now - amazing Laholm. It is the oldest city of Halland which has been settled since at least the early Iron Age, having mysteries under the ground as above the sky. Laholm is seated beside the river Lagan, and in ancient times it was a central hub since the only crossing of the river was here. Everywhere, there are small hills, the tumuli of the Iron Agers, which we call "the graves of the kings".

I honestly used to be nice as a child. By the time we came to our new city, I had just turned thirteen years old and got new friends, the closest both Swedish and Kosovars, and we were bad boys, in the least. The only three Albanians in seventh grade were me, Patrik, and Pec. Patrik is of Catholic origin. Our families were almost neighbors in Albania & the Dukagjini basin, but we have known each other since Sälen, being around 7 years old at that time in the refugee camp of the Northern Highlands. Burim Peci used to be a wise guy, and during the war, we had our own fight - tagging UÇK (KLA - Kosova's Liberation Army) on every public building. We decided to leave private places free to choose sides in this dreadful war, but the government had to pay for their actions. May we be in peace brothers. And, also, all three are from the same tribes of the Shala, Mertura, & Dukagjini families. For some destined and strange reason, we went to the same class out of six other classes. The things we did, were so funny, yet made the schools almost explode out of rage and main concern. We smoked weed, before even trying alcohol or cigarettes. We stole, fought each other and others, cursed, and simply acted as a no one else had will except for us. One time we were detained, as normal we sneaked into our history teacher Åke Sintring's (a former journalist who made interviews with both the Nobel Peace prize winner Mother Theresa and also Heavyweight champion Muhamed Ali, and more) drawer and took some old tapes with the recording of Hitler's Nuremberg speech. The loudspeakers vibrated through the halls of the school, to the yelling of Adolf, with us standing in a sarcastic give-guard position. There was also a girl with us, I don't remember her name now, and I'm sorry for not writing down everyone and also for telling secrets, which are so obvious - actually, also to our cannabis fascist Police chief as most probably would put me in jail for just showing off. To this day it is a mystery why that girl was detained with us three, as she was smart, studied a lot, and was most of the time quiet and friendly to all. Her expression while looking at us being silly said it all - "Is this normal or is the world upside down?", I assume she might have thought to herself. Boring it was, indeed, to guard the empty school at that time. So, we decided quickly to investigate the neighboring classroom for the "special needs kids with disabilities". Here we sat on their wheelchairs and started racing against each other, to the sound of the frantic "Sieg Heils" from the Nazis through the halls. We had just repeated the teasing conquest of social outcasts, similar to what Jesse Owens did in the Olympic Games of 1936 in Berlin. Åke Sintring had a bad taste for Nazism, he really really despised that narrow-minded ideology and another funny story about this is in class while handing out the corrected essays about WW2. Me and a guy, Sebastian Knutsson, were previously sitting in the library studying for the paper. Secretly he, I of course conclude, had written a Swastica on every page of my work.

At first, I thought the anger came from me writing about a theory I and Sebastian previously had discussed together - that Adolf Hitler's mother had Jewish ancestry, making the ambition of the Nazis somewhat suspicious. Maybe Hitler was conspiring to give Israelis a country by giving Europe guilt after the holocaust, or something? But it sure wasn't that theory that the concerns were about, of course.

I wonder what this man thought about us after all of this strange stuff, which seemed we were having plans to chase Jews down the corridors of power, repeating history. My idea of all that happened then is simple. It's inspired by a dream, of course. Hitler didn't like to labor. His ambition was to become a renowned artist. And he never went along with females, as we now understand. To have a wife he needed power and the ambition was to overturn Communism, which inspired many contemporary Jews, according to Nazis. As a "media gay", he was talented in artistry, grasping the attention of desperation by trying to turn it from powerlessness and loneliness to "victory" and glory for the German people. Eva Braun was thus his prize. How could his "megalomaniac" persona cope with being ordinary while keeping such a gem, without it being stolen by some huge thieves, he must have reasoned with his "I"? He also must have felt the Allies’ presence as a "cockblock", as they approached the bunker where "the two love adlers" embraced one another and Adolf gave her the last kiss while cocking the famous luger which echoed to the heartbreak of Braun, or more probably the release of "the brown", as they both fell into each other's arms and the director behind the camera guy (in their head), in this melodramatic yet obscure love scene, shouted: "Cut - that's the perfect ending". Adolf Hitler was before the cock in "the chicken coop" and now the Germans faced losing face through the defeat of the Axis powers by the power of the war ax. But he loved Eva, sincerely. How is this possible, one might ask? Just think about it. Historians try to deduce these horrific incidents by pointing to madness, hypnosis, evil, ideology, hate, etc,- and there are hundreds yet more of these limitary and, most of the time, subjective theses,- while simply seen, it was destined by the God for the Israelis to recieve the land of the Palestinians, and also then to test how we all act - that's the big pic to contemplate! So naturally, as there are stars above, there are countless reasons for all actions that happened then, and also in life, generally speaking. This is now, of course, only my personal theory regarding WWII and how it came to happen. As said, I saw all this in one dreadful and heartbreaking dream, and now, who wants to know those of mine? Therefore, we all need responsibility.

After school, we had a gang, other than the three of us,- Lot, Sabri, Love, "Sumiqi", Mirza, Asmir "Asse", Elmir (who now has settled and has it straight for himself as far as we know), and others. Laholm is to some degree known for weed. It has been grown here forever, and by some, it is also thought that the word "cannabis" actually derives from here, since "the father of botanists" Carl von Linneaus' disciple Per Osbeck lived and died in Laholm municipality. He was a citrus expert and traveled to Kina, among other places. This is the reason why some argue that his theory of cannabis originating from Kina or the Himalayas also led to Linneaus naming it after the Latinized word "cannabis" after hearing the word "kanop" (meaning rope), among Balkan hemp growers. Still, others argue that the word itself is much older and has always been associated with ropes anyway. The word for rope in Albanian is for example "kanop", which was mostly made out of hemp due to its strong fibers and easy growing. But, Laholm was also the first town in Sweden that the EU allowed to grow industrial hemp, making way for other farmers as well. One time we had taken some hemp, from the fields, and sold it as "good shit", which now thinking about it actually was. Martin, with my blood, forgive me now, I am so sorry for 100% brother, "kompis". This is what many do here, grow weed and smoke it all day long, but still have the normal "svenneliv".

The place is marvelous with the only bigger hill until one reaches the mountains of Scandinavia some 1000 km to the north. If one travels from Malmö, Scania to Halland, one gets to see the municipality from a high altitude - the 300+ meter high hill named "Hallandssåsen". Other than this, South Sweden is flat like the palm of a hand or the sea of this city. The western area has the longest sand beach in the country, with a beautiful half-moon-looking bay. It's the perfect area for us originally from North Albania and landlocked Kosova.

But due to my misconduct, I almost failed to graduate from Junior High School - "junior high" is the keyword. "Aim for the stars and you might reach the tree tops", Inga my class leader as a cliche once said. I had never heard that saying before and thought it was meant for me only.

The school board and teachers had gathered to straighten "Padde", me, and Pec so we could find a good future. All of us somehow managed. I had exactly, and only, one point above the requirement to be approved for that test in biology. I remember it was around in ten subjects that I risked failing, but just in 4 months, we accomplished what most in that stressed situation wouldn't even give a chance to do. When we finally had to choose for Gymnasiet, I fell in love at first sight. In the brochure, I saw: "Read media and try different ways to communicate and have fun at the same time". I have never felt it with a lady or someone else, but am sure "Love at first sight" exists as a phenomenon due to this. Media with Journalism, it had to be for me! Sweden has a system for Gymnasiet, which could roughly be translated as High School. Here students choose among different subjects to gain experience and knowledge. It can be related to Social sciences, Health care, Media, Vehicles, Electricity, Production & Industries, etc.,- where some lead to a guarantee for employment in that sector after graduation, while others are more as a preparation for University studies. This marked a new chapter for me as an honest person aiming to become "someone". Some of my old friends and acquaintances are either buried, in prison, or alone in their abuse. Others are thriving with family, careers, and friendship, of course.

One doesn't need to be perfect at handling words to become a writer. Without a story, it doesn't matter how good you tell them. "Empty barrels make the biggest sound", they say. So many lives are wasted on dumb stuff and many people are left behind others. I say: "But, if empty barrels are used for drumming, they are awaking, and the best of beats and rhythms comes from the joyful heart". But this kind of storyteeling would with certainty be called "mallgroda" (model/template frog) in Sweden, simply being "as a high hat" of writings. By the way, Laholm sucks, all!!

After "Gymnasiet" and my Journalism studies there, I applied to the University, specifically the Journalistic Program in Huddinge, Stockholm. For some reason, the start of the program was in the spring semester. So, me and a friend, who also faced the same 6-month gap, had both worked and saved money and decided during a basketball game to travel before the studies. Our first idea was to go to Ibiza. But, after a hectic teenage life, we were a little fed up with parties and stuff and decided to rethink. Papua New Guinea also came to our minds, but that was of course too far-fetched and also too expensive. Then, as lightning on a clear day, the third idea ultimately became the choice. During the end days of the trip to India, we found ourselves in the town of Pushkar, Rajasthani desert, in the northwestern region. The city is famous, mostly for its Brahma temple, which is said to be the only one dedicated to him in all of India. Brahma is the creator of all, according to most traditions in this very spiritually renowned country. Anyway, one day while sightseeing along the center lake (which operates like the main square and is the religious sacrificial area, having "Gaths" for prayer or other spiritual rituals), I met a street vendor who sold me a Shivalinga. A Shivalinga is, as many times said, a "phallic altar" used during worship of Shiva, and is available in different sizes. He is thought to be the destroying power of creation and he is also described as one riding a bull (Nandi), having a trident as a symbol, and the Ganges River flowing from his head, and he is assumed to generate a sexual force, hence the "phallic altar" which is connected to him. The following I found when I recently studied the Shiva Purana: "Just as Shiva's energy is considered the greatest of all goddesses so the earthly phallic emblem of Shiva is spoken of as the most excellent of all". The altar depicts a penis (lingam) in a vagina (yoni). Shivaits pours milk on the Lingam running down the Yoni, which finally runs down on the ground, to symbolize fertility. To me, it seemed suspicious, that someone randomly wanted to sell an altar. I saw that the linga was much older than the others I'd seen, and it had green algae around its circumference. The linga was actually a sacrifice, being sold for a small money to a tourist, my mind came to realize. People offer everything from food, money, jewelry, flowers, and similar objects to gods by throwing them into the center lake. Then, there are unfortunately those others who like to follow them by diving into the water, taking whatever out of value that can be found, and selling them forward.

The same night I dreamed that I met the owner of the altar, who wanted it back as someone had sacrificed it to him in the Pushkar Lake. Then, Shiva danced in my dream with red and furious eyes, in the dark of the empty space saying:

The dance got more and more furious, and while dancing he slowly moved backward until completely disappearing. Instead, from out of the dark void, I heard a quiet voice that simultaneously took my soul to the most mysterious places in the Universe. The angel told me that the only worthy of belief was the Creator. "He is the God of Islam", he continued, and "He promises you a gift if you have faith", the angel ended the dream saying. I saw the stars fall, one by one, the Sun came up and the moon went down, in the dream, and I woke up with a troubled soul, but with a strong will to act. In my mind was:

I decided to return the Linga to the lake but strangely enough, I could not find my shoes, so I instead took my friend's slippers and went to the city center lake. When I arrived there, I immediately threw the altar away and turned my feet back toward the hotel. But, again, my soul was troubled. "Oh Shiva, if it really was you last night in my dream claiming the linga, give me back my shoes", I said with a loud voice in the middle of the town, and in English according to my memory. As soon as I entered the hotel's penthouse, one of the hotel workers came up with my shoes and told me that a monkey had just run down with them from the ceiling. Monkeys are thought to be helpers of the divine, in some mythologies, as the one with Hanuman & Rama, who retrieves the healing herbs from the high mountains to heal the wounds and save the life of Lakshmana (Rama's brother). This strange story came to evolve even more, later in Sweden, a story I sometimes get blown out by when contemplating the events, and do believe and follow whatever my God demands, out of my fear of me losing some special opportunities. Many years later the second dream, with the angel, could have come true. God gave me a shooting star as soon as I asked. Nobody, or few believed in me and the wannabe believers assumed that I was worshipping the person Shiva, or was possessed, until a dear female friend, whom I love very much, asked me if I indeed believed in Shiva, due to the incident? Unbelievably enough, I hadn't even prepared myself for such an obvious answer to an interesting and straightforward, but till then absent, question. "Yes, I believe he exists but I don't worship him!", I simply said. How could someone do such an ignorant and really evil thing? Why would I give up my belief in fake wishes?

Just as in the strange coincidence in India, one summer night in 2005, I asked God if He could give me that sign I was promised in the dream with the angel and Shiva in India. "God, if you really exist, give me a shooting star, and so I am going to believe in you forever", I said in Swedish. Lo and behold he gave me a cascade,- a shower of lights brightening the empty dark sky, filling my heart with happiness. The shooting star, or cascade, fell above me at the same moment as my question was over. And as the sparkling stars of the dark and tranquil night, for a moment, seemed festive and formel, and being put there solemnly for me to witness, I placed my forehead on the wet and soft grass,- to me smelling of soil and comfy motherhood. This incident completely changed my mind about my future. Without any preparation, I had officially now signed up to be a reporter in religion. Many would probably instead have asked for a big house or the love of this world, where I just couldn't find any other way to get evidence of the existence of God other than to follow my backbone and intuitive spirit. This led to the biggest tests of my life. I lost the old one and was given a new one. I lost all falseness and found one truth. I lost many companions but found the best friend in the world. I found out that most are being belied and are sleeping. We obviously don't see with the eyes but rather with the inner soul and unfortunately, the unbelievers fumble in the darkness of ignorance because of their sleepy senses but the one searching for the truth will surely find it. I will, display certain circumstances in the squared drama between religious traditions, scientific academies, institutions of society, and tales and show the God's eternal domination:

Now, becoming a convincial, I began to do my subjective, spiritual, and kind of a Gonzojournalistic research, by digging deeper into who God is and what value of fact and truth religions hold. As I got more familiar with my own path, finding interesting facts surrounding my birth and name, I also got more metaphysically aware and got more inspiration to the understanding of the meaning of existence. During a sub-train trip to the university, I opened the morning paper as usual. There used to be two main free news magazines in the Stockholm Metro, one called "Metro" and the other called "City". Now, I don't remember which of these two I was reading, and it's more peripherical facts anyway, but the contents of that day trembled my body and shook my mind. "The tower of the Stockholm town hall was on fire this night", it said. The Townhall is famous for being the place where the Nobel prizes are handed over and it's an icon and a landmark of Sweden's capital. What's then so interesting about that someone had brought fire upon the three crowns? I had a dream, that very night before, that I saw the tower and its golden crowns being lit by sky-reaching flames. In reality, the fire was actually small, but the emphasis lies more in that I had a vision of this the same time it happened, without knowing it beforehand. I had never before envisioned the future and it was so grasping that I, while reading the news, missed my station and had to take the next sub back. This was the first God-inspired dream I had, after the one with Shiva in India, and this was the terminal of departure into the religious and mystical world, which took my soul to unimaginable places and experiences, so much that I never will return to just being stationed amid stress seeing others travel while wondering where they are going. I have tickets, a passport, and a Guide to my special journey.

A funny and fascinating thought which also is a common red thread throughout this text will be the focus on influential assumed to be Albanian persons, more as a gimmick if not as a lesson of power and speech, and that no one can stop or change the factual truth. So, there is an importance to thus address the emic belief of this nation of our times, in this wast and ethnic and spiritually diverse world in which we live. If I may. We, the Albanians have our own way of calling ourselves. "Shqipetarë", is the word for the "eagle's heir", "the children of the eagle" or "he who has an eagle's gift", which also is the official domestic name for Albanians. We, in addition to the Bosniaks, individuals, and Muslim immigrants, are the only European traditional monotheists. According to a "Shqipë" legend, that looks in many ways in addition to the most common, a young hunter was supposedly in the mountains hunting. He soon came up to the nest of a great black eagle, where it had left her baby bird completely alone with a snake as the eaglet's food, a snake the mother eagle assumed to be dead. The hunter sees the eaglet left out with a threatening snake suddenly attacking the little chick in an attempt to kill it. The hunter intervenes, grabs the snake, and smashes it against the rocks. The eaglet is his, he decides and begins to climb down. At that moment the eagle's mother screamed, asking the hunter to her little baby. The hunter surprised by hearing a flying bird talk, still feels an urge to respond, and warns the eagle. He had earned the chick because she had been uncareful towards it. The eagle, in turn, says that the man was indeed mightier, but that she cared for her young, promising the hunter that he would get the eagle's force and sight with the piercing of the unseen world, speaking the truth (Interpretations, translations and saying what the unseen says is called Shqiptim in modern Albanian), everything which he aims at he will bring down, and his people would see a king and call him "Shqiptarë" if he would just put the tiny chick back in the nest. The man felt compassion and understanding and decided to go along with it. Surely, the eagle's word came to be true, there was nothing that could beat the man. He succeeded in all situations and won wars and in hunting, success was always the outcome for him. The small eaglet, which he once had saved, later grew up and flew over his head throughout its life. His people who saw it all, called him "Shqipetarë", elected him as king, and began following him. This version is one of the more. Others appeared and were told at other times in different places. Although not all Albanians know all the legends, still, they still believe they have "the gift of eagles" or a relationship with the eagles, but also of course to Zoti (the Albanian name for the God). A second Albanian myth is about two eggs instead. Also, this one ends basically in the same manner. This story explains how the Shqipetarë wins a legendary war with the support of two eagles and becomes a leader. A black eagle symbolizes power over death and fear in only one God, and the modern red background means that it has required blood to win and love to believe. Two heads or two bodies close to each other protecting each other's back symbolize the two original tribes Gega & Toska. But of course, it's just an old European hereditary symbol. The double-headed eagle has also been found all across ancient Illyria. There it is believed to have been a cultural and tribal symbol. It was placed in art on for example war shields or in architecture and stone crafts - in contrast to the claim of the anti-Albanians with no knowledge, saying it's only Gjergj Kastrioti's, Skenderberg, family symbol (This Albanian king, born in 1404-1405, was the highest-ranked Ottoman general who was sent to conquer Europe. Riding to Hungary, he instead changed his mind and went back to Arberia. Skenderbeg means Alexander the Great in Turkish & Arabic and his helmet with the two-horned goat is now at a museum in Vienna, Austria to show his significance for European geopolitics. But after his death European countries betrayed the Albanians and would it not have been for the Muslims we would have been a memory of mysteries). The eagle was a coat of arms in many Balkanic states and Arbenitian clans. They used both a single-headed eagle as well as a double-headed dito. In 2008 I dreamed of Iskanderbeg.

In the nightly dream my soul was the battlefield, to become Gjergj Kastrioti's horse, and then to become his sword and then I was a Muslim cut in half by it, and I became his horned helmet and lastly his word, vibrating in the air which I saw:

Keep in mind that to this day no one has ever worshipped eagles among Shqiptars, as far as known is. The second story, I forgot to say, is about a man who was shunned by his people, after a number of accidents he was accused of, and with ignominy, he lonely and hungry withdrew to the mountains, till he reached an eagle's nest where he found two eggs. After taking the eggs he went on his way down when the eagles suddenly called out for him to stop. He did not listen and continued instead with them, but the eggs were to be returned, had the eagles firmly decided, and shouted again and again. The man listened at last and now strangely he could understand their speech. He got a tip from the eagles - he would not be concerned over food and feel no guilt because of who he was. Just as the rivers carry the fish and food for the eagles, Zoti would carry the promise that the man would be called Shqipetarë and become leader, if he returned the eggs. After the eagle's promise, he succeeds. Among other things, he saves his people against the invading armies, by warning them since he sees them coming beforehand. And so he won the trust back. If these stories are true or not, are out for belief, and some may be and others not - but they tell about situations some strong men in hard times are forced to resolve by following the truthful soft heart and taking care of the earth. While we have the chance we would also like to remind you that man's first word on the moon was not the famous Neil Armstrong speech - "A small step for man but a giant leap for mankind "- but it was actually "The eagle has landed", which they said when their carrier "The Eagle" landed on Moon's surface! The Albanian legends can provide a new angle to the myths of Hellenism, given that they come from the same area and have similarities including the name of God, Zoti in Albanian. Zot is a God in the singular expression, while Zoti means "the God". Two other lesser-used native words for God are Hyji and Përendia (probably from the Proto Indo-European word for God - "Perun"; and "Dia" - Greek and Latin for God. Hyji is an Ancient word for light, star, or guidance - the root of the modern word Yjë or Yll, meaning star,- compare this with the old English "ysle". What postmodern influenced and false sources like certain Wikipedia articles claim, are thesis contradicting themselves. Serb nationalists and their contra-part the Albanian dito tell history as truth is invented. For example, Greek and Serb nationalists say that Illyrian is extinguished while at the same time for example Irish and North Europeans propose that languages such as Norse or Gaelic influenced modern Scandinavian and so on. One linguistic rooky easily finds at least 100 ancient words if you examine modern words in "Shqipë" - Albanian. The Illyrian tongue is indeed long gone, but the same rule applies to all and one must accept that we speak a language influenced by many generations and so to come. Had the biased nationalists known the future, sure enough, the ancient books would have been burnt to convey their ignorance towards Albanians. According to the Albanian consensus, Constantine the Great was from Dardania (ancient Kosova stretching to Naissus, or Nish in Serbian, the third-largest city of the country which was inhabited by more than 50% Albanians and the rest mostly Turks, before the 2000:th century and who were deported slowly to today's Kosovo and the Bosporus making the Serbs a majority by 1980 where there now lives approximately 80-90% Serbs), and had the double-headed eagle as a symbol which also is the symbol of the Orthodox Church. Constantine was the emperor who made the Roman Empire Christian or initiated the process and also created the city of Constantinople - the center of the Byzantine Empire or East Rome and the orthodox church, in what is known as the region of Dardanelles which in ancient times was a Dardanian colony and origin. The God knows best and is a real fact to believe in.

The day I was born was interesting in an Islamic and also a "hadithic perspective". "Hadith" means "stories, speech, discussion, or conversation" in Arabic, a word also mentioned in the Quran many times. In an Islamic context these mostly refer to the "Sunnah" of prophet Muhamed (Muhamed's path), may he rest in peace. In the Quran, the second surah verse 185 says, it is to read that:

The surah is called "Layl al Qadr", which means " the Night of Power", "the Night of Destiny", or also translated as "the Night of Decree" - referring to the night when our lives are believed to be predestined by Allah via His angels. "Layl" means "night" and "Qadr" means "fate" (my midwife's name was Layla, by the way). Furthermore, it states that the down-bringing of the Quran took place during "the Night of Decree" and there is a whole chapter dedicated to this highly expected night, which also is said to be the night that the Prophet Muhamed was initiated to the prophethood and received the first verses and the revelation from the Archangel Gabriel. Surah Layl Al Qadr writes the following:

Sunni Muslims (those who follow the Sunnah - way) generally argue that this night might occur on the 27th of Ramadhan, while Shia (party supporters of Imam Ali, Muhamed's cousin, adopted son, and the first to become a Muslim) believe that it is the 23rd of the same month. Muhamed is to have said the following when he was asked about the occurrence of the Night of Destiny: "Who of you remembers when the Moon looked like half a bowl?" -///- "Search it in Ramadhan's last ten nights" -///- "Because of a fight between some, about what night it is, I forgot it when I was asked" -///- "After a follower of Islam, asked the Prophet, may he rest in peace, what night the Night of Destiny was, Muhamed said that it was the previous, current or next coming. This conversation took place on 22 Ramadhan!" -///- "The angels told Muhamed that the Night of fate would occur one night with rain, and when the Prophet woke up on the morning of 21st Ramadhan the Mosque had leaked water after a widespread rain during the night", says, for example, Hadith Sahih, Muslim, and Sahih Bukhari. Allah explains in surahs two and three that man never holds his word and that better is not to promise or swear due to the weakness of man, but still a follower of Islam swore that he knew when the night falls and thus many believe it: "I swear by Allah that I know which night it is. It is the night the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, ordered us to observe standing in prayer. It is the night on the eve of the 27th of Ramadhan", says Sahih Muslim. This is the only one Sunni Muslims believe is a "Sahih Hadith" - a confirmed true saying. There are three collections of Hadiths that are believed to be "sahih" - Sahih Muslim, Sahih Bukhari, and Sahih Tirmidhi, authored by these three imams. All of these claim though that the Night of Fate is a night at the end of Ramadhan. The only night the Prophet Muhamed says is possible is one of the last ten, but rarely also sometimes it can occur on another one, eg. on the full moon of Ramadhan (according to Islamic sources, the birth of Prophet Isa, Jesus). Most believers who fast, stay up all the last ten nights in prayer during the month, hoping to find the right night and have their debts forgiven and prayer answered by the God Allah. Two major groups discuss the relevance of the Hadiths. Are they complementary to the Quran or not? Those who claim that they are not, do it based on two or three verses of the Quran, as the surah 77, the last verse: "So what ahadith after this Quran would they believe in?", while those who believe in them do also on the basis of two or three verses: "Follow Muhamed's way", calls the Quran. The stories people had about the Prophet Muhamed were collected and named "Sunah" - "The Prophet's Way". And, many of them were written down 300 years after the Prophet Muhamed's death, may he rest in peace, and some 200 or - 100 years after. But according to the God of Muhamed, everyone's deeds will be weighed, on a big day, including the prophet's himself. But in the end, I aim not to teach about the religion Islam or some other faith, because "the scholars" do it better. According to a dream I've had, my job is rather to send news regarding metaphysics and also to clarify religious misunderstandings.

Those who want blessings in degree, for example, with the Israelis (a people the God probably gave the most gifts to), read the Quran as a basis of understanding and for reconciliation in the religious and ideological conflicts inflicting humans daily. The Quran reminds us to be charitable, follow law and order, and believe. Because, the day of Judgment is knocking on the doors of time, space, and matter, and it will open in a moment without anyone expecting it. And the ones fearing that something bad will happen to them that day, ask Allah for help and call to Him. The believers also ask for spiritual gifts, and some for guidance. Then they ask to be spared from the path they have taken, who don't have Allah's blessings, or who have been affected by his anger. They cry out to the God, bow, and go down with their forehead to the ground, ending while sitting on their knees. In Islam, it is very important to have good hygiene, and before conducting a Salah (the worship ritual), Muslims wash their hands, face, and arms to the elbows, with wet hands wipe their hair, and lastly take on the feet up to the ankles before prayer, as taught in the Quran in surah 5:6. If someone wants to learn this technique, then that person would turn to the one who can, or a mosque and follow the imam. The believers meditate in Allah's holy name - eg. "Al Rahma"n (the most beneficient), "Al Rahim" (the most merciful), "Al Aziz" (the mighty one), "Al Fatir" (the initiator), "Al-Malik" (the King), and so on. There is heated debate on how to correctly perform the rites of prayer. How many times are believers supposed to bow themselves? The Quran reveals all of the rites, and the hadiths give more details, although they most of the time have different statements in between. According to one hadith, it's two times all five prayer times; another says four in all; then there are the usual - 2 (morning prayer), 4 (dinner), 4 (afternoon), 3 (evening), and (4 night), according to Sahih Bukhari and Sahih Muslim. But, instead think of it as recited in the verse of surah "Al Isra Al Miraj" which says that man should use their common sense and not pray too loud or too low, and the same applies to the number of bowings, neither too many nor too few, depending on situation and belief. Allah decides between mankind, the situation, and the reason for prayer, so in the end, if not everyone thinks for themselves and uses their common sense, someone will come and teach them as if they were babies. What are hypocrites afraid of? God sees all and helps the believer.

Why do some speculate what Allah, Muhamed, and a few others know regarding Laylatus Qadr, hidden knowledge, the future, or the dreaded Day of Judgment? 1000 months is equal to 84 years, which in turn is the average age of human life. Being born the night of Power, and as mine, a suitable name would in a sense be a miracle, as a story to retell. The Ahadtiths are not followed by all the Muslims. The view of those being added to the religion is shared by some., The group "Submission" and also the group Ismaili, Shia, and Sufi are just some of those who object to obscurities mentioned as true in the Ahadith. Out of those, "Submission" is a group that is very unique in comparison to traditional Islam. Simplified, they want to choose only the Quran as a source of their religious practice. However, it's a marginalized group. Rashad Khalifa was the founder of "Submission", which really is the English word for Islam, which is one among other reasons, why he later was killed in a mosque. He argued, inter alia, that he was a Razul (messenger, Rashad is a form of the word Razul) but not a nabi (prophet) and therefore differed in these two concepts. He was a mathematician and an American scientist, who said that the entire Quran was a mathematical miracle based on numerological occurrences, and further claimed that he had calculated that the world would end in the year 2300 (1777 on the Islamic lunar calendar, speaking of Nostradamus prophecy that Judgment Day will be in a year of many sevens). Some, on the other hand, wouldn't even consider calling themselves a Muslim having no support from Hadiths. They seem to not know the Creator, and instead follow the scriptures in their belief that scholars are wiser and guide to a straight path, as practiced by the ”Salaf” - the first nations after the death of Muhamed, peace and blessings be upon him and may he have good in the afterlife.

No one but the Creator knows when Judgment Day occurs but be prepared that it's always getting nearer. But in a dream I've had, the God had a measuring stick with dates instead of lengths inscribed, and a lever that could be moved up and down on the scale and asked me when I believed it would occur. I placed the lever at the numbers around the year 2300. He said: "It could come later or earlier". Why so much "hush-hush" surrounding the idea of the End Day? My theories: 1. To show His power of knowing the unseen, 2. To test humans; if the exact date was, we could do exactly what we wanted and just at the right moment ask for forgiveness and repent. Isn't God the Most Forgiving of all? 3. Life is a game, having specific rules and destinies, which are meant to be followed. If we knew the predestined beforehand things would be meaningless, like a game result spoiler. I factually don't know the precise time of this Day. It's impossible to be exact about time and space, except for Him who knows the secrets of the hearts. The reason I believe it's going to happen around the year 2300 is not because of some foretelling, scientific research, what Hindu scriptures, or believers calculate. I rather think that the rapid development of technology and knowledge is limitless, not to mention the dream I just told. If we continue in this way to discover new facts and invent and innovate technology, maybe we will come so far that we either will come up with an idea of how to be immortal or how to reach the metaphysical realm or at least be very near to this. So, in each case, I don't think that the God will let such a thing happen, ever. Instead, He will initiate the destruction of everything before letting us do what we want. The tree of life is mentioned in the Quran as "the tree of immortality" (not "the tree of knowledge", in contrast to the Bible) and it's the tree, Adam and Eve, are believed to have eaten from, without permission. Everything man does, is always an implicit expression of the strive to be indestructible and never die, or what else would be the ultimate ambition? But since we've come so far, we could just believe in Him and He will give us what we need and transform our existence into an eternal gift of bliss, or contrary, give us respite before showing who has the real knowledge and power of the material realm. Muhamed was given a revelation initiated on a blessed night, Laylatul Qadr - the night of predestination, whose occurrence no one knows except my Lord, to tell us how to be morally high and which eternal rules to abide, to reach the goodness of Paradise and not the eternal torment of Hell. About Muhamed, the Quran says the following:

Although my birthday finally will be revealed in conjunction with when time has passed altogether, my birthday is still interesting to take up, as everyone is born as I am, but in their particular and fascinating way. John the Baptist's birth, according to Christian history, is said to be the first Sunday around the Summer Solstice, while in the past it always occurred at that time and is held in some countries during the Summer Solstice and this thus represents the Sun and fortune, or luck. Man is on a test site where there formerly existed dinosaurs (dragons), other humanoids, and much more, but as I said much is a mystery. According to Islam, God sent the Torah to Moses during the sixth or seventh day in the month of Ramadhan on Mount Sinai, and according to the Jews, it was done during Shavuot when a feast is celebrated around seven weeks after Easter and is called Pentecost, in Christianity on June 7. Religion and text are apparently inseparable and having an intimate link to the rituals and myths, they can't be dissolved of their unity. Religions also form a sense of close bond in many social groups and are a vital part of man's common history. Thus the concept of religion must be very important and valuable to man, as it was remembered and written down by several hundreds of generations continuously.

The book that to my understanding has meant the most to the modern world, from both a religious perspective and profane, is the Quran. It tries to preserve the texts, myths, and history of other religious traditions in the same book. The Biblical books are more or less confirmed in the Quran and for this and other reasons, the Bible thus lives to this day. The Quran is a diverse book, which in simple narratives explores myth and tradition. Some stories are of European origin, yet others may be African, Asian, or American as well, of course. Some stories tell about the concept of birth & afterlife, perishability & eternity, morals & ethics, exploring marvels or miracles. Such a story is the one of "Dhul Qarnain" - the king with two horns, led by God, and who conquered the east where extremely sunburned lived, and the West where the sea was thick and built a protective wall of blocks and iron to a nation at a mountain pass against the northern tribes of Yajuj & Majuj, which, according to the King will fall and with that will also mark the Day of Judgment. That is an event preceded by a sudden attack from, all sides, and swiftly and briefly the tribes are believed to conquered Earth. Some are in the thrill of interpreting all they come across. An idea is thus, that Yajuj & Majuj are a people in the north of the empires, mentioned as Gog & Magog in the Bible as being part of the "Al Rush" region. It could be just a fantasy story, but to Muslims, Dhul Qarnain is a reality to contemplate. He was up till recent times, in consensus, believed to be Alexander the Great. He is often portrayed with two ram horns, which besides was a common symbol of the kings of Pelasgians. However, many Iranian scholars tend to, for obvious historical facts, dismiss the notion of him being Alexander. Instead, claims of him being an Arabic, Assyrian, or Persian king, are laid. Others also argue if it is Buddha or some Middle Eastern conqueror. Honestly, a conquering King being Buddha seems a little on the illogical assumptive side. The main reason for modern Islamic scholars tending to dismiss the theory of him being Alexander, though having so many resemblances with each other, is the ignorant claim he was a polytheist, although there is no evidence of him being that. What we know is that he only spread Hellenism with its philosophy, science, architecture, mathematics, state governing, etc. He went East, into hot India, and west seeing the thick Mediterranean sea, and built a unique wall, with brick and copper at a Caucasian pass, called "the Gates of Alexander", and unified the old nations under his embracing rule. In fact, his teacher and one of his closest friends - Aristotle - is famous for his Monism and belief in one God above all, which he called "Theos", meaning "the God", and he is also famous for not believing in superstition as well, something the modern metaphysical philosopher McIntyre strongly argues and is renowned for, not to mention the medieval Islamic philosopher Ibn Rushd, the rest and earlier Muslim scholars as well, who regarded themselves as Aristotelian. The ones who also reintroduced the ancient text to us. Aristotle could be called a "Theist" - a believer in God - but not so much a religious person, in the sense of organization or the concept of an Abrahamic monotheism, thou seeing and emphasizing its importance in ethics and morals. Alexander is in Judaic tradition one, if not the only, foreign ruler the Jews joyfully embraced and accepted, although the same can't be said about Alexander's successors - the Seleucids - whose descends were from the Macedonians and ruled until the Roman conquest. In Jewish history, Alexander was believed to be a Monotheist who was sent from JHWH and who interpreted the Tanakh and retold it to his men. In Islamic tradition, Muhamed got the revelation of Dhul Qarnain during a test from the Jewish Rabbis who asked him to retell the story of this ruler, who had traveled to the West and the East. Prophet Muhamad thus recounted his version and recited the verses of Dhul Qarnain. In the same chapter, the nineteenth "The Cave", the story of Moses' companion, the immortal green man "Khider" is also narrated, not to neglect the mysterious myth of "The Seventh Sleeper". These stories have one interesting common thread - eternity. Alexander was, according to "The Alexander Romances", looking for Khidr, who had found "the Well of Youth". In the Quran Khidr lowers a ship at a dock, kills a youth, and rebuilds a wall without payment, to Moses' confused and furious mind and expressions, with the explanation that he only rescued the sailors against a pirate king who killed and seized ships and that the dead youth's family would be replaced by a better son by God, as that killed youngster was about to do something evil against "pears", and the wall he built he did, without Mosies noticing it, to dig up a treasure which a father had hidden prior to his death and which now, of course, belonged to orphans. Everything he did without needing to know why, and explains to Moses that some things can not be seen. Then, there is the story about the young fellowship and their dog who escaped their society and its decay, hid in a cave, fell asleep, and were resurrected by God after 300 plus 9 years (300 solar years is equal to 309 lunar years). These are of course not counted into the genuine group messengers called Prophets, rather they are, for a specific task, period, or another number of reasons, chosen holy persons and many times also bringing important contemporary messages, whose life is the key. Prophets on the other hand are those who prophesize or have thus revelations and visions from God, sent one after another in a certain fated pattern. The Quran mentions about 25 prophets by name, and some without, but they referred to for example in forms as "the prophet who did Saul/Talut/Taul & David as kings", which is Samuel in the Bible, etc., (sometimes, God has also sent 300 or more or less at once, others were murdered and others mentioned in other books and have reference there). The Quran is thought of being complete and coherent. It also rhymes, and so should preferably be recited (although normal reading can be done) in entirety in Arabic, to grasp the message in its own way. The verses of the Quran cover and repeat everything that has been said, simply, and a contradiction in that would automatically imply a contradiction to everything else, even in the Bible, as the objective is to reach the same God.

In total, the Quran mentions 99 of the names of God, but there are more of course, and when Jesus returns from heaven and Muhamed's successor frees the world the other names are to be revealed (according to hadith, it is the Al Mahdi to be called Muhamed, Ahmed or both, and maybe even Jesus (is not a prophet as Muhamed is considered the last prophet.

Mahdi, together with Jesus, shall restore peace on Earth and defeat Antichrist. Strange occurrences shall appear, where one year will feel like a day, and the World is plunged into chaotic warfare and natural disasters. According to the 27th chapter, verses 82-88, a creature created from Earth, a being which by most Muslims is believed to be a flying dragon:

Islam teaches that their religion preaches the pure and original one and that all really are Muslims but that they have not realized it yet, and thus the majority deny that they may have gained knowledge from Muhamed. Allah says in the Quran that He accepts no other forms of religion other than Islam. So, why do not people wit, like those in the city of Nineveh?

The Arabic Quran, like all other records, should be read in the original language. As the Quran is very empirically inspiring, it contributed to the creation of a major technical and philosophical development in both Islamic countries and Europe. Islam developed the Arab political power significantly and for Europe, it meant that the former ancient scriptures from for example Aristotle and Plato, for the first time were translated into Arabic and from Arabic into Latin. I've been using a lot of references from old sources such as Herodotus, and Homer (historians are not sure if it's a person or if the word means "Isles of man" in ancient Greek, thus it could be that the real names are the Iliad and Odyssey of the Isles of man), The Bible or Septuagint, Theogonia, The Aeneid, and so on. But are they mythologically and historically factual? The thing is that there are no original manuscripts that survived up to our days, so all these "Ancient texts" were actually written during the Middle Ages, by Christian monks who got copies from somewhere and which today are lost. The oldest Iliad is for example "Venetus A", written around the year 1000 AD. There are almost no original manuscripts from these times and yet we hold them as being that, even though these manuscripts have in much later times been transcribed. if one studies the language used, one easily see that they seem to be written with words from ancient types of Greek, Roman, Babylonian, and so on, meaning that the Medieval transcribers did a fair job in this, while knowing ancient tongues and myths. Most of the ancient books and stories were actually recited and some were sung or had at least an oral origin. Some of the best examples in modern times are the Iliad and the Odyssey. I suggest looking into this topic of the origins of ancient books more thoroughly in other sources. There is always a problem, though, with transcribing old texts. One must take into consideration language, typography, alphabets, meaning, and unknown words, not to mention that many of the manuscripts usually are damaged and therefore the gaps are filled with assumptions and corrections to what they could originally have said. Arabic concepts, such as mathematics, chemistry, and algebra, were incorporated into European languages and Sciences. This, and the Islamic translations of the ancient books, are some of the other key factors of the revolution, the people began in the late Middle Ages in the 1500s in the majority of Christian Europe, the other being "The Printing Revolution". The Church in Rome studied these books and considered them to be inspired by God. They studied the texts and had branches that later led to Alchemy (through Magic or metaphysics, refining or creating chemical substances, such as gold & silver, a regular chore for magicians in the Middle Ages) and a Christian form of astrology. Few could read and write at the time, and the process of the Renaissance took longer than necessary. Even in India, Veda traditionally was recited orally in the belief that it was a revealed text, so-called "Shruti" tradition, unlike the human recorded "Smrta" (remembered, accessible to laymen and general), where the books of Purana are being incorporated, but written nonetheless down in four collections. Veda has indeed been an inspiration to other holy Hindu books. In the Bhagavata Purana, one can read about Vishnu's avatars, and, according to this memorandum, Vishnu says that he has been somewhat young/small, a fish, a turtle, an eagle, a lion, the dwarf king, a shepherd, the enlightened, to one day return to Earth as a ruler when religion wanes and society is close to collapse. He comes as Kalki, with a comet-looking sword to remove the dirt. Kalkin will be born in the village or Kingdom of "Shambala" (in Buddhism, "Shambala" is a paradise surrounded by mountains), as a Brahman and is going to be a fighter against demons and in the end, restore the original doctrine:

Perhaps the Purana speaks about the Hindu god Brahma, or a man, what do I know, I am not a Hindu, but I do not think God is born, as it is against my belief, Islam. The Quran says, surah 112:

Incarnation may be possible only if a God intends it so (for example incarnate love as a human person or if Satan regrets he could become a human to pay his debts), but reincarnation is not logical if the World is a test and if there is a punishment & reward (or how would man learn to be good if life wasn’t only for once in physics and a second in the hereafter, with no end, argues those who hold fast the unrepeatable-life idea? And, can eternity exist if there is no temporality, meaning an eternal and cyclic world by itself seems irrational and contradicts the dualistic creation? Eternity and temporality are mind-puzzling states indeed). Kali is an alleged female idol and according to some traditions associated with death and destruction, which have been named the last of the four ages in Hinduism. Kalki is a name that is also associated with time or fate, from the word's root which means time and calculation. Again, in the forme cited verse, it is mentioned that during the "Dwarpa age", the Vedas were created, which are also the years of the Aryan time (3700 years ago, being among the first if not the first man-made scripture which sadly enough is not complete and also edited a lot later). It is further said that Kalki will be born, greatly enough in the same month as I (according to the North Indian lunar calendar) under the name of "Shri Vera Dharma Kalki", either in April or June (Vishnu is associated with the Sun and descend to Earth when the Sun has its main point - 21 June). Even Krshna is associated with time: "I am also the tireless time", Krshna says in the Bhagavad Gita at 10:34. Mahamaya, Buddha's mother, dreamed of him being conceived during the Midsummer festive. Then also, Kalki is said to perform a horse sacrifice to succeed. Moreover, it was customary to sacrifice horses in the region from Iran to Bangladesh.

Zoroastrianism is a religion that, although having followers being persecuted, still lives today, mostly in Iran and in Western India. They believe that "Zarathustra" was a prophet and who will return on Judgment Day, flying on a white horse with wings. They also believe that "Ahura Mazda" is the Creator and the name of God and that this religion is among the first if not the first living monotheistic religion, and Zarathustra has also received epithets as the first monotheist. Their book is called Zend Avesta and is a form of a hymn written by Zarathustra, describing a struggle between good and evil, which also is the foundation of this tradition. It originated in Persia, today's Iran, several thousand years ago. Zoroastrianism's sacred symbols are commonly the Sun disk and a God named "Deava" like the Hindu word "Deva" (meaning a god), and even in the early Iranian religion someone with the same name and character like the Vedic heaven Indra, is mentioned. Some believe that Zoroastrianism is a form of Aryan religion. The Aryans moved across the world and lived near Persia, so it may be a fact. When the Aryans later left India and crossed over Himavat or the Himalayas, they came to a desert (could be the Gobi or the Takla Makan). The rest of the Aryans (the lower casts, since only the Pandu brothers remained from the warriors and had previously died, and also one of them, Yudhishthira, alive taken up to the sky by UFO) migrated towards all of the Earth. Veda divides Indians into two parts - "Arya" and "Dasa". Arya is shown as bright as the Sun, meaning noble. That might mean that the others were white Sudras (lower Aryans dealing with pastoralism and agriculture) of Aryan origins. Today's Slavic people and descendants of Europeans, have some historical and genetical association with these ancient cultures and nations, the so-called Indo-European. The word "Bhaga" turns up frequently in the Vedas, meaning supreme God, and is also the name of God in most of the Slavic languages where it is pronounced the same but written as "Boga" or "Baga". In Yajurveda, it is mentioned that the Sudra and Arya were created and their master was night respectively day, according to the Black Yajurveda, and the white one says that night and the day became their consorts. This means that the origin of the Sudras was a dark-skinned ethnicity (those without protection from the Sun) and the Aryans were as light as day. That night and the day became their masters means that they are believed to be subjected to this fact. Think about this:

A month's exact length is approximately 29.5 days. As we all are familiar with, of course, twelve months form a year, which is 354 days. The Sun calendar, on the other hand, was historically used to calculate the time during the day, and the seasons. It takes 34 years (which, incidentally, is a human generation and further the age the love pairs have in Heaven) for the seasons/season year to meet with the lunar year so that each month falls in the same position where it started, the same age as the inhabitants of Jannah, the Garden of Eden, have.

Whether these powers, predictions, or occurrences are real or not, the God should still be the only reference point and the focus. All indications point to these occurrences, stem for me from God's will. These relationships, I found out about afterward through various religious websites, calendars, and texts.

He gave me His sign in the sky and then in a divinely inspired dream, I was also blessed to be called Fat'h, whose significance means victory, and it does not matter if it really was "Layl'at ul Qader" or not. You should have faith in the Almighty God. As you may see, the story and my personality form a kind of link, symbol, or sign to describe how everyone's power, imagination, or rather God, will one day be revealed, The One who should be listened to. The Quran teaches that:

In the autumn of 2007, I and two acquaintances went to a deserted place, where I talked about the evening I had the sign from God. One replied, as afflicted by Icarus-like hubris, by saying that he had never seen a shooting star in all his life when a comet suddenly entered the atmosphere and burned up a few hundred yards in front of us, and almost hit us. He did not want to believe and see how odd it became. Survivals are those who fight against evil and falseness. God is The Truth, and my only Guide in this short existence. He, the God gives everyone a new "shot" to understand a become good, I believe. Be thus humble and respect your life and others’, because one can never know how and when it ends. According to an Indian proverb, "it is equally rare to be born as a human being in this world as to see a sea turtle stick its head up out of the sea".

At a seminar during my University studies, we discussed different subjects regarding faith and religions, as usual, but this time something inspired me. In a split second, I knew that my goal as a reporter would always be to research the God as a phenomenon. So, I started to analyze the methods of religions, such as meditation, prayer, hymns, and exercises. Also, to find out what "the meaning of life" is, and try to become "one with nature", I tried researching different religious practices. By negating or confirming, my theory was to present the results of my methods as facts of God's existence. A methodology was meditation, but it was from time to time too boring, grey, and hard to balance, even if it gave me peace to a certain point. I also slept over at Hallandsåsen, a hill near my hometown Laholm, and sometimes in abandoned buildings. The research had indeed impacted me, as a young man in all imaginable ways. Experimenting with different hymns and religious styles I had visions of various kinds, such that a comet is heading towards Earth with high collision risk, again confirmed by NASA, though it depends on the man and God. Such and other mentioned scenarios are always present as a threat & trial from my Lord. I later started trying out prayer. To be fair, the testing with certain hallucinogenic plants and chants made me go nuts, and I needed to find peace. And, at first, I didn't understand the shape of prayers, but I gave them a curious and desperate chance. Now, contrary it has almost become an addiction of bliss. Honestly, I recommend only prayer and meditation! My job is, by God's leave, to work correctly, truthfully, and impartially to provide worthy information about religion to audiences, wherever they might be. Often people do not believe in religion. Infidelity is a common way taken by those who find it difficult to believe in a Creator with omnipotence, according to the Quran in Surah 6:124:

The same as in the above verse was also said by a psychiatrist, to me, when I told him about my experiences. "How will I believe without seeing the same for myself?", he asked and called the cops on me. If you do not understand the relationship between religion and my birth, I can naggingly clarify it one more time. John the Baptist was born on the summer solstice, the opposite of the winter solstice which is Jesus's birthday. In the Jewish calendar my birthday with the month of Sivan when Shavuot is celebrated, the time of harvest, offering, pilgrimage, and revelation of the Torah. In Hinduism, I was born in Vishnu's avatar ascending day - when he leaves the world for rest, and when Shiva descends. Shiva means good fortune or luck, like most of the major figures in Hinduism. The Hindu calendar is also divided into two halves, where the first half, from the winter solstice to the summer solstice is called Dakshinayana and from the summer solstice to winter is named Uttarayana. In the Bhagavad Gita, chapter 8, you can read the following:

The year is also divided into so-called Ekadashis, which are 24 consisting of 11 days each. Vishnu goes to sleep in Tholi Ekadashi, corresponding to the summer solstice in the Krhsna Paksha, the waning moon phase or the phase coming after the full moon when it darkens again and the Nirjala Ekadashi enters, which is the holiest one and it's when you observe fasting without water and food for 24 hours. There is a legend that tells this story:

Daostically I was born in a day that is thought of being the ultimate natural balance, from a calendrical perspective, and is which is considered to have the best "Chi" between Yin and Yang the years can have. For the Nordic part, my birthday was on a Thursday, in conditions related to Thor, luckily, rain, thunder, and Summer Solstice which is one of the most important holidays, of course. Buddha's mother Maya, dreamed of the Buddha's birth during "Midsommar" with the crescent Moon, and even the Buddha is said to have come to the day a year later. In Nature Religions, I was also born during the greatest ceremonial time - the Summer Solstice. By the way, I really don't brag. I think these circumstances are good info in relation to the words of Fate & Miracle.

I'm always being struck by how religius texts and their mytholgical reality seems to be bundled with ordinary life and especially related to me. And, I dream just like any person, but woild ike to comment on some of the dreams that were extraordinary in the context of my meeting with my God. By the way, they also reflect what I wrote about above. My God taught me religion and may He guide me on.

If you read the previous five chapters thoroughly, you realize that what the God wanted was to make a symbol of how a sign and miracles come to exist. They are more or less about me in convey and as an understanding that we are part of a greater mysterious plan by the Maker. He is our destiny,- the final goal. To see this story as interesting, it's crucial to have read the books in this text's bibliography. For those who have some degree of knowledge of myths and religious stories, my path is funny but also a tragedy. Some may only be familiar with a couple of these, while others maybe have read more than I have and so will benefit a lot by doing a comparison to my life as a symbol of God with the original mythologies or histories of the religious world.

See this story as you want, and maybe it's not traditional in a sense, but I went through fire and sea to gather information and inspiration for this work. I am not a scientist, a new prophet after Muhamed, or his God who once sealed the prophet's road, but just one who opens the seal and tries to tell about its content. If the God does not want me to write this, then may He help me, both economically and in inspired knowledge in the making of something else, or at least may I in that case be forgiven. The coming dreams are just a handful of what I've seen, and I chose those that have somehow made the greatest impact on me and which are more relevant to the public. The others usually are more of a personal kind. Whatever happens, I "sat my brick on the wall". In the sum end, It's unique,- me having meetings and talks with all the prophets, major religious figures such as Jesus, Buddha, Muhamed, etc., religious events, and Himself in His dreams.

I once dreamed of King David, Solomon, and Haile Selassie - Ras Tafari, seated on separate elevated thrones next to each other upon a niche, in a high roofed bare stone hall, highlighted with a sun-like yellow light from the front. Prophet Samuel (Shamil in Islam) was beside me down on the ground. They said that my "pseudonym" should be "Firesoul". Between Ras Tafari and Solomon, there was an empty throne (The throne of Jesus, since he is in line there, waiting to return). Later Solomon went for some duties, probably, towards people behind the thrones ready to serve. I accepted their wish. Samuel was the one who oiled Saul/Taul a king before David/Dawud. By the way, Ras Tafari means "Lion Head" in Arabic and Amharic. He, aka Haile Selassie Makonnen, was king, "Negus Negesti", of Ethiopia between 1930-1974. According to the Ethiopian monarchy and the "Rastafaris," he was from the lineage of King Solomon and the Queen of Sheba, a relationship so famously reported in the Bible, Quran, and the Kebra Negast which tells of Solomon and Queen of Sheba's only son Menyelek. According to Kebra Negast, Salomon had a dream that was prophetic and considered a foresee of King Haile Sellasi.

Haile Selassie was murdered by his own ungrateful folks who imprisoned this graceful and wise man who set the world on fire with his speech in the League of Nations (predecessor of UN) in 1936 saying:

This speech, the reggae singer Bob Marley made a wonderful song out of. Ras Tafari was unfortunately starved and strangled to death in prison- this man who fought and won against the Italian fascist regime of Mussolini, keeping Ethiopia free from European colonization. Many mysteries surround the death of the emperor but the conclusion is that he probably was murdered by someone previously near the military. Now this great nation with a so rich history and culture is been known for more than 40 years as the poorest country in the World and a place of struggle against famine and wars between clans, religions, and cultures. You know, all the wealth of this world will not satisfy the greed of evildoers and on the Great Becoming Day, even if they gave all the wealth of the World as payment for their crimes it will not be accepted - the worst destiny is for those who are unbelievers and think only for themselves. And no exception can be seen in man's troubled sight,- they say without exception that 1+1 = 2 always, when it may be that 1+1 = 1, for example in the fact of family life or when two lovers become one, how, when and why is it so? Instead of accepting the fate of God, they, most of the scientists become compensatory ending instead up with making exceptions to standards; just think of the laws we make in society. These are those people look up to - those who give praise to themselves and not to the true inspirational source. If this question can't be answered by the so-called intellectuals and experts, or anyone who believes himself to be God or sees Mother Nature just as merchandise or a thing to just exploit, and if they do not stop with their bad doings, they may end up with exhaustion, poverty, and wars, ironically in the development of knowledge. This was given to us to understand and not undermine Him, it seems.

These words where originally spoken in Swedish:

I found myself in an ancient, big, and splendid palace. While resting in front of a nice fountain, shaped like a flower bouquet, I saw Moses and Aron walking, with sticks, towards a Pharaoh on his high seated throne. Hearing them argue with each other, I suddenly also noticed a woman remarkably standing behind a large marble column, in secret watching and listening to them. Lying there on some couch I decided to continue my rest and enjoy the fountain in front me, as two white cobras emerged from the pool it had created. It seemed as if the pool had some odd properties. Eggs suddenly appeared from its bottom and floated up to the surface. They were eaten by the snakes, one by one, being swallowed smoothly and to my vision being satisfying. I think that the eggs symbolize the plans I had, at the time being, in my life, which were egoistic, least saying. I was weird, and instead am going to take Pharaoh's magicians, as in the Quran, as a good example to follow. In the end, I only believe in God, the Creator, the Almighty, the all-Forgiving; He says that all knowledge is of a One, that He has created me and is the only one knowing the metaphysics. Then later, one of the white cobras recommended me to follow it before it was too late.

Along with Aron and Moses came nine signs, plus one, presented to Pharaoh - attacks by spirits and insect swarms were just a part of what struck him and his people because of their foolhardiness. Why do you believe in fantasies and Superman, when Moses was for real and talked about something that seemed to be from outer space? I met Moses another time as well. I dreamed that I was on a lake, and decided to wade out into. A snake, dark in color and swift in motion, suddenly came swimming towards me from the left side. As it was about to pass me, it suddenly turned into a stick and ended its life by floating lifelessly on the comforting waves. Quickly, as the thought itself, I rushed up from the lake. Behind the shore, near a grove, and on the sandbanks three persons were waiting for me to meet. We started walking. And about to cross a small stream, on a small and meandering path, I saw Moses on the other side of it. I was eager to cross the waters to greet the great prophet. He smiled in the beginning, but his face turned serious as he wanted to show me a sign. Moses had a large and a small coin, which he put in each palm of his open hands, and then asked me if I knew which of those two was most valuable one.

Moses put the two coins in the same hand. He learned me that they were most worthy together.

In the summer of 2007, my God gave me a dream about disasters, wars, and fights between friends and families where no one listened to each other. From an unknown place, we heard a great noise or honking (like war signals of some kind) followed by a second, and people began to rise from all sides. The Day had arrived and with it also bewinged creatures and radiations of bursting lights in the sky. I got a bright shine on and around my face. But, I was frightened and started to flee the scene, stumbled, and fell uncontrollably on the sloping trail. When I was finished rolling around, my ending position resembled the Muslim prostration in payers. Two winged creatures, maybe seeing me as a true believer, gently grabbed me on each of my shoulders and helped me up. They lifted above the ground, flying higher and higher. As they started to speak, I was shown that everything from the people we used to know to the other creatures that are not recognized or are overlooked, would be collected, good as evil. They took me to a place where I learned that there were two choices - one right and one wrong.

I was then to a place, where I found myself being among three righteous, out of 30 in the group but half of them would go to Heaven and the rest to Hell. I was taken to Heaven where everything was delightful and pleasant. My huge bed, with white textiles, was placed on top of a hill, with a beautiful view, and rivers below, over a green field with no ending horizons. Around me were very good-looking, tall, and thin angels, wearing white robes. Their wings were shining with sparkling lights, looking like fresh pearls on morning dew drops. They had fans and spoke peacefully around me.

They finally listened and took me there. At first, we walked in a gray and boring dimension and then entered a damp, dark, and desolate space. In Hell, I was met by flames everywhere on a mission to chase down the fleeing deniers, who ran uncontrollably with remorse in their words. Punishers were deployed, punishing some I know, and one of these workers turned quickly toward me and asked what I was doing there, as that place was not suitable for certain persons.

I woke up with his calm voice and saw that it was half an hour to go before Friday prayers, and with a long way to the mosque. I hurried, with the belief that I would not make it, but thought, "I should try for the world and God's sake". As soon as I stepped into the Stockholm mosque the call to prayer began.

As a reporter think of how to reach the biggest audience possible. The only way actually, is if people had a sense of unity. Only then could my text be read, instead, as arguments interrupt the flow of life. The God gave me a dream once, where I, as a reporter, talked about religions, both for Muslims, Christians, and others. Then the door on the air opened, in the metaphysics. And those among the audience who had faith stepped inside with me. We enter a place and a scene which can be read in the Gospels. Jesus (Isa, Joshua, Ioshua, or whatever he chooses to be called), may he rest in peace, had in the dream gathered a bunch of people who were waiting for his preachings and miracles. We who arrived were greeted as waiting people and were assigned seats. Jesus then asked all those close to him to distribute food to the audience, which seemed to not be enough for everyone. All sat in rows and ate and were saturated, except one in my row who complained that the water was out. I did not know what to do with all the dream problems, so I talked to Jesus about it.

After that, the person became happy praised the God, and sent the cup to the next person in the row. And I praised the God of miracles and the Prophet thanked the Lord and walked in front of everyone to keep the prayer. Jesus was calling prayer as the muezzin of Islam, and he recited the Quran and based on it he explained who he was.

One of the men threw himself to the ground directly, and then we all together submitted. Now I just remember that I and Jesus were talking about something and I was inspired to believe that he lives in Heaven before he went to the lake and a boat with a few well-dressed, probably some of the disciples (this may have been the site which Islam says that he was raised up to Heaven at if he first walked on water). There was some evidence that this dream was true. Jesus turned his head to the right while his back to against the lake and during this episode he was in Bethsaida on the eastern side of Lake Gennesaret, and he turned south towards Jerusalem or Mecca (both located south of the lake) for prayer, which is a sign and proof that the dream was true.

Jesus also showed up as I believed to be a biblical form, even if not all the same, and also in other non-traditional ways. My question is why everyone has to go through fire and sea to end up seeing the same thing as what I or the Prophets tell? It is much easier and more honest to believe in what they narrated and what I now am typing, from both scriptures as in oral storytelling.

One night I had a God-inspired dream where I was in a pasture and I began to recite surah "Al Fatiha" in Arabic. While I did it, I slowly somersaulted in the air, like in flying, and landed on my feet just as the last verse was over. My dad stood and watched behind a fence with a smile. In the dream, also a serious brawl with assault as a result, between two of my friends dissolved. I had previously advised them on how to resolve the conflict and a short time after that I dreamed about this, they had become friends. I have metaphysical connections, which I seem to have received from my God, the Lord, and the Doomsday King.

In the dream, God showed me being near one screen, which I curiously approached. Unlike most dreams, this was much more miraculous, rational, and logical at the same time. When I got to the screen, I saw that it was dusty. So as I'm used to doing, I began to pull my fingers in the dust to clean it off. After two, or three moves with my fingers, the screen flashed spiritually. The screen was not turned on but the dust began to dissolve and melt together with what I had done with the hand previously. I had inadvertently written the Islamic creed, namely La ilah il Allah, which means "There is no God other than God". But after the spiritual lightning, which was a blessing (baraka), the word "Allah" was revealed as a crown where the letter Ha was envisioned as a diamond. This crown sat on a Lord King who sat on a throne, envisioned in profile. It looked as if the dust had been dissolved and the voids formed instead of a photographic-looking view. Over and under the throne, it said "Allah Akbar".

Alif (the letter A that looks like a dash) was a pen, then became a pointer, and then finally a sword. Me cleaning the screen with my fingers and that Allah gave me the "word" means I still got lucky that chose this approach to religion and that I would continue to be a reporter, and write about pure knowledge, the dust of the dirt, and return to the faith, and who knows, we might see Him in "Heavens Media". My God, Zoti, forgave my faults and gave me more metaphysical experiences. However, in an "interview" with Him, everyone got something to think about. -Matter means that I can keep myself hidden, said the God and sometimes I have perceived God as a transcendent watcher. I once asked Him, He who creates, what He was called in addition to the more traditional names, and another night I dreamed about His answers. -Allah is Fi, said an angel and showed me that even in the Arabic script. Fi in Arabic is identical to the Greek form Phi, but in Arabic meaning "in" or "within", thus continuously meaning present, everywhere, or everything.

I dreamed that I met someone who called herself the world's most famous witch and wanted to convince me of her card having power and a figure in them who could predict the future.

God gives knowledge of the religious record and the stories which are true and enriching events by the Creator. Take out a pill that can solve everyone's problems, if you can, because I believe in it, but you will see that everyone would still complain that it is not the answer to problems, and God would remain all-powerful and wise anyway. Large criticism should be directed to psychiatric care and their poor knowledge of medicine.

And what psychosis is, they can not tell. At the same time, it is so large mixtures of people in the institutions, some are sick and some are healthy and the healthy person at risk of getting sick and the sick even sicker in locked form. It is more a punishment than care. With support from pharmaceutical companies, both financially and socially or discursively they can provide support to psychologists, and also directed approach and knowledge about diseases and directed interest elsewhere. Why should the alleged doctors have the right to medicate others, but do not let the other medicate themselves, rationally saying? Medicine heals, for example, cuts, damaged neurons/brain parts, but one can never believe that something beyond God can protect or damage the psyche, if not they now want to say that they see the souls/psyche as something material! Or should all psychiatric illnesses may be seen as neurological damage? According to this institution, Psychology, everyone is crazy (in Freud's and Jung's spirit), so to avoid this respect only those who can control their madness are not seen as "sick". But if everyone is mad, would it not create panic, or should this not be questioned - the use of religious arguments in light of reductionism or scientific methodology, and remember that even when the psychologist might be crazy? In the same case, they may renounce their psychological roots in Science that most psychologists say their business comes from. And I do not deny that the disease exists but deny that the methods of most psychologists. Therefore, you must protect yourself from diseases to the best extent and help those in need of care to the best ability. In an interview with a lecturer in Psychology at Stockholm University, I was told that a newly appointed psychologist in Sweden does not get any kind of religious education at all - that is either from denominational sources or religion studies in Science, even if this topic comes up in some contexts, and with the caveat that there may be believers among psychologists. This is despite the fact that most of the patients they encounter daily are religious and have religious experiences. To not be associated with traditional religion, Psychology chose to concentrate on biology for the definition of that tradition. Yet again, instead of Psychology, it should be called something biologically and in the neurological direction instead, if not the origin is sought.

If people do not do as they should, which is to return to the religion's basic meaning and not reduce it or use it for other bad purposes, the Creator can come to replace it, humanity, with the robots having their own life and soul, and who easily "replace" man. They are like nothing I have seen before and have all kinds of sizes, designs, and tools/weapons. They can be colorful and a small robot can maneuver a larger and vice versa. Some robots were alike birds having cellular phone devices built inside, and others like the transformers, where I controlled them as a convoy. And believe me, believe the one who gave me the dream that reality is not controlled by man, and if people believe so then God will spare from any such or similar catastrophes and instead turn it into something better, without disasters of any kind, as mentioned before. He, the God is the Most Merciful! Turn around for the better - namely religion, which is, as I have shown, the only knowledge of this world unless you can come up with something better. This is the religion's message and my message. Stop accusing each other and start believing in each other instead, regardless of knowledge or belief or affiliation, because it is one of the obstacles that we can skip in the eternal path and so it will be opportunities to progress from all real and hypothetical crises. As one in Islam, I asked Allah again about how I should act like a warrior for a Creator when man in our world has worldwide mass destruction weapons?

His word is no doubt, as it may be seen in the religious scriptures and the Reportage validating that they work and holds promises. What promise do you choose to follow and keep? I forget what my family has done and after being on the wrong path, testing and manipulating reality, I came back to the God, circumcised, and prayed to my Creator. I thank God that He saved me from the so-called mental health. People make "Terminator" movies and "Transformers" movies, but why do people want the little when there's more to believe in? Perhaps I have said too little or too much, who knows, I hope that I am doing right for what I am saying, however, is the reality as I experienced it. If those preoccupied with spiritual knowledge could produce a number or symbol that could tell everything, do it because I believe in it directly. But man will see that the only thing that needs to be kept in mind is the Lord, the God, who knows all of his creation and is the only one worthy to have knowledge of. I am only a man so do not fear me but fear God rather, blessed is He who blesses. And I would ask, in the name of God and truth, that those who believe in the knowledge should not say "what fate decided" but instead say "what the Creator destined or fated" or "that determined in fate". It is also important to point out that my God is not fate, fortune, Sun, Moon, calendars, or other than Him, the Almighty, but please report the error. These dreams were just a handful, and certainly, I am going to get more, but until God sees me, these must be the foundation for later work.

All of these gifts of grace the Lord took away from me by His angels in a dream, when I asked for it. I wished that everything was to be taken away from me, but I regretted it soon afterward and asked Him to return them. My and your God gave back the blessings, when I won against demons in another dream and met (in a big city at a castle on the top of a hill) there The Holy Spirit (holding the Earth Globe in his hand and at the same time bouncing it up and down on his invisible palm, thou I didn't perceive The Spirit he said: "I see you but you don't see me and I am known as The Holy Spirit" and further said: "There is one more test, catch it if you can" and he threw the Globe to me which I, with some difficulties, managed to fetch in the end and looking at it out of curiosity, it turned into “the all-seeing eye”, whoever that is) and his Lord on a throne Who said, "so you managed to show up here in the end". May He protect my soul from the evil of metaphysics. In miss guided mainstream “Islam” the Holy Spirit is thought to be Jibreel (Gabriel), though nothing supports this idea besides some false claims from the so-called Ahadith. This would contradict the Quran in two main points: the first being the fact that the Quran in chapter Al Israa:85 states that:

So if only He knows what the Spirit is, then why are we in dispute with this created entity's attributes? Secondly, another fact that dismisses this idea is that in many verses and especially in chapter Al Qadr (The predestined) Allah says that:

You see that The God clearly separates those two, though the contra-argument is that He only emphasizes the meaning of the angels for some strange reason, according to the Sunni scholars. (And as earlier emphasized here,- the parenthesis are not part of the Quran but show the biased ideas of the translators. I usually jump through those, as the rest is mostly in accordance with the original script, if not studying the particular branch who interpreted it of course.) The thought that Gabriel is The Holy spirit is derived as a way to distance themselves from the Christian dogma of the Trinity, but just because this Spirit maybe exists doesn’t mean we are to think of it as The God, or is there anyone knowing something else? Everything you wish for you get, so do not wish harm either to yourself or someone else, unless God wants that. My method may not work for all but the consensus is that there is no point in writing religious texts, or do as I, in almost all respects relating to this publication, but the message is the important thing and not the textual, since the beauty of the scripture which Prophet Muhamed, peace be upon him, gave to us is the most beautiful book ever sent down.

God has also given me a dream saying that the "Shqipetarian" legend is true and I have had his dreams with an eagle that flew over my head and confirmed everything I wrote. In one dream, I saw my murdered cousin Haki Ahmetxhekaj, who sadly was found beheaded during the war, in 1998-1999, turning into an eagle in heaven. "I know you are born a king", he said in Albanian, while soaring across the sky above me - through green forests and parks, circulating between white palaces made out of glass and with tall towers, overlooking the magnificent splendor and bliss of the martyrs. The leader of KLA (Kosovas liberation army or UCK in Albanian), and former president of Kosova honored his death and so also the two other ones Bashkim Mehmetaj and Nimon Bajraktari from Prekë, as told earlier, who fell with him that day in summer, with graves at his memorial at his home. Many others fell and what ignited the war in the first place was the death of Adem Jashari's and Hamza Jashari's family and their own. They were guerrillas fighting the military and police and after an action and assault on the police station of their city, the Serbian armed forces responded by sending troops bombarding their homes for several days. Altogether 60 fell as victims, including infants and elderly, and the sole survivors of Adem Jashari's family where Iliriana, Shqipe, Fazli, and Marigona, who had been visiting their uncle during the fight and were not present - their given names are signs for the righteous - as we are from the Illyrians and Shqipe reminds of the victory, Fazli is a Muslim name and thou Adem and Hamza where devoted Muslims, praying the salah and following the sunnah he named his daughter Marigona which is traditionally a Catholic name - these children are a reminder of the Albanian identity. Almost 20 years earlier, in the same village of Prekazi in 1981, a similar incident happened. At that time the Serbian form of apartheid did not allow Albanians to carry weapons. The legendary Tahir Meha had a gun with him while going to the market, which the Serbian police spotted. After he refused to hand over it to them, fierce fighting began, leaving several officers shot dead, 7-9 of them, by a sole man. He then went back to his house and got his father's support. A while later a half of a battalion of Serbian military surrounded their home, shooting for 22 hours straight, killing all. Mehas cousin, son of his uncle, is, for now, my landlord who owns the house I rent. He and the victims of the massacre of Prekazi in 1998 are now resting in peace. "The black eagles", the B-2 spirit fighter jets, of NATO flew indeed over Serbia ending the war - the first time the alliance ever used weapons in a conflict. And I don't know if it's true but according to a myth, George Washington has written a letter urging future American leaders to protect Albanians in any cause. In another dream, I saw one snake tribe killing the others until there were only three tribes left, the snake, eagle, and one with no name. The leader of the "snake tribe" had a yellow snake on his hair. In the dream, I saw this tribe as being Celts and since they did wage war against the Dardanians I believe it's them. Serbia doesn't need to fear revenge since Albanians have never till now fought over words. The snake leader sat beside the eagle, and the serpent then asked:

The snake then bit its master who instantly dropped dead, in jealousy of the calm from the eagle and its wise and inspired answer, and the snake was then itself killed by me, after coming towards me with threats. Islam is a tolerant and true religion, and someone who my soul thought was Muhamed, was in a dream I had, where he was surrounded by children and preached to the adults in a mosque, while I stood outside and watched on, just after a pleasant conversation and we had, where he finally presented himself, during washing before we prayed. It seems that a date for the Day of Judgment is set up, but it also can occur before considering that horror seems to stand in the way, I do not know if any of this is true but it seems so. I wish and pray my Lord for forgiveness, rich life, and a rich soul.

I had a dream where I was at Stonehenge, England, and saw what looked like the stereotypical Druids, sacrificing humans. The Druids were a class of spiritual or cultural leaders in the Celtic religion. The only sources we have of them are from outsiders, mainly Roman and Greek, so proud North Europeans and Neopagans want to reshape the negative image written mostly from their enemies. But since they are the only sources, then what other sources are there to gain information from? What we actually do know is that it was very common to kill humans as a sacrifice, both in Celtic religion as in Norse and few dare to say different. They were probably not the ones who built Stonehenge, but they sure used it as an Axis Mundi. Excavators have found evidence of human sacrifice in ancient England as recently as of 2019. Ryan W. Miller from USA Today writes in 2019.04.15 that:

And further:

As I stood, in turn, to be sacrificed, I somehow escaped and ran into the woods. Inside the dark forest, Prophet Muhamad came saying that fighting was better if I only knew, and he made me go back with strength and fear at the same time, but all alone. Upon arriving at the rocks again, the Romans came and chased the Druids who ran and turned their backs to them and themselves. Some of them went South and some North to Scandinavia. In swamps and forests they waited for the enemy, and as the Druids thought they were safe, the Northerners, looking much as Vikings, rose from the lakes, the marshes, and myrrhs with swords and spears killing the intruders. In the same dream, I also saw Centaurs and something looking like movie scenes with actors from Hollywood.

I had a dream once, imprisoned in the Middle Ages, in a dungeon being interrogated. While they were consulting about my future and how they should torture me, I saw that the door was left open so I managed to escape. But the prison keeper, dressed in a black armor suit came crazily, equipped with sword and spear, chasing me around in "the corridors of fear and anxiety". I could hear his stomping and the metal scratching the stone floor, as he gained distance and nearly got me. But I found a washing room and hid under some clothing that was to be washed. A long time passed and I felt secure under the white sheets, only hearing myself breathe. Later, the male washers came in and started to talk about the bad conditions they had at work and in society in general, and how unjustly they were treated. All the time I prayed that they wouldn’t find me, believing they would kill me. But eventually, they lifted the sheets and saw me amid all clothes and asked me who I was. After telling them my dramatic story, they believed I was a leader and their only hope, so they assigned me as such and I accepted it. I decided that we would end the unjust system once and for all, so we gathered a lot of people, and went straight to the castle, where we believed the King resided. But the enemy was stronger, throwing fire and hot oil on us over the huge and thick walls. The day became night and at some point, I considered leaving my fellows behind to flee, but instead, I saw a building outside which was connected to the citadel, probably having an entrance to the city I thought to myself. I ordered them to invade this forecourt of the town instead and inside this fortified building was a long hall and at the end, in front of the doors leading inside the town, was a man hanging from the ceiling with a rope around his neck. The King had committed suicide, with the crown at his feet. I cut the rope and placed the King on the floor, as my companions took his crown and gave it to each other for a look. In the end, they gave it to me saying that I deserved it. As soon as I got the golden crown on my hands, a great voice came from around it chanting melodiously: “The Law of the Great”, in the Arabic language - “Al Furqan Al Aziz”. But Instead of keeping it for myself, I revived the King back to life, with first aid methods, and went to Allah with the Crown.

All languages have a connection to each other, and they are as branches of fruit-bearing trees, and this is like a small, egg-shaped universe with a center like a world tree, and have you had breakfast then you know what an egg looks like - this means fate. Thus fate is like fibers, the navel nourishing, holding together and enriching and when man dies she becomes free, like the chick that hatches from the egg. I could do the same as this, in a thousand ways, but and maybe it is so with luck - to choose something right and make one another happy. God is Phi (Fi). Here, in the world died everything, because everything dies out, this whole thing will die out, also I, but all the others as well, and the believers will still survive and have Paradise. My women in life, I have often seen in dreams in advance, they have been the memories of the past with a promise on the beautiful, future world.

Maybe I will also say that I do not know why my God has given me these dreams or this job. I've done stupid things, but I just hope my God sees me as good again. Often I ask why God chose me and my task's actual meaning. What do I know, only the Creator can see and hear the best and is the principal author of my script-like nocturnal dreams and He does not mean that this book will replace the Quran and your deeds, but rather open and confirm them only as a reminder of the truth that was, is still and will be forever and man is not flawless in this. Circumcise you, men, it increases the most in life. Not that it matters to me, besides, I can never get close to the beauty of the Quran in text form, for it is a miracle from my God to the seal of the prophets, for all peoples, nations, and people. But, listen to me all. I have not had time to write all over a thousand of my God dreams, but in 2010 and 2011, I have also seen the great crowd of Hindu figures in heaven (I got to go a parade walking between two rows of light-skinned decorated human figures in a heavenly environment with accolades and applause). And later also Ra, Isis, and Horus appeared from the walls of the Pyramids as moving images, and later they also got out of them like real beings, in golden dresses, while I was allowed to be left in peace, while someone made a sacrifice of gold, thrown with prayer in a lava stream. Ra said something to me but I couldn't remember or just don't understand what it was, while he held a spear and had a crown similar to the Pharaohs. The proof that dreams are true, at least when God says it, is that they get real in normal life. Your God says that there will be more dreams, from him to me, and more will turn true in the physical world.

After separating from a friend, my God gave me a dream where I was meditating, after a prayer, as suddenly a loud, mocking, and horrible laughter from the Devil came out of a screen. I recited some surahs from the Quran for protection (Audhobilah mina Shaitani Rajim - I seek Gods refuge from Satan the outcast), and suddenly the voice stopped as if it was choked, and I felt calmed and sure, as my world was destroyed and would be fixed by our good God, in one or another way so I continued meditating in complete tranquillity and reassurance. Well, the screen has meant a lot for man but it is bad as it is good. My dream job is to work with media or in Paradise, reporting of God. I will report, according to the God, about Judgment Day, Pharaoh, Kings, etc. All I want to do is just honor God in a good way.

Once, in the spring of the year 2009, I had a dream where I was walking in Hell with a notebook and pen in my hands. It looked like usual in Hell, dark, hot, dead landscapes with leafless bitter trees and what seemed as volcanoes in the background. There I saw a long row, consisting of thousands of people and their leader seemed to be the Pharaoh who fought against the God of Moses & Aron. He was shaved, wore almost nothing but a robe covering the most important parts, and had eyes that looked as it had all the wrath of the world, tired, red, and anguished. While I usually am very quiet, understanding, and withdrawn, in the dream I was hard in mind but soft in hearts, all objective, and went straight to the leader and said:

Besides this, I once had a dream of being in Paradise with a lot of reporters, in a broadcasting room that had the same studios as modern-day journalism offices have. All went on assignments from God but I just wanted to study the environment while also asking my self "Are everyone's deeds really written in these big screens, and will I ever work here someday, in Heaven's Media?".

Why write a story, when you can write the truth as it is, which is religion? I do not judge but argue that this text is the truth without secrets, with God the "Almighty" as counselor, teacher, and storyteller in the study of the religious practices to the acquisition of knowledge.

This night I had many many dreams, but all were nightmares. It reminded me of the time I didn't have a single good dream for three whole years, dreaming only nightmares, every single night, thinking I never would be forgiven, between the years 2015-2017, because I went bananas after to much smoking natural herbs and hurt someone The God chose for me, and ended locked up - just as the dream I had ten years earlier (in the dream I saw my self locked up, but taken care of two beautiful nurses). This is why I say over and over again that I am truly someone with dark sides no one can match, but with a good heart, no one can over-weigh, and truly The God is most forgiving the best of the merciful. I regretted my actions and cried like I never thought was possible. Not only for my sake but I felt that I had hurt all women of the world. I hope that she forgives me truly and that God also did after sending me Virgin Mary in a dream, wearing a light blue veil, smiling at me with the song Ave Maria's first strophe, with music by Franz Schubert in the background, sung by angels, inside a tear-filled cave. There, inside the cave Prophet Abraham came, somehow disappointed with my overwhelmed sorrow, with his son and lay his hand on my head and said "It's all fine", while I, kneeling before them, felt a calmness and peace inside my chest. Amid all this I was not sure that it really was her, so I thought to myself in the dream: "If this truly is Mary - mother of Christ – I will greet her with ‘salam aleikom’ and if she then answers 'aleikom salam' (peace be upon you too, in Arabic), I will know then that the dream was true. She turned to me and gave me the brightest sublime smile I ever got and to my happy surprise, she answered me back. Later, I had a dream of being drunk and wanting to marry Mary, I know it's much to ask. Since I had been drinking wine in the dream, I just couldn't ask Jesus' God for the hand of one of the best women ever to walk on this planet. According to Islamic sources Virgin Mary was so chaste that she never got married throughout her entire life. In the dream I recalled a verse from the Quran in surah 4:43:

Hope this is a joke or something. So, I got my God back and the dreams came like never before. In one of them, the Lord promised me that I would die saying "La ilah il Allah - There is no God except The God", and He said that I either will be old or a miracle will save me alive. Does this mean I am immortal? Of course not, if the God doesn't want it of course; it means He will be by my side forever. Does anybody challenge my Lord, the Powerful Creator and Destroyer of all life and existence,- the one I ask for guidance? Going forward, I dreamed that the Archangel Gabriel protected me from ill-willed men. We were three in a car, me driving and one in the front- and one in the back seat. After a debate, the one in the front pulled out a Kalashnikov and threatened us two. We quickly jumped out and ran for protection. Suddenly Allah, the God, said with a firm and reassuring voice: "Look at the mountain. Gabriel will make sure he (the ill-willed man) doesn't see you". Upon looking on the top of a nearby mountain we saw the Archangel Gabriel standing, and directing the killer's eyes which couldn't spot us, looking left, right, and back again, though we were right there a couple of feet from him. But this was not the first encounter with the angel. The first time I "saw" Gabriel was a form of personal crisis. He almost appeared to me through bright light, but as soon as he was to step forward to be shown he said: "Your heart isn't ready yet to see me". In the dream I was in psychiatric care, being busy with personal issues and men with no boundaries crashing my special space. Then later I saw Gabriel's personal seal at the Al Aqsa mosque in Jerusalem, beside the rock inside the Dome of the rock, saying that he will not come to anyone else with messages anymore. May I never make someone disappointed again and may God forgive me and all the believers and submitters of His will, ameen.

Before I tell the actual story I want to tell you who my cat is and how I came to meet her. I had a dream that I was going to get a female cat, and when I saw her among her siblings in the litter I knew she was the one, though I wanted a male and go against the dream. And good for us, all males were sold. We named her Hallali (i actually started as a joke misunderstanding...), meaning lawful in Arabic and it does not necessarily have to do with food as many thinks - it's just a word what's lawful. Her mother had abandoned her, and in Sweden they kill kittens if no one byes them. I just couldn't let that happen. A week later I did some research because of her clothing. she has three colors - light brown & dark brown, grey, and black. The only cats with this fur are so-called tortoiseshell cats, or just torties. Torties are by genetics only female and in rare mutation cases where they become male, they get big complications and are often sterile. All around the globe they are known for being the lucky cats and bringers of fortunes and happiness. Cats in general are, according to Zoology, originally from North Africa and southeast Asia. The breeds we have today are a mix of these two races. In ancient Egypt it was forbidden to export cats and killing one lead to the death penalty - a little extreme one might think but it shows the great importance it had for this culture. The ancient Greek historian Herodotus writes the following:

The Egyptians thought that cats were incarnations of Bastet, whom they adhered as a goddess. They might be cute and very cuddly, but don't go further in thinking they are a god's incarnation. But hey, maybe they are incarnations of good fortune and people, not in the sense as said in the Sanatana Dharman "Samsara" thought, but still, who knows, secretly some special spirits somehow may reincarnate as a sign of His sovereignty - since every word in life is written by the God. Among other things, they lived in the palaces of the Pharaohs and the mighty as pets. Interestingly enough the only people allowed into the sacred Islamic shrine and temple Kaaba in Mecca are Muslims and the only animals allowed to enter there are cats due to their cleanliness as this shrine is constantly washed and cleansed from dirt as from bacteria and other microbes. Muhamed had a cat, it's told in the Ahadith (The Quran and the Hadiths tells the story of one of the best women ever to have lived,- the wife of Pharaoh, who believed in Moses and Aron and got her children killed with boiling water for not obeying her cruel man. She was later thrown to her death and is probably for now in the gardens of her small home at The God's eternity and blessings, and she is an example of a pious woman, according to the book of the Prophet), though this animal is not mentioned in the Quran, there is instead a holy dog, narrated in the story of "the seven sleepers", as they are called in the Christian tradition ("sjusovare" in Swedish means "sevens sleeper" and it's a very common nickname given to persons who love to sleep long into midday). Anyway, tonight I dreamed that she wailed and meowed loudly outside my bedroom. A cat can't speak, I know, but in dreams things are surrealistic, and I at first I thought she was alone and wanted to come in, but suddenly I could understand cat language. She told me that she wanted to be in the book and tell you the situation of hers in the Swedish countryside. She continued telling me that she wanted to have kittens and then I immediately understood the problem. See, in this so-called democratic and "understanding" country, you are obligated to castrate your cat, if it's going to be outside freely. This does not mean you are forced to but it could mean reprisals if you don't follow the law. It's so bizarre that even the organization for animals rights in Sweden celebrates it and they are one of the propagators for this. Why? Is not an animal also a created being with s a spirit and feelings? The law is so cynical that it claims to be on the side of the female cat, saying they suffer delivering kittens and that there is a problem with a huge population of cats. Thirdly, they claim that owners don't take responsibility for the kittens and mother cat. We will fight for the right to have babies, no matter who people think gave them authority to judge and decide over people's and animals' private lives. Firstly, it's natural to breed and of course, cats breed more but hey, who doesn't like love and they do it because they trust us humans and that we will help them carry the burden. So, it's not the cat's fault but your selfishness. They will not breed so much if they are free and not dependent on us. Secondly, A huge population of cats is beneficial to us since they take down small prays and pest animals such as rats and harmful annoying birds,- they are not dogs who need bigger pray to survive and thus become a problem on the streets if not living naturally or with human families. Cats are independent, beneficial, and beautiful in cities. Thirdly, it's the owners who should be responsible and not the cats and the cost of keeping a cat alive doesn't exceed the cost of castrating and putting an end to their small and already short lives, and in many Muslim countries, there are small "cat hotels" where they can sleep, look after their kittens and be fed. I will let my small friend live a good life as her God intended, and let her have at least one or two litters,- the better solution if I don't want her future kittens to be confiscated and euthanized by the authorities. Many awful things have been done in the name of the good, but this doesn't justify a thing. Luckily the God is merciful and compassionate - He forgives a lot of the wrongdoings for a person sincerely turning to him. "Meow Meow".

I had a somewhat stereotypical and ambivalent dream this night. I saw myself on the edge of a barricaded bridge, as being prepared for an assault. From the horizon, I saw decorated riders coming towards the other side of the bridge. As they approached it, I could see that they were native Americans - this is what I mean with stereotypical. They wore feathers, had lashes on their clothes (the few ones they had), and were painted with war colors. I knew I was "screwed", being alone for some reason in a situation I didn't understand why I was in. The "chief" made a signal to shoot at me, sending me chilling rushes through my spine down to the feet. "I'm dead", I thought to myself but managed to shout out: "Don't shoot. I have Wakan Tanka with me!!". In the dream I got a realization, I thought "Where did I get this from? I know it's the Creator in some native language, but how come I know?" The leader raised his hand to stop the prepared archers and looked at me with a curious expression, while in the same time being repulsed at my weak action. They came confidently and slowly towards me, never letting their yes leave my next step, and we started chatting.

I hid some religious pieces and gave them the rest. From nowhere I western woman said with anger:

The Natives threw all the stuff in a big pile and lit it with fire. I could see clothes, jewelry, and weapons being burned, but I instinctively knew why. There was no need for questioning.

I heard them speak, and saw them walk around, but didn't focus on them. Instead, I looked at the beautiful decorations of the artifacts and thought about what they meant, while waking up, with people quarreling.

When we think of native Americans we often bundle them together, thinking they are all the same. It's the fact that it's the opposite that makes this kind of thinking so racist and ignorant. Wakan Tanka is actually the name of the Creator in the Lakota language. I think I've heard it in some movie or something, but when doing research I found out that it means Great spirit/mystery/God, in many native American languages from different tribes; this if something is a common denominator amongst most Natives of modern USA. The Lakotas were a tribe from the plains of Northern USA and they were the ones who won against general Custer and the ones we typically associate with natives. They used to live in tipis and hunt buffaloes and were before the great expulsion a nomadic people living from nature. Their religion teaches them to revere nature since everything is created from the Great Spirit and all had a soul. This they followed and never killed more than they needed for food, and never exploited land so it gets dead. The belief of shape-shifting was very common and especially they thought that you could change into a raven or coyote. Eagles were seen as a sign of power and in some parts of the western USA they thought that man's spirit was taken by the beak of a black and huge eagle, at the moment of death to be sent to the afterlife. For this, they were killed (and of course for the lands!). Not officially but the whites saw them as aggressive and primitive - someone in need of development and education. True knowledge comes from need and respect for God, and false knowledge is what destroys our existence. We live in days, where we will turn back to these people being deprived of their ancient roots and ask them, not only for forgiveness but for knowledge as well. From being almost 10 million natives in Northern America, there were only a couple of hundred thousand around the 19th century. They were killed and expelled from their lands. The Quran says, in surah 2:191, that persecution and expulsion is worse than killing (by the way, this verse is also used by anti-Islamists to propagate that Islam is a religion of hate, while in fact this verse only states that the oppressors started the war, killed and expelled the believers from their homes without them doing anything to start with - so now they have the right to defend themselves by only attacking the ones guilty, you understand if you read the verses before and after and not "cherry-pick" and put things out of context, that is of course). I'm not saying that I know indigenous people or that they were all saints,- they had some ideas that were a bit extreme, for example,- the extent of use of black magic and the worship of lesser spirits, but it does not justify expulsion, murder, and theft. We must learn from the mistakes of our stupid-minded forefathers and the knowledge of our honorable ones.

Sometimes dreams are so real you think it's happening and sometimes they are so surreal that you think that even reality is something that could be fake. But the dream I had was more a deliberately told tale. It was seated in 15th or 14th century Europe, following a master and his two serfs. The thing that makes this dream so special, except the sense moral of course, is that it had a melody throughout its whole length. It was played with flutes and a ding-a-ling music box, and it had a cynical and ironic tone to it. Though the story had a dark background, the melody itself was happy to force us to understand that evil does not always come with darkness but is sometimes disguised. Anyways, one of the characters was a young man and the other a blond and beautiful young woman. They were in the power of a man traveling from city to city, reading books and stories to the crowds who paid to be mesmerized with wonderful tales of love, mythological creatures, and comic incidents. The girl and the boy had the job to play the stories as they were told by their old master, and collect money from the public.

And the melody playing in the background... One day they were on the way to a new town, as usual, traveling through an open oak forest on a wide and dry dirt road. The wagon was filled with books and goods and it seemed it would tip over at any moment. The weather was fine, but the girl was upset. She had been chained for being disobedient and cocky and this happened sometimes to the serfs of old times if they went against their lords. And the melody playing in the background...

She picked the lock of her chains and took the book. Until now I didn't know what "the book" was, but a voice said: "This is the book the old storyteller shows to catch the attention of the crowd before he reads the rest to gain his earnings, but no one can understand it and read it except the chosen one", as a narrator of this bizarre but thoughtful tale. While preparing to jump off the carriage, their master heard her and tried to stop her, but she kicked him off so he fell and hit the ground, crushing his skull upon his violent fall. The blood quickly got absorbed by the dry yellowish dirt, only making a small spot. And the melody playing in the background...

She ran of with the book and went straight to the nearest town, opened it, and started to try to read it. But she couldn't understand what was written and instead just made up a story. It was more the cover that brought the attention,- and sure enough, people quickly came to gather. One in the crowd, a bald, fat, and old man, had a different plan. After her show, he offered her a chest with gold and jewelry, if she came home with him for a private reading. Young and naive as she was, she accepted his devious offer, little knowing that her old friend, the boy she used to travel and have fun with, had knowledge she didn't have. In the same moment, as she came inside of the man's house, he forced himself on her, ripped off her clothes, abused and raped her, with her screaming and crying for help. And the melody playing in the background...

Meanwhile, the boy came to the same town and the screen switched from the horrors of the house to the man's yard, where he had laid and later forgot the book,- which he wanted in the first place. The boy, without knowing that his late friend was being chained for her second time and in worse hands just a couple of meters away, saw the book, which he immediately recognized, and went to the town's center with it. As soon as he opened it, his mouth started to read it, as if he always knew it upside down. People rushed to him and joyfully cried, because they knew what they heard, as an old story of theirs said, according to this curious narrator of the dream: "There will come a man reading the book to you, so you can understand it and when he comes, make him your leader". The crowd lifted him up and sung songs of old and chose him to be their king. The scene then went back again to the girl being raped, with the ugly old man laughing and saying: "You're mine forever". The promised chest of gold became a coffin for a body cold. And the melody playing in the background...

It ended tragically for the lady while it could have been a nice tale about true love and compassion instead. Didn't she know that the guy had a secret crush on her and that their old master was going to naturally die soon and would probably, since he didn't have children of his own, give his carriage with the wealth and books to them? Don't do like her. Having patient in all situations is my interpretation of this melancholic fairy tale of the God.

Right now I'm deep in the forest, camping and studying for my "hunting degree". It's very cold I must say, ice, snow, and frosty nights. But I've passed the theory test and have only the shooting left in a couple of days. What does this have to do with religion, some might wonder? To be very including,- everything has to do with religion, according to me. Is it morally ok to hunt and kill wild animals, living in the free? Is it really ok to eat meat? These are moral questions and to understand the purpose of life, you need to be just and equal to all living beasts of the Universe. It's this paradox - to respect life but at the same time have the right to take it, when you feel it's for a righteous purpose - which makes hunting a religious topic. I agree that it is a controversial one and no one should have the right to just go bazurka and kill when feeling for it. There have to be morals and ethical rules to the tradition of hunting and killing for a living. For those who do not know what morals and ethics are, you can understand this by seeing moral as the measurement whereupon we measure man's character of being able to judge between right and wrong and ethics is the teachings of morals or the school of morals. Many argue that ethics is the primary teachings of religions, for example, the golden religious moral rule "treat others as you want to be treated your self" is so fundamental that it exists in most if not all traditions. Now, nobody wants to be killed, so why kill? The simple answer is - it is legal and morally ok to kill for justified purposes as to survive or save other lives. Everything is not black and white or night and day, sometimes it's evening or dawn or just grey and it's hard to decide if grey leans more to white or to black or if dawn is nearer night or day. We need to take our paths and make our actions hoping we are doing the right thing and winning Eternity. I had a dream where I saw pollution in the forest and The God said "To hunt is to pollute nature". In the dream, I tried to clean the pollution, interpreted by me as me trying to justify why I'm taking a hunter's degree and license, but still, there was pollution no matter how hard I tried to clean. I don't regret my decision though, just because it's dirty business doesn't make it wrong or illegal, or morally incorrect. God then showed me in the dream how He had collected all the pollution in the same pile - meaning that hunting should be practiced only by a group of people, and then be thoughtful of how to take life when to do it, and understand why life exists. I hope you understand that I probably never will kill a wild animal, but my interest in nature and bush-craft was so huge that it was an inescapable decision. I've learned how animals live, eat, populate, sound, leave tracks, etc.- knowledge very important if you want to come close to their souls. Remember that the Worlds biggest crimes has also been done by vegetarians and in contrast, we must know the life after death as a reality and stop killing others for fun, greed, complacency, or showing off, as we are created just as with the same main purpose - to thank and show devotion to our Lord for giving us life and providing for us each day. The meat- and fish industry must stop and go. Those who buy meat in stores are not carnivores, they are scavengers eating other's meat (as the teacher here in the forest said), and if you want to eat fish - go fish yourself and stop destroying the seas. Not saying that selling meat or fish should be criminalized, but considering the modern methods and equipment we have today, we must redefine the ethics regarding large food industries. He, the God is self-sufficient, in no need from anyone, but we are in need of Him,- He is the Creator of all and the Most Merciful.

Sometimes my humbleness becomes too much. But I'm scared that my God warned me instead of reassuring me. In each case, you can be sure that God can do whatever He wills. Tonight I dreamed that I and a friend, which I've never met before, were in a huge sports hall with different sports practiced by many people. We got to meet a tennis pro and I introduced my friend as a promised one in the game, but that he might need some extra advice for his career. The pro then succeeded to teach us how to properly hit a ball. But I was not sure that he taught us right.

When he finally was finished I got to ask him. I've had observed that he kept his arm close to his body when hitting the ball and it didn't look ok to me. So I wanted to know if he did that when playing professional games as well?

I was puzzled over why he didn't tell that from the beginning but thought to myself that he probably wanted to teach other stuff, so he didn't give that technique bigger importance. We then wandered around and I saw a golf ball hanging on a wall which got my attention so I picked it up. The pro gave me his golf club and said that I should practice. But the golf ball turned into a candle and from nowhere I suddenly heard and saw people dancing and singing to religious-inspired music, in different strange languages.

Now, I don't know if it's for something good or evil, and I'm very sorry if I did something bad again. I have done some not smart stuff so I constantly walk as if there were pine cones scattered all over the ground, being barefooted. I've committed all sins, except for two,- murder and idolatry, hopefully forever. Speaking about that, I had another dream as well tonight. I woke up with sleep paralysis. I could see my room but was strangely enough still dreaming, hearing my children cry and my love coming to me. God then said: "This is what your loved one felt, she had a similar dream about you". I couldn't move, just thinking of how much I loved them and wished that I would be forgiven. I commanded my soul to go back to sleep since I didn't want to wake up. I instead wished I would meet them again. This is the first time I've experienced sleep paralysis. Why it happens is a mystery but the conclusion is that the body wakes up but the mind is still in REM-sleep,- they do not synchronize as normal but to me, it's a reminder that we will be conscious even after we leave this world. The afterlife is surreal as a dream but the experience of it will be as we lived again.

Sometimes you go through some stuff you don't wish even your enemy to suffer. I'm not alone in having issues so maybe my sad story can give new perspectives to other's hard times. This night I dreamed of seeing myself saying to some random persons: "When people are having troubles and ask God for help, they instead thank themselves when the problems resolve, saying 'My hard times are over because I'm smart'. Or, when the God takes away some things He gave to them before, they say in despair 'God doesn't exist'". A bright woman in an office turned her head towards me in interest and some guy agreed to say: "That's so true". I left them all and went for my business, before waking up and realizing I'm being tested myself. To the story then. As I've told you before, I've had some dreams of my children before they were born. But the story starts with Lumnie, their mother. Before meeting her I was in love with a younger woman than myself. God, this is awkward to speak about but I'm honest so I lay my cards open on the table.

In a dream I saw myself fist fighting three guys coming out as a winner and seeing her watching it all. I said to her: "If God doesn't exist, I will destroy and create the world myself". But realizing that only He, the God can do such a thing, I regretted my words. "Only God can destroy and fix the world", I instead said when in the same moment the sentence was finished the world blew up and was remade again. When the dust was laid down we were holding hands, looking in each other's eyes. I woke up and realized I had feelings for her but knew that it would be impossible to get her. A couple of days later I was at a mosque with her, her sister, and my cousin. There we met three guys who argued that Muslims should believe in all the Ahadith, while I was arguing that all couldn't be true and that we only can be sure that the Quran is complete and revealed from prophet Muhamed's God. The argument ended with me saying that they could believe in whatever they wanted and I will believe in whatever I want, regretting to have fought against them. To make the story even more strange, the reason the four of us were together in the first place was that the girl I was in love with actually wanted me to meet another girl, named Liridona, who she thought would be nice for me to see. But I wasn't interested in her since she didn't believe in God, and that would be a problem in the future I thought. To be honest, I never wanted to meet her anyway, although she was a very nice and good-looking woman. I just wanted to have a moment to ask the one I had feelings for a chance. At first, she wasn't interested but I convinced her that I was serious. Long story short, we never went further due to her family and my family and confusing incidents.

I had instead a dream where I saw myself wandering through the city tossing the rings away at a memorial for martyrs and going to a house that will have significance later. I saw Lumnie Kuqi's father and later herself in front of me with her dark, straight, and long hair. She was rather tall and slim and I became mesmerized by her darker mysterious eyes. But as a child, she was blond, as I was though my hair was more albino-like. Albania means land of the white in Latin from the word "alba" and most of the children born from us are blond till they reach maturity, so also mine. The flag of Serbia, on the other hand, has a white double eagle, though they do not identify as us - it's instead an Orthodox Christian symbol, since Byzantine times from Constantine who surely was from the Illyrian tribe of Dardanët and who made Europe accept Jesus' path. I suggest you understand what the legend of the Shqiptarë teaches you, so embrace it, for your god Boga sends words of reconciliation if you go back to understanding. All fine if apologies are said and then we find each other together. To turn back to truth is the hardest struggle, and the winners will be the wise. But "It doesn't matter if you are black or white", the king of pop Michael Jackson, as all are familiar with, sang. Suddenly she turned into a huge black cobra, biting me on my right foot. Instead of fleeing, the snake came crawling towards me. I lifted my foot up to stamp on its head but when I saw into her eyes I saw a soul and got compassion instead, so I let her move one. Her father said: "I didn't know it would be like this". I ran with fear and desperation into the woods screaming out "I'm going to die, I'm going to die. I've been poisoned, I'm going to die". But from nowhere, flowers and herbs started to grow under my feet, healing me. I jumped so high in the sky of joy and happiness that I could die having felt such a nice thing. I heard a stream in the background and saw myself in this lush garden when suddenly a voice said: "We have found a river for you". Lumnie means river and happiness in Albanian and the name is like the sister name of Fat. Luck and happiness are something man always strives to feel and it's only a few chosen ones who gets this gift. I woke up not being sure what to think or feel, but I was frightened at the same time being full of joy and strength after having a broken heart before. My family and friends felt for me and had a plan for me to meet a woman, they said. But I wasn't interested. I never liked arranged marriages and especially after God's twist of fate earlier. But after long days of persuasions, I finally gave up. I kind of liked her name. We decided to arrange a date and when we arrived at her house my body froze. "This is the house in my dream", I thought to myself, wanting to turn back thinking it's some voodoo stuff going on. Her father opened the door and greeted me and again I couldn't believe that I was seeing him just as he looked like in the dream I had, before even knowing they existed. His appearance is hard to go by with a short body, brown hair, and a strange comforting face, always smiling. And there she was, having her back turned against me, standing in the living room. She suddenly turned herself towards me and pierced me with a rude but beautiful and very proud look in her eyes. "Hi, I'm Fatmir Ahm...", I said without being allowed to finish. "Hi, Lumia", she responded quickly and politely. It didn't take more than a couple of weeks of dating before we hooked up and decides to live together. We got married and she moved to Sweden to be with me.

Now as we all know, love couples often get children, sooner or later. Our first child is Femermira Marigona Julia aka Mira. Femer means woman and Marigona means "born like Mary". Lumnie had a dream where she was told that we would have a son and name him John. But when she told me this I instead became very sure that it was the work of evil. I was very confident that it would be a girl so I used to sing on her belly with what I believe was a somewhat annoying song: "Hajde hajde qika, hajde hajde qika, qika qika qika, hajde hajde hajde". "Q" is pronounced "ch" as in chick. It means "come come girly, come come girly, girly girly girly, come come come". I also had a dream later which convinced me further. Me and Mira were waiting for the bus and I looked at her as if I knew her. The bus came and we went in. There we met two females who introduced themselves and greeted Mira. "This must be little Mira?", they asked her and she modestly nodded. The dream placed itself in my subconsciousness and the days went quickly by. I remember the night she was born. It was a full moon and the nightly spring weather was calm. No cars on the road and in silence and tranquillity we drove to the hospital. I never felt such calmness in my whole life as far as I can remember. It was just the two of us, God and the coming girl. Days came and went and no name could we come up with. One day as I was writing on my book, I heard my mother and sisters call her Mira. They had decided without me knowing it. "What did you call her?", I asked with an exhilarated tone. "How could I forget the dream?", I thought to myself, since she is the only one with her name. In the Quran it's told that Mary's mother also believed that she would have a son but when she saw it was a girl she asked God to protect the infant from Satan and gave her the name Mary. My son's birth, on the other hand, was far more dramatic. I used to work late so I slept most of the morning up to ten a clock. That night I had a dream meeting Muhamed at the library of Laholm, the city we live in.

He wrote three straight vertical lines and in the first one, he put two small diagonal ones on the top. I woke up, happy having met him, and rushed to pray. I took the Quran and randomly opened it. The chapter "The star" came up and after reading it I prayed, smelling the breakfast from the kitchen. But just after the first bite of the delicious eggs, her water broke and since I recently had sold my car we called my sisters to drive us to the hospital instead. It was panic all the way since he was about to come out real quick. His head was actually visible while in the car and it didn't take more than a couple of minutes and he was born. I actually forgot to tell you that I was traumatized when Mira was born, seeing labor and her being delivered, so I decides to go old-fashioned and wait in the waiting room when my son was born. Instead, my sister, who is a nurse, went with Lumnie, which by the way never gave a sound during the whole time, with both labors. She never screamed and showed only a little agony and I never met a stronger woman than her, having fought during the war. As a child, she was marching with the guerrillas to be escorted to another place but ended up with them in the middle of the war for almost a year. Anyway, after half an hour or so, at 12.00 a clock midday, my sister came out and said: "congratulations, you have a son. He shines with light. Can we name him Yll?". Immediately when she said that I remembered the dream and what Muhamed had written. I never felt so sure of anything in my life. Yll means star in Albanian, by the way. And this is how they came to be.

I used to abuse narcotics, experimenting with magic and God knows what, which led to temporary psychosis. Now, I haven't seen my family for a long time and life feels meaningless and dark. It was not an aggravated assault but it had serious consequences and I begged to receive care for my abuse of narcotics, which now I'm glad that I got! Some may say it's my own fault, and it's my belief as well, but on the other hand, I think that it's a test and that God planned this from the beginning. I and Lumnie were bound to hurt each other and now I have faith in Him, who sees and has all in His hands. Some might say that all these are lies, or that it's just symptoms of a decease, wish full thoughts, or that I've been smoking too much dope and it's all just imaginations. But if that's the case then I've debunked religion and if someone believes that it's all an expression of drug abuse, then why don't you take drugs to see the spiritual world, angels, or God? God will test you as He has tested me, and I regret what I did and I know that He is wise and kind. Now, what is the purpose of all of this? How will I react? If God gives my loved one back, will I thank Him? Or, if He changes my life and I lose them, will I stand firm in my beliefs? Praises and thanks to Him who has sovereignty in His hands and whose power encompass all,- He who always forgives the regretted heart. The God is The One I put my trust and hope in.

I was sitting on a park bench with Mirza (means royal prince in Arabic & Urdu), an old friend of mine, "chit chatting" about life and old times, when an elderly lady with a companionship of many other people accused me for not studying as I should. I said:

I was never the less taken to a court and one of them, "the big fish" lied and denied doing so by continuing eating and only thinking of his meal. But I simply looked at them feeling tired of the judgments, thinking of Joseph and his time in prison, so I was left to leave to my special room. I almost forgot this dream after waking up, but realized its importance in seeing knowledge available in all situations. You don't need to go to big schools and have great grades to know the truth. From God we came and multiplied and one day will be going back to Him again.

Sometimes God wants to assure that we follow Him alone and act righteously. In a very short but grasping and horrific dream this night I woke up in a city in war, being ruined by fire and rage. I stood in the center of this unknown but yet familiar place. It was not that I knew where I was but it seemed like any major city in general. In the center where the administrative buildings and the main one had a dome which was burning to the ground by fire from within. It was dark and smoke arose from the streets surrounding the whole town as showing who did this - the evildoers of hate and ignorance. The glass dome was lit by the fire making it look like a torch of despair and fear. Everything was literally burning in this, a day ago, wonderfully looking town. And I saw an eagle made out of stone in front of me inspiring me to understand that what is important is not what we got but Who gives it to man. This statue of the bird had a closed mouth and stood erect having a brusque look as trying to show power. And I was convinced that the World is constantly imprisoned by the ego's wish for always having more and that one day everything is going to be judged in accordance with our ideas, words, and actions. But with calm for some mysterious reason, I also understood that truth will succeed to convince that even in calamity we have the strength to overcome desperate situations. The God then came from above, though i really couldn't see Him, and said the following, with a warning:

I listened to Him and understood that most eagles, masonry stones, and pride can't tell the truth, and either can they recreate the World when it is annihilated. I think God wants men to abandon the worship of created objects which can't create themselves and even if they do, could they ever stop a day when all matters will be settled? I believe He wants to urge you to not worship that which itself is Created, and instead we say: we believe in Him who gives and understands us.

I dreamed that I was hiking in the Himalayas and struggled against steep mountains and cold thin air as a storm came and released an avalanche. I hid behind a cliff and waited out the storm. Soon as the wind laid down I began the hike again but this time the obstacle was a giant who I with cunning succeeded to win over so I could continue. Suddenly I had a bird's eye view and the range looked smaller than one would think from above its majestic reaching tops. Coming to a high altitude valley upon the mountain, situated between four tops I saw a monument, a dead horse, and Alexander the great's grave beside it, in complete desolation. I felt humbled and thought to myself: "So many have tried this, and all will lose something to win the other thing they were destined to obtain". The low lands were just behind one of the tops and I climbed down towards the warmth of the weather and social human bonds. Waking up, I didn't really think that Alex's grave would be there, but who am to know the unseen and it could just be a metaphor. Maybe he is buried in a valley surrounded by mountains?

I've actually been to the Himalayas for real. In Kathmandu, they have mountains of 4000+ meters surrounding the area, and yet 7000-8000m pointed and ice glazed iron-hard rocks stand as proud heads looking down on their kin to protect those below. We had decided to see Mt. Everest from Nagarkot at The Chandragiri mountains. To many's surprises, you can see the Worlds tallest Mountain from Nepal's capital Kathmandu. We bought equipment, supplies, and a map and headed for Shivapuri, the highest top there, thinking it would have shelter since the map showed guest-houses and restaurants. Little did we know that the map was from the 1960s and the building had for long been deserted. It was a civil war in Nepal during this time and the state military fought against Maoist guerrillas in the forests of the high lands. We sometimes heard gunfights and military dogs running around. "What am I doing here?", I thought to myself feeling I had abandoned my life for an experience and ambition. We reached Shivapuri before sunset and my jaw dropped out of disappointment when all we saw was ruins of planks and concrete, realizing we were going to struggle hard this night and the fact that a cold cloud came in embracing us with old mysteries and fear of the coming did not make it easier to grasp. Shivapuri is famous for being a retrieval home of the Sadhus and Sannyasins who follow Shiva, who is believed to have meditated in this area, holding a trident, having a cobra around his neck, and often smoking Ganja, Marihuana, which is said to have originated here. "Are we going to survive this night?", I thought to myself while looking for firewood. But it didn't take more than a couple of seconds until the cloud made us completely wet and the ground covered with the misty water was also hidden by the dark of the coming night, making it scary to grip sticks, and if one of them moved you knew you had a cobra in your hand. From the mist came an odd-looking figure, not more than a 7-year-old child in height, having dreadlocks, wearing orange clothing, and having prayer bands from beads around his neck. He looked like a relic from the past or Yoda himself, being around 100 years old. Though he couldn't speak English he signaled us to follow him and showed us how to chop wood, using a small ax. We were taken to his cave situated on the cliffside of The Chandragiri range, from where we saw the over 7000m higher tops, just as I thought you couldn't go higher. A Picture is said to tell more than a thousand words, but my eyes had a thousand images and one word in mind - wonderful. God is the one who shows us His might and wonders so we can think and understand. The day after we left and continued to Nagarkot, but we lost track and without food, we soon run out of power. One night we simply collapsed and covered our cold limbs with grass, thinking this could be the last breaths we take. The sky had no light pollution and the air was very thin so the Milky Way looked as what it is - a ring of a Galaxy of sparkling lights guiding our paths for navigation. I didn't know that the sky could be so wonderful and bright at night before I saw it from those heights and desperation for survival. From nowhere came flashlights and three persons, who had seen us lying there, took us into their shelter. The Chandragiri is inhabited by small villages but some of these natures places are hostile towards inexperienced westerners. The Nepalis are generally smaller than us, but at the same time, much stronger and can with ease climb these mighty mountains. I felt like a fish on dry land. The host gave us warmth and food and the next day we were guided by his friendliness to Nagarkot. He made a simple gesture and pointed to it. Sagarmatha or Mt. Everest was like the other tops and quite impersonal when being side by side with her sister tops. We saw Varanasi, The Bubaneshwar temple, The Murdeshwar temple, Aum Beach Gokarna, Kurukshetra field, Agra and its jewels, Pushkara and Rajasthan and after this, I continued the path to the God. The Macedonian Alexander reached this subcontinent in his 20s and it became his early fall, but his legacy remained for 300 years, from Alexandria in Egypt to the Seleucid empire and his wast empire influenced many religious areas in western India such as the Indo-Greek kingdom who's Greek ruler Menander, Milinda in Pali, became one of Buddhism's most admired persons. Milinda's legacy also influenced Ashoka to turn from cruelty to instead embrace Ahimsa and become a Buddhist. But the secrets of the High, I do not know. All I say is what I know. We will understand everything when we lay down and look up to return back to our original Maker.

I had a dream a long time ago and since it was very consistent, and short I didn’t write it down but I believe it has an important message although.

Personally, it doesn’t matter how good you are in word-weaving but what matters is that the message is presented so all can understand it and also retell it with the same effort. But some times things are very complicated and a language has some limits to what it can tell, and do not misunderstand me but in a way, we also must accept that words can have multiple meanings and give perspectives which the logic and “the self” cannot fully grasp until they manifest in reality and particular situations through personal experiences. God is complicated but yet He has given us simple signs of His existence so we can love and get close to our Creator, but most of us are ungrateful and ignorant, though it should quite be the opposite of course. And in regards to why I think it’s God who speaks in my dreams, I actually can’t give a simple answer other than in my dreams my soul knows it is His voice and His sound is unique to me – like a sound-code which can only be heard by those whom He gives this access to, so maybe I’m mad or my self is making up this in my head, who knows? But even so, considering the special kind of presentation the dreams have I would not consider my self be so important or wise as He is, who in one simple line can tell what our souls ponder around and guide us to an eternity of bliss and happiness.

This night I dreamed of meeting a sister of an old friend and asked her if she was in a relationship. I know for a fact that she does and she even has children but it seemed that was asking in the past.

I looked at her dark eyes and saw her longing and hopefulness and wished she would become happy. One big mistake many do before getting married is not being prepared. To love one another is just one part of it. But honestly, if there is not enough income it becomes hard to get along. And in a society where almost all capital is loans and owned by banks, this issue is nagging in the subconscious of many couples. Instead of encouraging the youth to work hard for ten or more years, living cheap but not harshly, so they can save money to buy a house, you tell them to "live your life", "have fun", "you only live once" etc. But honestly, the best advice would rather be to say "you only live once, so be righteous and straight, and work hard,- fun comes later, we promise". When you waste money for buying drugs, alcohol, sex, fashion, and whatever, you quickly become both materially and spiritually drained, and getting back is not a fun story, I can testify. You should live your lives at full, but not be wandering as a stray dog, begging for a bone and lukewarm water. God will reward those whose aim is for the metaphysics and the hereafter, and there one will have sex, wine, and fun with friends for eternity, and not for a brief and pointless time as in this worldly existence - this is a promise by our Lord which I hope will be fulfilled.

If you believe in the Creator then you must also accept the hard and contra personal choices you sometimes have to make. In this night's dream, I was small talking with three Muslims as we suddenly saw a commotion near us. Two women were conducting in Magic and my first reaction was to be harsh towards them and seek the God's protection against Satan, but God made me accept that what they did was His will and instead I asked from Him protection for those witches:

The witches then approached us with joy and calmness and proceeded with their tricks. Their first one was a peculiar one. One of the ladies drew string out of her mouth and it levitated in the air between her hands.

The second trick was similar. The same witch drew a feather-like object out of her mouth and it shone with pearls hovering and being illuminated from the feather's nerves. The other witch drew her hands above, under it, and on the side of the "feather" to show that nothing was holding it and that it was in the thin air. The one making the Magic looked at us with humbleness.

I still am puzzled, since Magic is so different from traditional religion, but even bizarre actions can be allowed in desperate or exceptional times and places. May we all have patience and see the light from God, even if the dark covers our inner soul and even if our selves are struggling in hard and contradictory times.

What is God's real name, I now wonder? What do religions believe, or is there a scientific answer as well? Jews think His name is yet not revealed, while Sunni Muslims are waiting for a messianic-type figure called Mehdi to initiate "The World Peace", and also to "declare" the 100th name of God. One method in Muslim meditation, as discussed earlier, is to sit on a kind of Zen-Buddhistic position, on the knees, and chant all the names of Allah,- the 99 of those revealed in the Qur'an. Meditation holds vital importance in the Islamic prayer ritual (Salah), which also incorporates rites such as bowing (like Jews do), then prostrating with the forehead on the ground, continuing with the kneeling position (Jathya), and lastly meditating - "Dhikr". Thus, "Salah" is a type of incorporating or comprehensive prayer ritual, and it would be to reduce the meaning of the performed actions by simply referring to it as just being "prayer". Meditation is, by the way, a relieving ritual, that can lead to metaphysical high conscious states with the reward of tremendous satisfaction. Similarly, the 108 names of Shiva are, in Shaivism, thought to be the best mantra to meditate by, and also by chanting "Rama Rama Hare Hare" (Rama is thought of being an incarnation of Vishnu), the Vaishnava believe that "Moksha" (freedom from Samsara, the suffering of being reborn) is attained after death. Dreams, being so enigmatic in mysterious shapes, somehow most often lead my mind and conviction that they, as proofs of the reality of an afterlife, serve as means of guiding our thoughts, speech, and action in the best way. They can also show us what our God has planned for each person's self and soul.

On this particular night, I dreamed of meeting Vishnu and his ten avatars. I saw the Brahman hovering above the ground, in what seemed like a meditation pose, and having the so-called Avataras around him. Suddenly and above him, from behind his back "Sheshanaag" appeared. "Sheshanaag", or just "Shesha", is the multiheaded serpent believed to be coiled around the Universe and who also rests above the Primordial Waters of the World. Usually, it's visioned as Vishnu resting on this serpent, having his many heads as protection above him, but in my dream, I instead saw the Brahman submitting this mythological snake. I prostrated, and so did a Post-Salafi-Muslim fellow whom I only once briefly met in real life. Suddenly, all the avatars manifested a macho-type behavior, showing me a fierce power by approaching with drawn swords & spears, and placing them around our necks to test if we would hesitate in worship. But we continued to pray. At the sight of the prostration, they became even more furious and started to cut off our hair, to see if we would get scared enough to end our submission. But we gently continued our business. In the center of "the gang of avatars", Krshna now stood, glowing with a blue, yet not true color, trying to deceive us from the Lord’s guiding voice. Still, the continuation of the devotion didn't end. I just ignored Krshna's "charming smile" and quenched light, which only glowed inwards & towards him, not even close to reaching my soul. His face became saddened, and the yellow of his jealousy was almost oozing. I had completed the task. Turning towards the Brahman I asked in fright if I could get to know him more deeply.

I now saw, in the dream, a new scene. A spiritually divided India was instead being shown to my vision. People were contesting the truth with different religious challenges to see who was on the right path. One prayed to an idol and other made-up names,- humans who used to live before or demons who people came to view as a gods. But, this idol worshipper didn't get his wishes replied. Another person prayed to the Lord of the world - Bhaga in Sanskrit - and got on the other hand her wishes granted. And so it went on and on, with people competing in prayers and worshipping different Lords. After a while, the losers of this unique sport suddenly turned into monkeys, fleeing in hordes. Some of them planted a tree in the middle of this religious arena whose branches were leafless and thin,- the tree of Daesh, more commonly known as ISIS in the West, as this name seemed inscribed on the bark. The hypocrites had also written the names of different Western cities on the branches of this tree, and I now knew they were up to something no good.

Is Brahman or Bhaga the true God? Just by referring to the Creator with the Germanic word “God”, I actually indirectly answered this question! Bhaga means “lord” or "the good fortune" in Sanskrit, so therefore it would, of course, be a denial to not refer to Allah as Bhaga or the Brahman - the unborn, omniscient, and unseen Creator. God has maybe, or maybe not, a personal name or a special soundwave pattern on which people can meditate (as some in Hinduism think), but to think one reaches the Highest by only pronouncing sounds has fallen into the trap of ignorance and laziness. It would be self-deceiving to try to reach God by dishonest and perfunctory rites. Sound is vibrations whose effect causes the environment to behave in reflection to the appeared. If there are sounds whose characteristics are of supernatural kind, I don't know.

This is what Jesus said to the Pharisees as their hearts were inclined towards the worldly and not to the purpose of loving God and following His words. The same story as before is also now being repeated by the Sunnitic, Shi'itic, and Ismaili groups. I've been taught that the God has warned us about many types of destruction, but that He also is forgiving and wise. So, personally, I don't know if or how He will make us understand, but be sure, it will not be as you assume or believe.

And so also goes for those who bow down to other than the Lord of the World and those who are indifferent or live in denial. Ask the God for forgiveness and turn to His Love in devotion and admiration. Honestly, religions are not there for God, rather He teaches men by words and His marvelous signs. The God doesn't need anything. You are lost and instead in need of His guidance. Therefore, I strongly argue simply. For example, if you would just understand the meaning of the word "God", you would come to an understanding and hopefully instantly believe. And finally, I hope you all come to know my Lord and God, the most powerful and forgiving Creator, before realization comes without foreboding at the time predestined, and when gone will be both mind and house.

If someone thinks I have a schizophrenic paranoid disease, I can reassure that it's not the case. The God showed, in the latest dream, me being in a sports hall with some old acquaintances, while I was standing as a goalkeeper, and I got inspired to say:

I got a surprising receiving. The others felt annoyed, jealous but yet positively nodding in confirmation to the truth in those words I said. I then went around all and sat down and started being sarcastic and imitating psychotic and delusional persons who follow commanding or commenting "whispers":

See, I sometimes hear some with envy, hatred, and ignorance calling me a thing or another. But to me, it's a mystery that I'm still alive & in good shape and I thank Him who is All-mighty for always looking out for my soul, mind & self, and body. I don't judge anyone and I will not sentence humans since it's not what a reporter does, but I shall say that if the God wishes to give me something good I can only say it's from Him and hope for better, and that all can see His might and word as I do. He, the Maker and the Blessed seems to wish to be admired and acknowledged for life and the sustenance He gives.

Humans have existed for thousands and thousands of years and during these time lapses, we have developed abilities to survive and understand the environment in which we live. It is an evolution of technology and the categorization of this process is mostly accepted. In the beginning, we used stones, then we melted metals, later we used gases or fire to create power and lastly we try to control the so unpredictable paths of electricity & electromagnetism. If you know some physics, you can see that which I observed this day,- that these four stages also correspond to the four stages which matter goes through. The four stages of matter are solid, liquid, gases, and plasma. Plasma is developed when gases ionize and become electrically charged and is a process which most matters go through. Stars are made out of plasma and they are ignited when the particles become both positively and negatively charged in gases, creating a super-hot matter. Ionization occurs when electrons are stripped out of an atom, making it positively charged. So, while other atoms in gas thus become negatively charged, the positive ions and the negatively charged electrons create a super hot matter called plasma, as the electrons are torn from negativity to positivity with fierce energy. Anyway, in our age of so-called modern times, we can create plasma and also convert different types of natural energies to electricity which have use of in daily life, as we already know. If this evolution is logical, we maybe can also assume the fifth, sixth and seventh state and so one and if so then also its form will be assumable. My personal belief is that the last phase matters undergo is from quantum to metaphysics and thus going back to the purposual start, creating a cycle. At this time, the fifth stage of matter, is believed by scientists, to have been achieved and is a form of condensation, called the Bose-Einstein condensate, BEC. It's a way to cool gas so the atoms lose all energy and act as a single molecule or atom. The first manmade Bose-Einstein condensation was created in 1995, cooling down bosons (quantic subatomic particles such as photons which is what light is made of, while other subatomic particles as electrons are called fermions, and fermions are furthermore divided into two subcategorized forms "quarks & leptons", - bosons and fermions are the smallest yet known quantum particles constituting all matters, from electrons to atoms, to molecules, to cell, to matter and so on) to Absolute 0 (− 273.15 °C, − 459.67 °F or 0 Kelvin), which is colder than space itself, making the submicroscopic particles behave as a single quantum entity since bosons can occupy a single quantum state in contrast to fermions which cannot,- meaning this form of condensation only occurs with bosons. Matter in this phase or form acts as if it consists of only one atom. To me, it only sounds like devolution or at least a borderline, regardless of the process it undergoes and the abilities it has since this process seems very rare and has yet actually not been found to occur naturally, at least on Earth, due to the complicated processes matter must undergo to reach Fermionic condensation or Bose-Einstein condensation. Since electrons are fermi, they cannot form BEC, but their electrons, with the same net charge, can be joined on certain occasions, so-called Cooper pairs of electrons, and at this stage, they can thus condensate to Fermionic condensation and behave like a BEC; further leading matter to be superconductive - where there is no current resistance by matter in the conductor. In this way, the electrons can travel as close to, if not at the speed of light, yet having other forces, like gravity, and its own energy and mass it's endowed by from Higgs field, and so forth stopping them to instantly "warp travel". Photons are in comparison massless and have no energy, which makes them affectless from the Higgs field but since they are not electrically charged as electrons, they have no actual energy in themselves while the Higgs boson (so-called God particle, named so not after it being believed to be God but it goes back to Nobel Prize-winning physicist Leon Lederman referring to the Higgs boson as the Goddamn particle, after having a hard time finding it for real) on the other hand is a boson being a fundamental particle with mass related to Higgs field, and with it in the creating of mass in general. "Not even an atom’s (zerre) weight in the heavens and the earth, or something smaller or greater than it is hidden from Him, but all are in a clear record", says the Quran 34:3. "Zerre" is the Arabic word for atoms and particles in button- or round shapes. Particles come to existence through different invisible fields such as Gravity, electromagnetism, Higgs field, which in turn are also themselves considered being matter and these give forms, mass, and energy to the particles which are the building blocks of the world,- in a way scientists yet have to discover. Particles have what is called "spins" which is a vector-form in momentum, thus making them both objects and motion of clustered electromagnetic and radiating energies. Spin-value 0 means that the particle is spheric, and 1/2 spin means it could be seen as linear compression or vector, while spin 1 would roughly be a spin that takes 360 degrees to return to its original state. Fermions, and thus electrons have spin 1/2 from pole to pole, while bosons have spin 1.

Electrons are a way to understand the entire universe, all of these smallest constituting substances are mass and motion at the same time, embodied with a tremendous force that keeps everything alive. The notable spiritualist and scientist Emanuel Swedenborg, wrote a book called "Om Darrningar", or "About tremors/vibrations" in English, where he as early as in the early 1700s said that everything was constituted out of vibrations, and he was also sure that sound and light further were such. He wisely stated, in a very old kind of Swedish: "Tager man thet allmenna förnuftet til rådz, och går thermed lengre och lengre in i efftertancken, vtletande hwad egentel, är som giör thet wi lefwa, hwad ett lefwande wesende beror alrainnerst vti, så faller man omsider i the tanckar at thet thet är en rörelse: gier ju icke thet allmenna "förnutet" med, at thet som lefwer thet rör sig, thet är, at ett lif och ett warande wesende är oafskildt ifrån ett rörande". Transl. "If one takes common reasoning as advice, and goes thus further and further in reflection, really searching after, to what makes us alive, what a living being is in its inner, then we fall in thoughts that it is a motion: then doesn't the common sense give us that, all which lives moves, that is, a life and a being are inseparable from movement". He actually goes so far and believes that even objects we consider motionless, like rocks and wood, are vibrating, though at a smaller pace. In this way, his ideas have become a sectarian form of religion, wherein many famous people (Swedenborgians) use his methods to, what Swedenborg taught as trying to tap with this universal motion, thereby gain an esoteric and spiritual knowledge of the unseen. Once, in 1759 different independent sources witnessed how Emanuel, being in Gothenburg at that time, suddenly started yelling "Stockholm is on fire, Stockhol i son fire", and surelly enoguh the city stood in flames that day,- the notorious "Great Stockholm fire". These moving and bursting particles get their energy and consistency out of unseen fields of the universe, as mentioned before. As quoted earlier the Quran seems to mention such an unseen field which holds everything in order: "Allah is He who raised up the heavens without any pillars, that you can see", chapter 13:1. It's interesting that a book as old as the Viking age/later Iron age, tells about quantum fields that only have been theorized in modernity and may hold the secret of space, time, and matter. The need of teaching God's message in a common understanding has made the Quran based on an easily accessible language and the word "pillars" here is used to symbolize the separation between space and matter, and further give room for examination and categorization. Yet, it also seems to show that these fields are energetic, contractive & expansive, and coherent. "With power did We construct heaven. Verily, We are expanding it", says the Quran 51:47. Here is a similar verse from the Bible: "It is he that sitteth upon the circle of the earth, and the inhabitants thereof are as grasshoppers; that stretcheth out the heavens as a curtain, and spreadeth them out as a tent to dwell in", Isaiah 40:22. Here, in this verse also a spherical earth is described. This idea of an expanding universe is widely accepted by physicists after astronomers have discovered by measurings that objects in space are gradually moving away from each other. But if we cannot observe these power-fields and quantum particles and if some particles don't have mass, how can we assume their existence and how can massless things exist? They do so by instead having the momentum and motion, equivalent to mass, in the forms of waves, rather than energetic resistances related to encountered forces. To become existing without mass, photons can't be at rest and must always travel and a particle in constant motion has always the Universal Speed or "the speed of light". So, now photons are particles and not waves? Einstein got the Nobel Prize in 1921 for his theory that light, bosonic photons, are particles and that their density defines their energy, but the debate is still ongoing and the best theory, as proposed idea by Albert Einstein himself, is that the flow of photonic particles acts like a wave. No one has seen these particles, "energies", constituting fields, dark matter, and so forth but we see how they act in the universe as means and compositions of a coherent and meaningful space. As one said, "everything is relative" and at some point, the diffusion gives us a moment to choose a rational theory and act upon that conviction. Is peanut butter a solid or a fluid? We can touch it and it's hard but yet with a gentle stroke on bread, it spreads like a liquid. The consistency or form of butter is relative to how hard we press on it! Can someone really claim that matter undergoes different phases and how many are there then and will we ever benefit or know them all? The answer depends on situations and environments given, like temperature, pressure, and electromagnetic fields, to name some. It's the same with religion, some are convinced that God is made up, while others believe in the signs that a Creator of everything must exist. It's all choices and more important than that is action and how well the ideas work in development, and finally, if the results are equal to the core thought itself. BEC and Fermionic condensates look more like a subgroup of either condensation, gas, or fluids called superfluids, but I'm not a scientist of physics either so.

Ambition and knowledge in post-modern science are becoming more superfluous in Taxonomy, the knowledge of categorization, reflecting human's greed for knowledge together with the lack of gratefulness. "And if all the trees on the earth were pens and the sea (were ink wherewith to write), with seven seas behind it to add to its (supply), yet the Words of Allah would not be exhausted. Verily, Allah is All Mighty, All Wise", Quran chapter 31:27. In Hinduism they similarly believe in "Anantaa vai Vedaah", meaning Veda (knowledge or insight in Sanskrit, and also the name of the Hindu scripture collection) is infinite, where some is "Sruti" - heard or revealed in metaphysical ways, and "Smriti" - remembered or that knowledge interpreted from "Sruti" by humans. Many scientists are aware of a greater mystery revolving around the existence of the universe, and they seldom choose to be atheists (50 of the Nobel Prize winners were believers, and some others are Galileo Galilei, Isac Newton, Guglielmo Marconi, Albert Einstein, Luis Pasteur, Rene Descartes, William Thomson Kelvin - after who we got the base units to measure temperature in so-called Kelvins where Absolute 0 is 0 K), yet their scientific methodological and instrumental search for measured evidence to their theses is by antireligious and atheistic persons advocated as if modern science rejects a notion of a Creator Deity. Humbleness towards infinite knowledge and the limitations of our own capacities and weaknesses is lacking for the reason that some people need to elevate themselves above others or are simply demanding a narcissistic type of recognition in the expanse of society's needs and well functioning. This is shown more in humanistic sciences where scholars more often undermine common ideas and common sense in general. You know what this is about. Our Northern societies, living in shame and guilt aroused by previous atrocities done to dissidents, has evolved a distancing from personal conviction, regarding identity aspects of 1) race or nationality, 2) gender, 3) religious belief, 4) political stand view, 5) knowledge and consensus, to name a few. To be proud or being nostalgic to one national identity and ancestry is regarded as racism being based on mere romanticized and intellectually constructed symbolism of genetic identity, when factually it's just nourishing roots and celebrating exceptional and significant events and traditions. To practice and express once religious faith is seen as extreme and irrational, when factually it's just once right to do so. To be a man or woman and follow bodily needs is seen as dumb and obsolete, when factually it's just instincts being based on scientific facts. To have an opposite political value is seen as a threat to order and happiness, when factually it's in adaptation politics functions as it was meant for. Feminism was at the beginning an idea of creating equality between genders and making a realization of gender roles as socially constructed, but today we discuss if the biological and physical gender per se also is socially created. In the long term, it could be, if we intellectualize the concept of gender or if creatures for some reason needed to change, but this process probably took a longer time than during a lifetime and was probably more codifying and inspirational rather than seeing a being being transformed instantly. Then there is the distinction between sex and gender as being different notions whereas gender is socially constructed, based on the habitual view of sex, according to Gender studies in Science. If we can categorize these two concepts as separate features, we then must agree that to a certain condition they also are unique in comparison to each other. Now, I think the idea of changing physical gender is interesting and maybe could benefit, yet today we are stuck with biological and metaphysical differences like DNA and chromosomes, where males have XY and females XX, not to mention the ability to give birth and dropping information to female eggs. It's contradictory to say that gender is socially constructed as a thought or idea, thus making it a metaphysical aspect, but at the same time chop of physical genitals. When people allow themselves to be irrationally ruled or influenced under emotions and beliefs, they become fact-resistant, and then that standpoint becomes a zealous obsession rather than a constructive conviction. Is there no actual physical sex, according to Gender researchers? Are people supposed to turn a blind eye when it comes to their sex organs, DNA, genealogy, economical crisis, facts of death, not to mention techno-moralism? Since we are not able to radically change our biological premises, we have to be rational and realistic and be who we are. No wrong in some person being born with strange gender and chromosomes and thoughts regarding identity in general, as DNA is what one might think as what God has written as in man's destiny, but since we are not there yet I would like to be free from social exclusion and free to be logical and believe that we are equal not in how we look, think or call ourselves, but mostly in how we act upon this earth. Or, can you call me a king because I think I am, and can you all act as if I'm one now, write it down in every constitution of the universe? Sorry for being hurtful towards someone's emotions, but emotions are just guidelines of thought processes (while feelings are the body's physical awareness of its state) and not a fundament on which to base your acts upon.

"Man lives only to learn and if he learns is in the nature of his lot, for good or bad", Don Juan. We are created from a mother and a father and have been so since the beginning of humankind,- in Abrahamic religions called Adam and Eve. These two are also being challenged in regards to their true existence as the focus probably more lies in their naming from religious roots, rather than their physical existence. For, no matter what they were called, we still must have come from two persons, probably. According to the Quran, Iblis, or Satan refusing to bow down to Adam after Adam was ordered to name all stuff, got expelled from Heaven and so later he pledged to deceive humans. Adam and Eve disobeyed the God by eating from the tree and later were sent down to earth as rulers of the planet. According to Christians and the Bible this happened only a couple of thousand years ago, around 7000 or so, which would contradict the existence of Homo Sapiens being over a hundred thousand years. My theory is that Adam and Eve actually gave rise to an evolved human species as their progeny mixed with the Stone Age people and thus started the agricultural and pastoralistic human, long before where the Neolithic period is today placed by historians and archeologists, which must have taken a long time to develop, and not a couple of thousands of years and yet not hundred of thousands of them either. It's just a hypothesis yet to be thought about. As I told before, life is a test of God to see who amongst us acts best, which makes the world a playground of some sort. And my theory is that God slowly but surely developed humans to become what we see today, and when He was pleased, He planned to put the crown to this by sending Adam to earth as the end result, meaning that there must have existed creatures resembling humans before our original parents descended here, which could breed with us, and so the definition of man lies in the possibility to define the existence more than others. So, let's see what I had as a dream this very night.

I heard people talking about dogs' teeth and whether they are carnivorous or omnivorous. The talk slowly got into evolution and someone said that we can see how God created creatures in stages by examining animal teeth. I then saw land divided by oceans and small creatures becoming larger, and then fish to large marine reptiles whose fins became legs in others who then rose to walk the shores, and then the beasts of earth became smaller and more evil. This led to the story of Noah and the famous flood of religious knowledge. I was shown the earth becoming succumbed by the oceans with waves covering the highest mountains, so much that my eyes couldn't see the horizon. But as I raised my head again, I suddenly saw the waters residue and one big ship, followed by a smaller, plowed the high tides. I felt the God's presence from the right as a Great Force having more compassion and wisdom.

As one obviously noticed by now, I get these dreams of "the world end" and at the ends day, they are just common sense theories of how He can destroy you all, in one way or another. Is it not so that many religious books already told how the world ends, yet not when it will occur? He has the power to do whatever He wishes and is also a merciful God, full of wisdom and understanding. I don't really know what the two ships symbolize, but as the first came, a loud voice cried out "Noah". When the second showed up behind, I felt it was to be another kind of story.

A big, lush, and green tree,- stood with its branches, hanging down in a bow, over the beauty below. Its shades covered the heat, as she sat on her seat. Above a rock with golden hair, flowing down over her, so delightful and fair,- blushing and flirting, she looked at me, yet only to see. Who is this blond and possessive dark-eyed lady, is it from Him maybe? Completely naked, but, with one hand over her breast, and whith the other down lower, she lonely & only was in cover. This is a wide-eyed virgin in heaven, and her nothing else could resemble - or maybe those who the God in eternity will remember. While covetous staring at her shyness and sweet-wide smile,- I woke up to long, for her hidden longing, just to know to whom I was belonging.

God, I ask, make my previous faults right and my heart softer. Hate suffocates love, and love suffocates hate, which you choose to quench will be the eternal sense, for the hater having no defense, but for the true lover without any expense.

In the darkest times with people hiding in even darker rooms of hidden houses, war was raging and still, they had the will to live and continue the day with joy, kinship, and friendship. I met two men, one older and one younger, while we crouched under the windows from the hollowing wind outside and dreadful silence inside before the great battle. A baby boy was on the floor wrapped in warm clothes looking like a cocoon in security. His smile said, "I know you dad and I believe you will meet me".

"That's a special name or a twist on a common Albanian name, for my son", I thought to myself. As the younger man picked the little boy up, we prepared for the unrepairable but with certainty that God will grant us a strong conquest.

When I woke up, from this dream, I was puzzled because my son is called Yll and in another strong dream, I saw that I would have yet another son and I thought that I will name him Lorick,- a Dardanian name. (It seems that Shqipëtars always have had two countries since ancient times). But the God is only One and smarter and I interpret His dream as Yll is the boy in this latest dream though he was born first, as to not make a difference between two children as all are children of our first father Adam and we are all equal. But since Lorick was the Dardanian boy, the God wishes us to understand that our lives are predestined and He cares for those who use their senses wisely.

If I won't get Mira and Yll back and the loves I miss, I will never ever marry again or have children. I promise by the sky, it's guiding stars of the lost's night and its daily light, that one can fix broken stuff but never a broken word and heart, and I put my hope that only the God can do it all fine again. Also, I don't know if all is only wishful thinking, brain making, or satanic, but pray to the Lord of the worlds that His gifts are true and good. Alas, if this would be true, would I wish for it? Is hope dead and love long gone so nothing good can be done? My self, body, and soul, are in His hands, the One who knows and sees all and who always guided and remembered me.

The war in Ukraine is a sign that men are what the angels once promised their Lord that they would be. Bloodsheders and transgressors. "(And (remember) when your Lord said to the angels: 'Verily, I am going to place (mankind) generations after generations on earth.' They said: 'Will You place therein those who will make mischief therein and shed blood, - while we glorify You with praises and thanks (Exalted be You above all that they associate with You as partners) and sanctify You.' He (Allâh) said: 'I know that which you do not know.'", the Quran 2:30. The war began when the people of Ukraine or a part of them wanted to change their political situation and get closer to the EU and NATO (a russophobic organization that had before the war in Kosovo never used weapons in conflicts. But since Russia and Serbia have close political connections, they used their Veto to stop the UN to reach an ending to the bloody killings, persecutions, and expulsions. I thank the US, the Clinton administration, and the God, for the help which ended a horrific tragedy in the heart of Europe and the soul of our present worldly state.) As Ukraine changed its President and regime, Vladimir Putin and the Russian army annexed Crimea. This peninsula was given to them by Russia as a peace gift, which now is foolishly being taken back. The Crimean declaration of independence says the following words in the paraphrase:

Serbs and Putin never forgot what NATO did in the Albo-Serb war of the late 1990s, it seems, but at least we can hope we never forget the previous world wars and the one that preceded them,- the Crimean war of the 19th century. This war was the bloodiest and largest before the first Great War which led to the Second World War, right after the Balkan wars and the assasination of the Austro-Hungarian Prince Ferdinand. God is wise, giving, and merciful, so take heed of the words of the strong. If Israel and Palestine is the holy land, then Shqipëria is the accursed counterpart, literally because that's what we call it - "the accursed mountains". And I will not lead struggles. It's up to every leg to stand up and every voice to speak and every eye to see for themselves and I'm not prophesizing of the "End war", though it may come, as it is predicted over and over again, but also because we know that if we cannot turn back, we will heed to the wall with force till the head cracks open, blood gushes and we proclaim "How stupid of me, I can't go further and now I can't turn back because I'm hurt, lost and in anger, no beautiful results can come, I regret this decision". And don't forget the story of Pharaoh, he also went beyond what God ordered and he only turned back in heart as he turned back to the Lord with his soul to be judged for his crimes. "All too late", the angels proclaimed in the name of their God, and then the Pharaoh sadly drowned. We can only fight ourselves and forgive our fellow human beings and not the opposite, to fight others only to never be forgiven by the Passion, the Truth, the Love, and the Hope of the eternal Paradise.

As an electrician I many times work with physics formulas and calculations with help of Algebra. The word "algebra" is a Latinization of Al-jabr, meaning reunion of parts apart in fractions. It was first coined by Al-Khwarizmi,- an Islamic medieval scientific mathematician and scholar, whom we need to thank for also giving us the decimals and hence the possibilities to calculate Algorithms, also a Latinized word taken from his name. The Northern world got a spin of start during the "Enlightenment" and before that the "Renaissance", which lead to the Europeans gaining new material advantages, ironically from the time before have been extremely spiritual and also superstitious. Among many things we discovered and mastered, with what religion would say - "the leave of the God", electricity is one of the main reasons we have a multicultural and interesting society, with electronics and media which brings us all together again. Other Islamic inventions are the monocular, which Galileo innovated to become the telescope, airplanes but without an engine (the aerodynamic wings were invented by Muslims during the Golden ages of Islam), and ironically the distiller was also invented in Bagdad during this time, although many Islamic inspired societies discourage or forbid the drinking of alcohol.

I dreamed that I was given a formula which I quickly wrote down after I woke up. (x ± y) × Φ² = ∞. If this is a logical one, I don’t know yet, but is there anyone who could solve this, without me telling it first then? It actually tells how infinity works, I believe or interpret it, but simply from a religious point of view, in the meeting with the Ultimate reality and the oneness of might and kingship. This formula can also tell when "the night of destiny" occurs. There have been a lot of scientific discoveries inspired by dreams and visions and it would not be our first time to do an interesting favor to the understanding of life through metaphysics. Ramanuj, the Indian mathematician who is said to have "invented infinity", a blasphemous statement (which he himself never stated), got his formulas from dreams. And also Einstein had many visions, and one led to the Special & General Theory of Relativity. I of course don't know if I ever will say facts as big as those from these two, but I used to hate maths and now I marvel at it. In North, we count parts in percent, mostly, but in Islamic tradition, fractions are more widely used. The (x) & (y) in my formula is a way to tell a person's actions in fractions and thus multiplied with φ² it tells us the eternal existence of someone, either negative or positive. What I have come to realize is that these formulas are representations of the creation as being made with truth and relatively speaking, everyone has their own experience and conclusion of it, further meaning we can have more than one way of explaining the one truth out there to show that the God is powerful in doing whatever He wishes and by this to also test us to see who acts in the best manners and strives most for the infinite. In this dream, I also met my "dream woman" who was mesmerized by God's knowledge and His ways to explain,- He showed eternity as being a spiral without a vector start & end. But, at the end of the day, females are to me a bigger enigma, harder to solve than any mathematical problem. We can only hope that they become easier to get close to and understand.

What is eternity, is another question I and a friend once asked? Einstein had the idea that matter, space, and time are inseparable and if one is left out of the equation the other has no existence, thus nothing can be. If one thinks about how this theory of relativity works, in reality, we need the concept of what time, matter, and space are and this is the constitution of existence, and they are bound to physical laws which we also can study via maths. Matter is quantum things that exist in the bordered room, called space and without the time it would not move, being a panorama without a true sense of meaning. To measure the time we use motion, of course, but still, we have a different tastes in what rhythm to follow. We in the west mostly use solar time, while the ones around the equator follow the lunar counterpart more frequently, and the reason is as follows. To measure the time we need to have a focal point starting and ending somewhere. Without a start and finish it wouldn't be a meaning to try to deduce time without knowing where to focus. Think of it as being in a dark bunker, without light, and you need to follow certain times,- in this context as we speak metaphysics, we can say meditation. If one is used to meditate at night, it would be interesting to study how this presumed searcher would know when to do it. If space doesn't exist, then there wouldn't be room for all which exists to be in. Lastly, if matter wouldn't exist, yah you can think yourself if you existed so to say. Now, eternity is a state where time, space, and matter doesn't exist, and let's start with time since we speak of paradise. Since there is no start and beginning, there can thus be no time and now you understand. Matter has no meaning where time doesn't exist and thus the "things", or what you would like to call them, have no physical boundaries. And further, having no time and matter there is no space so this is an adventurous place to live in, where we all the time can explore new places and visions. Thus, eternity exists as a timeless and endless realm, continuesly where everything imaginable is possible. And easy as it sounds, it is not a big deal for a god who created life and death. All this is in the God's dominion; He has no end and no beginning and made us to love, believe and submit in our souls to Him. The world is a test, a playground, laboratory, example, sign, and truth to His Omnipotence and mercy to all.

I saw myself walking down a hill, surrounded by a desolate environment. This is known as "Jabal Kaaba" in Islamic tradition. While walking down, with shaved hair, "ihram" (the pilgrimage clothes, consisting of two white sheets made out of cotton and having no seams, like in many other faiths as well with the only difference in manners and the color they have - in India mostly orange or yellow, in Christianity the robes are usually brown), and in march, one of us left the line going towards two sitting dudes beside the right side of the road, when suddenly a sword from heaven, symbolically cut his feet at his knees.

In the short distance, the Kaaba was seen, enlighted by bonfires and only a few wicked people, otherwise being empty of life. As we marched in confidence and conviction of the God, I slowly woke up. This is a similar dream to the one Prophet Muhamed also seems to have had, before he made the first "Umrah" (the minor pilgrimage, mentioned as obligatory in the Qur'an- though some say it is optional, based on "the sunnah") with his companions and the first believers in Medinah Munawarah, on the 4:th day of the Islamic month of Dhul Qada - the same day I arrived in Mecca and Kaaba.

According to Islamic history, this happened after a failed attempt, due to the confederates (unbelievers of Mecca) and an outbreak of a disease in Medinah which postponed the pilgrimage to some year later. When he finally entered Mecca he was left in peace and the victory was clear, after more than a decade of both ideological and material struggle.

In 2020, I had managed to save some money, from my former firm FireMountain (which mounts solar panels, etc) to go for the pilgrimage, but due to some privacy issues with family and the outbreak of Covid-19, I also couldn't partake in the jurney, before this very year. I wish there were words to say how stupid it feels to tell this, but I felt like taking my own life, so one morning on the first of May, I woke up, put my clothes on, booked a ticket to Amman, Jordan, and left Hallali and my apartment, in the surety that all will be fine. It was this or that someone would find me hanged by the rope, embarrsing I know but also the fear of maybe being aggressive to someone innocent made it more convincing to me. I was in the capital of Jordan for a whole month, when I got the news that Saudi Arabia had initiated a liberalization of visas and social life, in particular for women. They are now not in need of male guardians and as such, they can leave their houses by themselves, work, drive cars, participate in sports, visit events such as sports and cinemas, and of course covering like before is not mandatory anymore. Yet, most still prefer the "ninja look" anyway (which I thought they looked like), it seems. 40 countries, including all of the EU, can now easily apply for a tourist visa through the internet, and for the believers, Mecca & Medinah are also open. So, I managed to get there by a cheap yet comfortable bus, and stayed in K.S.A for two whole months, sleeping at mosques and getting free food from them, like tradition tells that Muhamed, may he rest in peace and have eternal gifts, and his companions also did.

Saudi Arabia has a population consisting of mostly foreigners, upto 60%. Most of them are from Pakistan, Bangladesh, and Egypt. "Yah basha", they say to all. It means "Hey Pasha" in English - the Egyptians greet each other like this as an honor. A Pasha was a governor in the previous provinces of the Ottoman empire. They especially high regard the Albanian Muhamed Ali Pasha, a king of Egypt from the 18:th century. Muhamed conquered Mecca & Medinah - Heejaz - Palestine, Jordan & Syria, and a part of southern Turkey. Though the ruler was the Sultan in Istambul, Muhamed Ali Pasha actually had a paria government of his own. The rise of the Saud family and Muhamed Al Wahab (founder of Wahabism) began as an opposition to the Albanian rule of the holy sites. The army of Muhamed consisted of mostly Albanians, which provoked the traditions of the Arabs. But he managed to crush them and not some 150 years later the family of Saud finally managed to take control of Hejaz from the Ottomans.

I also visited Giza in Cairo, Egypt - went into the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu (Cheops), but not until the very last day of my visit here - though I lived an eye from them, seeing the beige, stable and timeless structures every day, while walking through the funnily bizarre and familiar Gamal Abd-El Nasir street. Instead, I used to sit with people I came to like, and we had such a fun time, so I didn't see interest in the site, not to mention missing my children made it not so morally right to go there anyway, is not the least to say. The city is big, dirty, crowdy, hot, noisy, smelling, full of farm animals, and in desperate need of food and income. The Sisi government is not popular a tiny bit, and no one had a single positive word about their President. The ticket to the site costs 240 pounds, reduced to 100 for students, and 440 for entering the Pyramid, reduced to 200 for students. I paid full price for the site but remembered that I'm a registered student of Renewable Energy at Chalmers University of Technology, so I paid only 200 for the Pyramid. What I want to say is that, after crouching in narrow halls and steep stairs surrounded by humid walls and hot hard to breathe air, just to see the completely naked tomb inside (this was just discovered in the last century and since it lacks hieroglyphs and paintings, as normal ancient Egyptian tombs have, the historians assume that it was unknown to the Egyptians and thus further it may be another civilization who built the Pyramids), I went out saying "I seek refuge from Satan the outcast" feeling something shady was about to creep upwards my heart to the head. Outside, the guy in the office, from whom I bought my tickets, demanded I hand over the tickets. He said I had to pay full price for the entrence to Khufu Pyramid, and him personally. I regret that I just didn't give it at that moment, but after being hustled far too many times (once, on my first day I bought a single falafel for 100 pounds, but while going for breakfast the next, it only cost 10) so I wanted to be clear and demanded that we should go to the office instead. Walking through the desert sand we came across an Egyptian family and the office dude said to the father, in Arabic, to play as being his boss. "Khalas akhi", I said, meaning "cut it out brother",- me understanding all he was planning to do. Later we saw a Police officer and he was just cool, standing there with his sunglasses and acting all indifferent, seemingly thinking: "seen this many times before". "Go to office!", he calmly and expressionless told us to do. In the end, we came to the office, and before my new best friend started talking I had something hidden under my sleeve myself.

There he stood with anger, just looking confused and worried.

I then ended up buying some overpriced souvenirs, just to try to support them, which I have now given away to friends and family. One of these was a statue of Cleopatra - the mysterious and last queen of ancient Egypt. Her ancestry was from the Ptolemaic dynasty. King Ptolemy ruled the legacy of Alexander the Great in Alexandria, after his death. Her name is mentioned in Homer's Iliad as a royal Dardanian name, later given to the last Pharaoh of ancient Egypt. Cleo had relationships with both Ceaser and Mark Anthony but due to betrayal, she killed herself,- according to some by letting venomous snakes bite her hands and feet. The name Cleopatra was an ancient Dardanian name mentioned in the Iliad of Homer. So, we Albanians are loved there, as one might understand, and I used to say to my Egyptian friends that "my heart is from Egypt", which made them proud and talkative. Many of the tourists I encountered were Albanians and strange enough almost no Egyptian knew where Sweden was.

This exact conversation happened, believe it or not, a couple of too many fun times. "Muhamed Ali Pasha", they always commented to me whenever we revealed our nationalities to each other in Saudi Arabia, brothers with whom I have shared the last dates, laughs, and embarrassed myself with through our language barriers. The ticket man made a great impact on my visit, and many times I wonder if he maybe had children and family and who they then were, and maybe he was only trying to support them, which was the saddest part of the experience and made me rethink my standard in the West. So I went back as planned, though I wish I could be with my newfound friends for a longer time, from Athens with its cradle of Western culture in Acropolis, for some time, and lastly to my home, - Laholm. The journey, as most of the same caliber, was fun, hard, spiritual, material, heartbreaking, uniting, interesting, so giving, and unforgettable at the end.

Just a background story of my escape to the Arabic dunes and heat, all scared that what I'm going to say now would evolve to me ending locked up, for no honest reason, where I would not be able to have the courage to face the light anymore:

This is going to be very personal, yet thoughtful. I feel obsessed with spirits or love, I actually can't really tell, but I at the same time feel tranquility and I also know that this great feeling soon will disappear. And, exactly a week ago, I dreamed of me meeting my family at their apartment but the dream was ambivalent in some way. It took place at night, and in the dark, all I saw was the house facade with lightened windows and a text in the center which I tried to read.

The text said my name, embedded in a string of other, at that time, unreadable letters. The next day, I called my father and brother and to my brother especially I told them about the dream while at the same time reading a note of a decision sent from the Swedish "tax authorities". I deeply am a wise guy and I also know how to separate the evil from good, but I need to share what it said. Lumnia and her social office probably had applied for my family to have a protected residence, after their new move to a new place, thou I always knew their whereabouts and never did anything to hurt or show threat towards them, but a certain Magdalena of the office had rejected that wish to split me from my children considering the person I was, am and will be. THIS DECISION CAN'T BE OVERRULED! it said on the letter, in capitals. Well anyway, Swedish laws always have two sides on paper and the other one they never show until it is necessary. I never trust these backstabbers anymore. Society adjusts truth to their conception, rather than perceiving and accepting it as it naturally is.

So, at night I went to them having a gun and two knives, Constantine the great coins, and some other stuff. I love jokes but now take me seriously, please. The presents for my children were an airgun, and scout knives, I am sorry. And as usual, I screwed up, not even considering she might have another life with someone else and she of course knew that I am hasty. I heard Yll and Mira screaming and quarreling, before bedtime.

They suddenly became quiet and in a rush, she opened the door screaming and tried to push me,- instead of not opening it in the first place. Yll was only in a t-shirt and underpants, and I, always had Lumnie in the periphery looking at their apartment. Only two rooms, a pantry kitchen, and the living room together, in this all to a small apartment for three seemingly almost as being "trailer park children", her included naturally. There I met three children, just about to go to sleep, and coming to them at this time, I caught all by surprise.

This poem I came up with before I that morning desperately jumped out of my comfortable sheets and left my pregnant cat, whom I haven't seen for 5 months now:

But I couldn't go anyway with this, so after 20 minutes or so I was thrown out by them, hehehe. Now, I have the gifts but who will I give those to you might want to think? As earlier said, I love the woods and bushcraft and I hoped that I, Mira, and Ylli can camp together in my big funny tipi, and so they can meet Lalli's soon-to-come babies.

My small cottage is now rented to someone else; Hallali is on some adventure according to my sister (but her kittens are fine. One was kept by her - Toppis - the cutest, most friendly, and adorable thing ever seen. Once I accidentally sat on him and not until my nephew screamed at me I realized it was there, not making a single sound or move. In contrast to his mother who acts as if she has never seen people before, being egoistic and staring like as being surprised that we know each other. Where is she now, God?); my family is broken; I have no income; and my friends assume I know magic and am selling their souls to Satan; some think I have some psychiatric condition, other say I'm not an Imam so I shouldn't talk about Islam (while they paradoxically never even gave thoughts to God, being all non-religious anyway); the police are probably listening to my phone as I have been to K.S.A, and not to mention my sketchy contacts with the world under - as I said before I am a big test for all - my mother is annoyed by me,- and so, where is the help of the God?

I wish that no exposed woman or person shall go through violations and that no child should be abandoned either by parents or society and that the State needs to change the laws on this topic to not blame females for socio- and psychopaths who submits to their self-inflicted humiliation just to later act in some non-honoring criminal way,- and they call these crime "honor crimes", puh no. Now, I think that society needs to take heed. I'm now waiting for what will happen and I told the tax authorities that it's very easy for an IT-savvy to track down persons, and being I nice guy I told her in secrecy, so I will here not share how and I also explained that I only wished to hand over my strange presents and meet them before they of course move again. I would go to hell for them and never come out again and dream of Yll and Femermira (the only one with her name, who I pray for that she will search for the truth) at least once a week or two. Of course, I will never share my method with psychos. Nevertheless, I must encourage all to accept my way of life, or be kind and adore Him, He who sees and knows whatever is hidden and obvious,- my God the Creator of men and women, through whom He also evolved their offspring.

I saw a black screen, and in the right bottom corner it said: "Guden", meaning "the God" in Swedish. My thoughts were sad and said in the whispering of the self, that some probably worshiped it or my pseudonym as being a God, or what some think is a ”halfgod”, rather than turning the soul toward its maker - the Love, the Pen, the Eternal, the Compassionate & Merciful Creator of all worlds. My eyes suddenly instead moved towards the top left corner, but I woke up from this dream just as I was about to see what was hiding there in the dark shades.

My life is misunderstood, as are the religious individuals in their respective traditions, in modern times, also the free-willed, and yet so is my totemic old tribe. Let me apologize for mentioning the Albanians frequently which has dealt a lot with religion & policies, but are people still, up to postmodern times, making up "albanohatric" theses subjectively, (I don't prefer the word "phobic" anymore and will so do also further on, since its meaning suggests fright rather than ill-will to opposites) just as many humanistic academies have come to engage in, unjustly arguing (probably being afraid to also change beliefs and thus further to turn to Islam as we and the Boshniaks so nicely did, some 500 or so years ago, as was destined for us by the "Omnicreare"!?) that the history of the Balkan Albanians is just "make wish" national theories by us? Well, is there anyone here who still goes and reads fascinating books? Some of the ignorants also go so far as just to make Adolf, Bush, Clinton, and Trump, not to mention George Washington; yah, probably even E.T far away from home, and the Martians as well, and more, Albanians. If you can't afford the cost of buying these awesome texts, then visit a public library, for the God's sake, and read the original and ancient records yourselves, to discover what has been, is and One Day will be known as an interesting truth, about the religious evolution of the West,- who in later centuries also affected the entire globe! "Love wins over everything", a wise Nordic proverb famously teaches humans. And as famously the Beatnik movement used to strive to be and fuzzy said - Peace, Love & Understanding, "yall".

My chaotic and sad story is getting into a new phase. In one week from now, on the 23 of September, I have court regarding custody of my children. We will see what happens. May my God look out for us.

I defended myself alone during the court, feeling like the former president of Serbia, Milosevic, who on the other hand did it by his own wish.

The hearing ended with them being forced to prove their claimant, so we booked two more sessions for the coming year. And according to social services, the process is deemed to take long long time if I or Lumnije refuse "to lower hands". In my back, I now hear "Conquest of Paradise" by Vangelis. For you who knows,- who will have the power of the naive, will the natives be free to choose or shall ego and the bellies speak?

I might know where they are now, by the way. In a dream, Mira and Yll weren't happy to see me as a father, nor were her eyes glad to see me. I told "Skatteverket", the Swedish Tax Office, that I won't go there, and also that VPN is highly unreliable as stealth, due to it being unstable and many times depending on the connection and free server space. I just wish they are fine, where ever they now live and wish to be.

That dreadful night, in April 2015, which started this situation and also as you can easily figure out by now, was foretold in the dreams of the God who constantly oversees shortcomings and is so Mercyful.

Some days before I went bananas, an event available by reading earlier Chronicles here, I had a special, strange, and farsighted vision of what was waiting for me. In this nightly dream, I felt like my father who was standing beside the banana green house we built in the Dukagjini plain of our lands when Mira suddenly grabbed my "love handles" (the belly) from my behind and scared the living thought out of my mind. As I turned to see who was after me in small anger, I was relieved to see the bright and glad smile of hers. I turned my head to the other side,- a narrow path which I as a child had run to escape, first from my father who I, when I was around 4, thought knew I had been mischievous, thinking he could read my heart or that the God told him this, and secondly from my mother chasing me with her shouts after me being a bad boy and stupidly teased the women she was talking to. But before this, I was famous for being the "nice" and wise child. On this road, now going back to the actual dream, Yll suddenly stood at the very place where both of them, caught me just to be grabbed by my small hands and have me in tears regretting and praying for help, and this thou they were compassionate and understanding.

This is a truth. I felt confused. First came resentment which, as Yll (in the dream from a strange reason being a teenager) with his firm serious act, instead turned into joy and security. People then suddenly gathered to see what was happening.

From a house on the other side of the road, I saw a small child zigzagging, creating a white-bluish "Zeta" in the air, and having a wide smile and a wild spirit. I was at first insecure but his trickery gave me a godly high laugh as he, despite the initial unpredictability, approached our house's high walls with light. Who this is, I for now actually don't know. Standing with a proudful pose I wondered:

Without seeing them, I heard her and some female relatives talking 'n laughing while being mysteriously invisible in the center of this. The dream is a prediction that my son would be older when he sees that we are only humans and that only the truth can set us free. And that Lumia would be alone with her friends. Mira, I wish she is joyful despite the difficult stuff going on in her childhood. And the other child from a different house could be a new promise of life, family, and love with some others. What do I know? Maybe everything is destroyed for this life I used to have with Lumnije, Yll & Mira. Only He has knowledge of the unseen and can turn the day to night and the dark to light, life to death, and the dead bringing back to a new life. Winter becomes Spring and all that was dull becomes vibrant with love. I now realize that we don't decide our fate, but we are responsible for our beliefs. I don't know so much more other than that I obey my lord and pray to be shown mercy, be guided, and protected,- a wish I also have for those who believe in the Lord of everything, are close to Him, and embrace my path. Oh the God, forgive my wrongs, show me mercy; You are the only one who absolutely saved me and easily also could do it many times, Ameen!!

Tonight I had two comfy dreams. But I want to say a couple of things before telling you what was so special about those. A day or two ago I and a younger friend argued/fought. Laholm, the city where I reside since my teenage years, was the first municipality to shut down the electricity in 2/3 of the town, including street lights, obviously. There is a shop, "Israa Livs", which is owned by an Arab Palestinian and has been there since the same year I and my family moved here. They have done so to save electricity (although Sweden has had an excess of it during the past two years and actually sold a lot to neighboring countries. In the mean time, we have had 10 times higher electricity bills to pay during the past years. Who gets the money and what are they actually used for?) due to the world energy crisis. This situation is one of the reasons we see young brothers fight in Ukraine, the other is of course my Dardania, also known as Kosovo, a topic one can read about in an earlier article in this strange and interesting book. Now, many other cities have followed the example of Laholm, but some are smarter. Gothenburg has instead dimmed the lights since they use modern ones, which are dimmable. Lately, my town has instead decided to go back to full power and restore the comfort of walking in the dark, and partially it has to do with the protest of the citizens here. Many feel unsafe. I suspect it also has to do with a couple of youngsters, no names mentioned, who a couple of weeks ago threw eggs on windows. Outside Israa Livs one night ago I saw the three running as if hell was chasing them. In a sense it was. Police, in civilian cars, drove forth and back to see where the rascals were hiding. Puffing, laughing, and wearing balaclavas I came across them in the dark shadows of the old and picturesque alleys.

The laughed. I use to go to the gym a lot, so to the point that my sister being amazed said that I almost look like Arnie. Well, she probably is only being nice of course but I have been building some Thor-body for a half-decade now. I once borrowed the bicycle from my mother to go and "push the limits", but due to the dark, I almost left the path heading towards the bushes, some others walking their dogs, and of course the fence of the Lagan.

Now back to the fight between me and the young familiar to me, which was the start of this story. One time, as I was going to the city center gym, I instead decided to visit Israa Livs. It's more of an institution by now, rather than a shop to be honest. We meet there and hang out.

I hear someone call for me, but cant's see ****.

Suddenly he misunderstood me and splashed me with water from his bottle. He was mad about something else happening earlier.

I have no idea what we were doing, but suddenly he pushed me aggressively. His father is Abed, the owner of the shop, so I warned him that I would go in and tell him. Which I also did. Telling him that God is real and nights are the working hours of the unseen forces, I tried to calm the situation down. We became friends again, as usual, helping his father measure the bulbs and armature of his shop lights, which I as an electrician previously had promised him to do to later have them changed for him.

The first dreams then: In it, this friend, which had a melee with me a couple of days ago, and another Albanian one were small talking.

The Arabic Quran is what can dissolve all religious problems and issues in the World, by seeing it as a light and guidance to all humans and spirits.

The second dream ended with a small interview with Einstein. In it, I was going to a meeting for electricians. On the road, I met smart men, professors, and likewise. Some steps were leading to a big door to an educational institution of some kind. Suddenly I see Albert Einstein walking down from them.

"What a strange meeting", I said to myself and started walking to the meeting, up the stair, into an office, and inside where a female professor waited for me and the others.

As I analyze the meaning and interpret this statement in my dream yesterday, it must mean the time I first read Albert Einstein's book "The Special & General Theory of Relativity", from 1916, when I was about 13 years old in the city library of Laholm.

He was a Jewish-German-American (also an Albanian if we stretch the meaning of citizenship since Albert lived in Albania as well and got an Albanian passport so he could flee to America before WWII broke out. Jokes aside if the readers know me by now, the matter of fact is that Albania & Kosovo were the only countries that had more Jewish citizens after the war than before. It has to do with many fleeing there seeking refuge among the Albanians since the Dukagjini codex states that the host is obliged to protect his visitor, by all means, so also with his own life. Thousands of fleeing people came and got saved. They were dressed up in traditional Albanian garments, were given Albanian names, etc to camouflage them from the Fascists who sought them out. There is also a memorial in Tel Avis commemorating these acts of help for people in need) physicist whose work has given new knowledge regarding gravitational forces/waves, electromagnetism, and an understanding of how time/space/matter correlate to each other in many universal dimensions. Einstein was also a Zionist, but he proposed that Palestinians and Jews would share the land and he never advocated war, rather the opposite,- he was engaged in grassroots movements to establish a peace organization.

Before his study, men had a vague idea of how motion, time, and matter are in relation to a universal constant, and not until our days in the 2000s did scientists come to realize and prove that indeed gravity is an unseen force consisting of waves.

And though I maybe understand only half of it, the Special Theory of Relativity has come to be important not only for Physics but in the understanding of making social behavior and morals depending on the concept that time is relative to a reference point of place and lies thus in the eyes of the beholder, as based on a constant velocity = c. Imagine, as in his own example, that you are standing on a train and lightning strikes simultaneously (if that even is a possible outcome) in two different places. One strikes behind and the other in front and as you move towards, the conclusion must be that light from the light of the coming one must reach the beholder before the one striking from behind. Thus, time is relative to a constant in which "matter/mass" is objected to and limited by itself when moving in space-time continuum. An action must thus be considered as being in relation to other places in the same space or coordinates in it. In this way, we can measure for example when the light reaches from a distance stars though the earth itself moves in reference to "fixed" stars. This is Heuristic means of navigation to more general laws of nature, according to Einstein. He says:

A problem with this, as I've noticed, is that the experiments conducted to prove these theses are based on the presumption of light traveling in a vacuum. As earlier stated in my reportage, I cannot see a universe being void of everything. If vacuum here means no air, then it's understandable, yet we now understand that the planets and heavenly bodies are actually upheld by forces unseen to us. This means that there cannot be an absolute emptiness and if there would be, then also time would be a void, thus nonexisting. Let's say we remove matter from a room, then it would automatically mean that the room itself would disappear and thus time would be superfluous and nonexistent - to be short: if there is nothing then "there simply is Nothing". The only way to get comprehension is thus by mathematics and measures.

Einstein's ideas are actually built on earlier studies of optics & electrodynamics, meaning quantum mechanics and light waves. But here arises yet another issue. If the light is photons and thus quantum particles, how can they move at the speed of c (universal time constant), as nothing consisting of mass can uphold itself in this motion? So they say, photons are particles moving in a wave pattern. But there must be more to it than this mediocre and a little confusing conciliation. The light must travel in waves and as fireflies engage the photons, is according to me a wiser idea. Energy, traveling in dependence from an ultimate point of reference, must also move an enormous amount of energy affected and stored to justify its goal. Light has in my view two objects - affecting a point without actually leaving its source, although it may seem the opposite to the beholders.

What actually is the universal time constant? In science, it is c=300 000 km/s (the speed of light), but if in a coordinate we give this presumption a meaning (I am not speaking of a real situation so here it is my imagination doing this) and thus with it must come a bigger purpose,- God is the constant both as the reference point, as the motion of matter, giving unpredictable individual outcomes, measured with a higher meaning by mathematics and only so in the present. The future is as easy to come to know as the past, to be rational, but speculating about the future has more risks related to personal credibility or honor, than assuming what happened in past times and in different places for objects or persons. It has to do with the attribution of coming events to Magic and or Prophetisism.

As I said before I don't really have a strong base on quantum mechanics and the equations involved here, so my base is solely in relying on their correct measurements. More I rely on the guidance of the God, the Creator of me and the world, who helps me in difficult times. So, further on to continue with the dream:

As I was in this small office, Albert came in, as usual with a big smile, and sat down beside me.

From nowhere some colleagues of mine came in and I saw my electrician tools sitting between me and Einstein. I started studying them and picked up my bits set and said to all "Don't touch my equipment, please". I was waking up from this pensive dream by fitting the bits in their respective place of the holder and as I did it, my "self" proclaimed: "I did it, honored be He, the God who saves me over and over again".

Fun electrical facts:

To understand electricity we must understand its history. Once my old teacher in "practical electrical learning" had a "cock-and-bull story" about the origins of the word "electrician". "In the middle ages, there were some folks who practiced Magic illusions. One of their tricks was to create static electricity by rubbing a rod on different materials and placing that charged small copper rod under the index finger. They filled a glass with a flammable liquid and as they came close enough to it they discharged the rod and thus ignited the glass, to the amusement of the spectators. These later came to be known as electricians and as the demand in later centuries came for educated persons with skill in handling electricity and installing it in people's homes, they got to inherit this epithet". Not quite like this, but there is some truth in the sense that electricity has made the world to be what people would call Magic. Still, some extreme religious groups draw links to modern society with the practice of Magic, claiming that it is devilish to use technology and electronics for daily life - "it must come from Devil worship and magicians". The truth is far more simple, it's nature!

The word itself comes from the Greek word "electron", meaning amber. In late medieval times and the renaissance, they used to rub amber and noticed it got electrically charged. Later the study became more prevalent and the first forms of major experiments came during the 18th century with Michael Faraday (who also named the unit Farad (f) which is used to measure charge in for example capacitors), who used induction, electrolyte, and electromagnetism. Many attribute Benajmin Franklin for the invention of electricity but it was never invented, it is just "managed". Franklin indeed proved that static electricity and lightning were the same things,- according to the anecdote by tying a key to a kite and letting it be hit by the lightning. Who knows? Later, the Italian Volta made the battery and the Alternate current was discovered by Faraday and the French Pixii (not Nikola Tesla as many today believe, mostly due to successful marketing from Musk's electrical company with his name, who by the way in old pictures is shown wearing traditional Albanian clothes since his grandfather came from an Albanian dominant area called Sanjak and which today is accepted being Bosnian because they today speak Bosnian. Rather, the Sanjakians admit that they used to be Albanians but were assimilated by the Serbian regime 100 years ago, and they kept Islam nevertheless. I'm not saying he was Albanian but he grew up in what is known as Croatia, to orthodox parents. But his fate is indeed an unpleasant one). The only reason we use AC (alternate current) is due to the fact that it is much easier and cheaper to generate and distribute electricity with three-face AC. But, not everything works by using AC, but everything works by using DC (direct current). Direct current or DC is the more "natural" form of electricity - that which goes from + -> -, for example in batteries or electronics. Rather it is the opposite. Electrons are negatively charged, Protons are positively charged while Neutrons are neutral, so the negative electrons actually move to positive charge areas and by their motion thus creating energy that we today use, store, or distribute. This means that electrons instead move from - -> +, but humans like to think this way. The reason why people still think it is from plus to minus is that when electricity was first used they couldn't examine this relation so they simply took a 50/50 guess and got it wrong. Electrons are also the pen of computer engineering which has led us to communicate with each other from long distances. What would the world be without this mercy? In fact, it is thought that experimentation with electrolytes (batteries) and light bulbs have existed also in ancient times. I'm referring to the Baghdad batteries and the hieroglyphs of the Egyptian pyramids which some claim depicts wires connected from capacitor-looking devices, or an inductor??, to a light bulb, etc.

Men still think that it was this dude or that one who did this or that as the first one ever and ever, yet it has been knowledge as inspiration sent from their God. Who is greater than He who has planned to light up the world as a test for us, to see who does bad or good? Many of these inventors and scientists had a strong faith, and none has had more success than those attributing their carrier to only the Creator. Alber Einstein said that it was during meditation that he got the theory of special and general relativity. He sure was a believer in God, as we know.

Honor no one for knowledge if it is not shown where they got it. I just read a chronicle in "Svenska Dagbladet" by the Swedish historian and writer Dick Harrison, which taunted JRR Tolkiens claim where he stated that he never used inspiration from either Nibelungen's ring or the Norse sagas (one telling a very similar story and fate as the ring in the Lord of the rings), thou they share unambiguous similarities and the simple fact the Tolkien also was well aware of Nordic and Germanic mythology, never the less. "Both the rings are round, but there the similarities end", he once said to the question in regards to his fictional inspiration. In the article "Tråkigt Faktum - Tolkien ljög" (in English: Sad fact - Tolkien lied) Harrison writes:

But still, most of the electrical measuring units we have are actually derived from the name of the discoverer eg. Volt (for electrical potential - the force of current) from Alessandro Volta; Ohm Ω (for resistance, reactans, and capacitation) from Georg Ohm; Watt (for power, effect) from James Watt; Ampere (for electrical current) from André-Marie Ampère; Hertz (for frequency) from Heinrich Hertz; Henry ( for inductance) from Joseph Henry; Farad (for capacitance) from Michael Faraday; Gauss (for magnetic fields) from Johann Carl Friedrich Gauß; Newton/Columb N/C (for the force of electric fields) from Sir Isaac Newton, etc. etc. We live in person fixated world, meaning man only recognizes that which favors those means to achieve personal satisfactional goals, rather than simply rejecting lies and embracing facts. In the Bible and the Quran, for example, it is taught that the God has written everything down. According to my belief, it is of no difference may it be mathematical, verbal, alphabetic, molecular (DNA), electronical, or whispering of the metaphysical being. He created laws to make us believe and achieve Him. I once was confronted with a simple statement: Your Abarahamitc traditions are only bonded to laws, and not spirituality. I answer thus to this: The one being bonded to debt of blood, property, stuff, or word to another person can never, unless being a sociopath or psychopath, have a sense of peace in mind, not to mention go and meditate, which leads to light, due to post-traumatic stress. God promises eternal freedom to the ones who make the right and nice choices in life, be it to the God, herself, or fellow human beings.

We are weak beings with limitations, both psychically and bodily. It doesn't necessarily mean we cannot do marvels, rather our physic is humble yet with understanding, passion, and strong faith in the High, it can perform such huge stuff we still can't comprehend. But, some persist in vague thoughts concerning magic, polytheism, or extreme trust in materialism or scientific achievements - all being superficial vain, and impermanence.

You will see my sexual frustration now since I miss someone and of course my children. Therefore to cope with some decent information, we suggest that you are of age and have a strong and brave heart. But, before we dig deeper into what is not meant to be heard or seen, due to some pain and scream, I'm going to recall this night's dream, which was set in three perhaps seemingly unrelated parts.

I have now moved to a cabin in Skummeslövsstrand, at the beach between Båstad and Laholm. It is situated in the bay of Laholm with a gorgeous view and somewhat rich neighbors. I saw myself dreaming of being in the living room as I felt a small sting of pain from my feet. A recognizable feeling, which Halali used to inflict me with her sharp claws and small teeth when she played a proud lioness of the savannah, hunting her big buffalo, was nagging my feet. The pain is both irritating, and scary at the same time, but also so cute and fun. One should never encourage cats to behave like this, but sometimes they simply are silly. I first thought it was she who had come back to me and the nostalgia sent my memory back to unconditioned love and comfort. But, as I looked down, it was just an ordinary grey cat, unknown to me before. It didn't matter at all. It was really nice to see a big cat in my life as before I went on my desperate journey, or escape from mental illness and imprisonment, last year. As usual, cats bring happiness and with it also kids. Suddenly I had a couple of them in my new house. Particularly a petit girl took my focus. She had brownish hair and seemed so sad, with a deformed-looking appearance and it boggled me. Something inside me wanted to have her in my arms and comfort her sad eyes. I gave her a hug and looked for a reaction, but still sad. A second one. No, still sad. The third one was a big one, cheek to cheek, and suddenly she lit up in joy and laughter and the sad look was replaced by an enormous beauty. So, I decided to let her play with the other kids, which she did in a hurry.

Then without smoothness, I was in a second night dream, suddenly driving a car. But this was not easy as the roads were crooked and drivers were in some hurry. I looked at the blue pale sky and saw a paraglider but didn't first realize what it was before one suddenly took off in front of me, on the road, on top of a hill. From nowhere cars came crashing on a small bridge. Blood, chaos, screams, and fear turned the day to night. Our car rolled over and many fell out of it. Some broke their heads, bones blood gushed from their limbs, as their fragile bodies came smashing into the big cliff and rocks. I almost fell over the side of the cliff and saw the rocks and grass field waiting for me as my death bed. But I prayed to the God. And, like a seed that sprouts with force in Spring, my body was revived with power and joyfully I danced my way down, also inspiring the others who previously were in my car to do the same. We all made it down safe and fine.

Together we went to an event. I think it was a book release by a lady who was thrilled and enthusiastic about her writing. She stood behind a bar and to me, it looked like she had two jobs. One was a seeker-writer and the other was a bartender. I wanted to curiously ask her some questions and to break the ice I presented myself straightforwardly.

Suddenly a man came and started interrupting. But with patience, I waited and then continued.

She looked stunned and confused but before she had a chance to reply, another one came, also interrupting. Still, with patience, I waited for him to move on.

I now realize it was some kind of competition, although I only had professional business with her, some may have interpreted my will as sexual or flirting. She started talking about some renowned woman who had realized that we have four arms, just like the idols of Hinduism.

I was confused by her fuzzy expressions being so confident. I tried to imagine having many arms but as a believer, I was sure what to think.

A woman, who previously had shown interest in our conversations, came and stood close to us.

The writer or bartender, being for the moment in thought, sadly but still humbly, looked down while washing some glasses at the sink. "It's alright, you're going to make it, I promise", I said and unusually placed my forehead against her's which made her smile with security and certainty at my comforting words. And then, as usual, after strong emotions in dreams, I slowly woke up.

Shiva is, as said in previous chapters, associated with extraordinariness and thus mostly with his sexual force, also called Linga (which actually is an Indian word for the male genitals, while the counterpart - the female one - is named Yoni). Some argue that the phallus erected in Shaivistic worship is in fact not a Linga, but could be a symbol of the universe and that the Kaaba of Mecca is a Shiva-Linga. Bizarre as it may seem, this symbol has much importance to the adherents and is used as a fertility fetish or amulet. Contrary to the Bhagavad Gita which states:

Why does sexual desire encompass a huge religious tradition in the Indian subcontinent? In fact, Indian society is sexually limited and tabooed, similar to the Middle Eastern lands. Yet, as is part of Indian diversity, sex, and lovemaking are vital to a lot of the myths of Hinduism. To answer this we must remember that the Indian subcontinent hosts 1/4 of all living humans on Earth. The answer to why there are so many Indians is probably found in some religious traditions, maybe because of Shiva or why not the promiscuous and sexually spiritual text Kama Sutra by Vatsyayana. It has most probably influenced a couple of bed games and made marriage somewhat more exciting for a lot of people. Some say it was written as an order from a king who needed a bigger military force and by arousing his servants he hoped to get an increase in his people's population. At least the temple of Bhubaneshwar is strongly associated with the Kama Sutra and the ancient ruler of the state of Odisha. It has a lot of carvings with sexual images depicting both naked, full-round-breasted- and curved-bellied females, but also different sexual positions taken from that scripture. Besides the many references to the Kama Sutra the temple of Odisha is actually a solar calendar constructed to follow the seasons, solstices, and time in general.

Some "recommendations" are very interesting. Now for the initial warning, I had too weak-hearted. Kama sutra talks a lot about different types of sexual personalities and their intimate connection to their physic. It's a very sexually spiritual book, taking up the aspects of Dharma, Artha, and Kama (meaning Religion or order, Purpose, and Pleasure, respectively), etc. There are for example "the rabbit", "the doe", "the elephant" and so on, all having different sexual desires to achieve an ecstatic orgasm. It also talks about the anatomy of the Linga and Yoni, and for example how one can enlarge the Linga. You can use a mix of herbs or do with some kinds of prosthetics made from different materials. It also recommends perforating the Lingam and in that hole which is caused by the piercing, a rod or barbells are inserted to satisfy the female who is not easily aroused,- in this case the "Elephant lady". These are called Apadravyas and are sometimes still in use, both in the West and also traditionally in South East Asia, eg. in the Philippines, Borneo, and Indonesia where these are instead named Ampallangs. One famous Western genital piercing is the Prince Albert piercing (don't look at the pictures, for the love of Him). As the myth tells, Queen Victoria's consort had one made, so his Linga would snug smoothly in his tight pants,- yes it's of course only urban legend. Or, is it? What's known is that the British upper class, during the Empire, used to have some kind of genital piercings, as well as the famous Prince one, of course, inspired by the wild "New World". But traditional Apadravyas or Ampallangs (Am'puh-lang), which pierces the glans, are less common but still preferred by women for their males, in the far east. It was a law in some places over there, before the European colonization, giving rights to ladies to divorce their respective if he didn't pierce his precious.

These piercings are associated with sex as beauty but have a lot of physical complications, such as infections and bad hygiene, least saying and there are also high possibilities, medically documented, of devastating the sexual organs - some causing "bent penis"-syndrome and also permanent nerve damage. So, desires of the material world are in these subjects a cover of the mind, which in misuse will lead to anger and if not controlled, also rage. Lust and manipulations are common in witchcraft but have also since the late 1960s established in the West,- but here it's not called like that by traditional terms. We talk about personal satisfaction instead, or being who they "were meant to be" or "for the sake of love", et al. But maybe, If God gives humans food and encourages sex then we can rely on Him to show us the best way to prepare it and enjoy ourselves in worldly matters without limits for true men and women.

Shiva's other major name is also Mahadeva, as told in the chapter "Indian & South East Asian Traditions", meaning that Nandi, the writer of the original scriptures referring to the teachings and practices of spiritual Kama, must have been inspired by Shaivistic Lingam-Youni rituals and the complementing beliefs based on the lustful idea that a created man or androgynous person is the initiator of the World. Nandi is also the name of the companion, the bull of Shiva.

The quoted verses mean to show that the God wants men to control the satisfaction of the material by simple means and rules. Meaning, that the marriage of a believer in the God has only success with a like-minded person. You may see the verse of the Qur'an saying that females are like a tilth as a justification to forcefully lay with a wife, but consider then the allegory in romantic sides instead. I mean, If winter comes and the soil gets ground frost, that would make it impossible to work it. Or, if it gets flooded one must maybe wait for it to drain some.

I often get to answer offensive questions or defend the religion of Ibrahim, the friend of the God. "You Muslims and Christians are so law-bound. Why can't men just meditate, love, and accept everybody's lifestyle?". To begin with; how can you meditate or feel in peace from within, when children are crying over the loss of their mothers or fathers, having no protection or comfort? When there are wars, rapes, hate, and sickness around the globe? If one murders, steals, or gives false witness, is there any way to reach perfection and tranquility, and so also sit and contemplate the marvelous Creator? To meditate, to be inspired, to feel peace and light which in the pure descends right from above and settles in their chest? No, is the real response, if the person in question of course is not a psychotic sociopath and manipulates his mind so he can utilize his self or free will to the desired actions and thus get satisfaction. To be able to be in stillness by the leave of God and achieve the latent and bewildering high cognitive states of the soul, there's of course a requirement to have morals and to understand ethics; which both leads to a blame-free consciousness and so to a free self, which can by the God be inspired. Having the most epic name of modern times, and of course, being part of the developed decadency of that and the two following decades, the classical music composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart once supposedly said:

Why then do some egoistas go so extreme in power, sex, and relations? The Eternal Kingship, that's it! And, what could the Eternal Kingship be? The place of beautiful women and good companions, where the host is the God the All-Powerful, Mercyful, All Encompassing - and the center of this.

Happy birthday my son, on your tenth year!
By ”the children of the God”, I don’t say He has begotten them in any way, but that we all belong to Him and so does my small and beautiful gems. How did Ylli come to the world anyway? The sub-chapter "Old memories of the dreams of life" tells this fun & unique story. 

God was in front of me and a friend, while the both of us sat on a wooden bench-table, just like those in parks or picnic places. I don't know who the other person is, but he sure seemed to me like he was someone I know. Although the journey of this text here may end, the fate of Palamedes does not. Instead it's the bigots who now win temporarily,- but remember, "Fate shall find its way".

These dreams have been like a new day with fun, interesting, and unpredictable events, much like those nostalgic young summer times, we all have had, and which we never forget. I will of course correct this reportage, and since life is a cheerful game, my heart will submittingly be with my Maker and God, on a sort of stand-by for what we will experience here next.